You got a portal gun for your birthday...

[Sarge034]

Can't find a good picture..... but you get the point.

 

[Jimmy T. Malice]

1. Submerge device in water.
2. Look directly at the operational end of the device.
3. ????
4. Profit!

 

[mjc0961]

Put the useless paper weight on my desk. After playing Portal 2 you find out just how useless the Portal gun is...

Spoilers if you dare:

Spoiler

...Because it only works on the white paint seen in the game...which is based off MOON ROCKS!!!

That isn't to say it's not an amazing device it's just ...well you get where I'm coming from I hope.

Well you'd be wasting it because you're quite wrong.

Spoiler

There are two sets of test chambers that you go through built in time periods before they even had the white gel that allows for portal placement when splattered on walls. So obviously it works on other kinds of flat, white surfaces.

 

[TriggerOnly]

steal LOTS of stuff LOTS of stuff

 

[OmniscientOstrich]

Orange portal in my room, blue portal used on anything I want to steal. Have to say getting a portal gun might actually make me give a shit about my birthday.

 

[Gaiseric]

Shenanigans would ensue.

Yes, but your deniability would be very much diminished.

"This blue sphere came out of no where and the next thing I know, there's a pie in my face!"
"Didn't that one kid get a portal gun for his birthday?"
"Oh ya, lets go kick his ass"
>.>

I'd wear a fake mustache.
There's no way they'd be able to recognize me.
And if by some feat of Batman like detective work they did, I'd lay a fiendish trap for them.

 

[AnAngryMoose]

Shenanigans would ensue.

This. Oh, the fun I would have with my Portal Gun. I'd probably use it to fuck with my friends.

 

[AnAngryMoose]

Take over the world!

But first infinite loop.

Better idea

Get a computer have it run the following code

int g=4;

for (g=4; g>2; g++)
{
}

(for you people who don't know any programming it's basically a loop telling the computer to keep adding 1 to 4 until it stops being greater than 2)

Now put that computer through a portal loop.

Now say

"Yo dawg I herd you like loops so we put an infinite loop in yo infinite loop so you can cycle endlessly while you cycle endlessly"

It's genius!

 

[espressojet]

To be honest, I'd probably mess with it for an hour or two and then it would just stay in my closet forever... or sell it on ebay and never have to work... ever...

 

[GeneticallyModifiedDucks]

Infinite energy! I saved the world!

 

[Keava]

...what do you do with it?

The same thing we do every night, Pinky ? try to take over the world!

As to specifics, i'm not that silly to reveal them, why would i give anyone a head start on how to stop me?

 

[Communist partisan]

1. Make a prtal to GF.
2. make a portal on a airplane to Cuba.
3. Free vacation together with GF.
4. ???????
5. profit.

 

[Loki Cain]

Do I get long fall boots with it...

 

[Aykin Cakaloz]

Actually, that is NOT an infinite loop.
Do some reading about integers. I would use a "while loop"

Oh, and I would probably try to reverse engineer it. Failing that, it is a good idea to use it as a power generator

 

[Aykin Cakaloz]

Take over the world!

But first infinite loop.

Better idea

Get a computer have it run the following code

int g=4;

for (g=4; g>2; g++)
{
}

(for you people who don't know any programming it's basically a loop telling the computer to keep adding 1 to 4 until it stops being greater than 2)

Now put that computer through a portal loop.

Now say

"Yo dawg I herd you like loops so we put an infinite loop in yo infinite loop so you can cycle endlessly while you cycle endlessly"

Actually, that is NOT an infinite loop.
Do some reading about integers. I would use a "while loop"

Oh, and I would probably try to reverse engineer it. Failing that, it is a good idea to use it as a power generator

 

[holy_secret]

I'd put one to ger...
hmm. I have no use for one anylonger. I guess to work?

 

[azukar]

Not to dampen the enthusiasm of all these wannabe bank robbers, but how are you going to get one portal on the *inside* of said bank to make your heist? Maybe pass off the mysterious glowing blue oval on the wall as a new company logo?

(Yeah, I know I'm not the only person who has said it)

 

[cill404]

Infinite energy; portals above and below a waterwheel, drop some water in... world energy crisis solved.

 

[Snotnarok]

Put the useless paper weight on my desk. After playing Portal 2 you find out just how useless the Portal gun is...

Spoilers if you dare:

Spoiler

...Because it only works on the white paint seen in the game...which is based off MOON ROCKS!!!

That isn't to say it's not an amazing device it's just ...well you get where I'm coming from I hope.

Well you'd be wasting it because you're quite wrong.

Spoiler

There are two sets of test chambers that you go through built in time periods before they even had the white gel that allows for portal placement when splattered on walls. So obviously it works on other kinds of flat, white surfaces.

I'm pretty sure they had it then to, or at least were reusing their rooms. Because the ending reeeeally put a point to the material being used.

 

[Callate]

See if I can interest NASA in one more flight to the Moon with the possibility of beginning a cost-effective Helium-3 mining operation, a fuel source some believe could end the energy crisis.

Depending on how portal physics work you would need the portal on Earth to be in a vacuum less air on Earth get sucked into space.

Although I'd be really surprised if Nasa didn't have human size vaccums (if they didn't I'm sure they can make some).

Yeah, that was definitely part of the reason to contact NASA- I was suspecting some kind of airlock mechanism at the "Earth" end of the Portal would be necessary.