You have 3 wishes and 3 days

[Ruffythepirate]

1. I wish that he was dead.
2. I wish that I had a delicious ice cream.
3. I wish that I have infinite wishes.

 

[Baby Tea]

I wish he was dead.
The fuck can he do to me if I've already wished him into oblivion?

But then you're dead.

If the guy gets more then you, then the idea is to wish yourself be hit be a car and almost killed. That way he'll get hit by a truck and totally killed. He always gets more, right? Then wish for money to pay for years of physiotherapy and recovery, and his more money will just goto his estate, which won't matter because he's dead. Then maybe wish for a robotic pony or something. Who cares by that point?

 

[Katherine Kerensky]

I'd wish for the power of transformation first.
Can't kill a target you don't know the appearance of.
Then I'd wish for access to technology far in advance of this planets current tech.
Final wish... ummm... pah, invincibility, why not? (Don't answer that one) >.>

 

[Abedeus]

Well, scenario one:

I want to be shot in the heart non-fatally. He would get shot fatally.

Scenario two:

I want someone to cut off one of my kidneys. He would have more than one cut out (either one and a piece, or both), he dies after a short time.

Scenario three:

I wish to know my enemy's name.
I say our my enemy's name and surname, then wish everyone with his exact name and surname was killed.

PROBLEM SOLVED. If it turns out I have the same name as he has, I would probably wish for changing his name to something else, then kill him. Still can be done in 3 wishes.

 

[Imperioratorex Caprae]

I would wish that I had a disease that was only slightly less than lethal just enough. Thus by the logic of Invader Zim, my enemy would have a better disease and thus die from it because his would be lethal.

"You made the fires worse!!!"
"Worse? Or better?"

 

[The Afrodactyl]

If he gets everything a bit more than I do, then I want to be beaten almost to death.

Then, with him dead, I use my wishes for material possessions.

 

[EHKOS]

I wish he would stay away from me for a few years...then a harem. And my last wish....hmmm prolly a gaming computer with a 2,000,000 Gigahert processor.

 

[Daverson]

I'd probably just murder my enemy using the tools already at my disposal, then use my first wish to get a bulletproof alibi, so no one will know it was me. Guess I'd use my other wishes for stuff. Like a massive yacht, with a cargo hold full of money. Or the Moon.

Or, for the pacifists, wish that my enemy was now my BEST FRIEND! =D

 

[Atmos Duality]

One of those "wishes with no solution" threads?
Sigh...I see these everywhere.

The whole point of the gig is to take the wish out of context. So the topic isn't about the wish at all, but about how you are going to die.

Besides, stating any non-scalable/absolute desire ("I wish I were Completely Indestructible") creates a paradox (Infinity isn't a stated value. Infinity+1 is included in the range of Infinity. Nevermind that infinity isn't actually a value, but a concept) when your "rival" tries to get one better.

Besides, I would create a time loop with my wishes. Just to drag that rival of mine into a perpetual Hell. Why? Because he's a jerk.

 

[Master Kuja]

I wish he was dead.
The fuck can he do to me if I've already wished him into oblivion?

But then you're dead.

If the guy gets more then you, then the idea is to wish yourself be hit be a car and almost killed. That way he'll get hit by a truck and totally killed. He always gets more, right? Then wish for money to pay for years of physiotherapy and recovery, and his more money will just goto his estate, which won't matter because he's dead. Then maybe wish for a robotic pony or something. Who cares by that point?

I was working by the logic that if he was already dead, he couldn't exactly get me killed, due to being dead and all, ergo his side of the deal would become null and void, but hell, your version makes a hell of a lot more sense.
Still painful mind you...

[small]Now excuse me while I go build a robotic pony.[/small]

 

[The Stonker]

I would wish that I had 4000 cans of pudding.
I would wish that I would get into a horrible car accident, but survive.
I would wish that I had the newest dark eldar models.
Win!

 

[Fantasylord]

Day 1: wish for a mild cold, enemy would be insanely sick by then
Day 2:Wish for peace for everybody on the freaking cosmos
Day 3 At this point my enemy would probably be dead from illness or at the very least bedridden and since everyone is peaceful the enemy's guard would be down then i would just find him offer to help him out by cooking him soup then poison him to death. Followed by my last wish to own a company that makes billions of dollars and runs itself thus making me incredibly wealthy and hopefully my mild cold is gone by then thus allowing me to live the sweet life.

 

[lockeslylcrit]

You have 3 wishes the wish will come true but whatever you wish for your enemy who hates you and will try to kill you will get more then you would for example u ask for money he would get more.

I wish that someone would beat me to an inch of my life.

One wish, I win.

 

[monkey_man]

i wish to donate a kidney (enemy dies)
and for 1000000000 dollars/euros whatev. (corpse gains 10000000000000000000000 euros/dollars)
and for immortality.(corpses cant gain immortality, because they died.)

I wish to donate a kidney. My enemy donates 2.

damn

Spoiler

 

[Elementlmage]

okay heres the same old story u have 3 wishes what do you wish for blah blah blah but

You have 3 wishes the wish will come true but whatever you wish for your enemy who hates you and will try to kill you will get more then you would for example u ask for money he would get more.

you ask for a Combat Mech and he gets one except his will be better. between each wish there has to be a 24 hour restriction so you cant use them all in the one day. More rules if you ask for eternal life or Invisibility he will counter it in and you have no idea who your enemy is. is it your best friend? Your teacher? your dog?

Extra stuff You cant wish for every thing they have to visibly possible.

You have 3 day to successfully survive and kill your enemy.

And how will you do it

Day 1, Health Insurance
Day 2, Benign, Operable, Brain Cancer
Day 3, wait a few months...
Day 180, Infinite wishes

 

[C95J]

my first wish is that I would be beaten half to death
he dies

then I am free to make more wishes without consequences

 

[Andreas55k]

wishes :

1. I want to be immortal
2. I want all evil propaganda against socialism to fade out of existence XD
3. I want for poverty to fade out of existence.

The immortal part saves me from the dude.. XD