"You want to know how i got these scars?" - Joker

[Ronwue]

You wanna know how I got these scars? I was dodging some vicious looking dogs by climbing an iron very ornate fence. I lost balance and fell... with the upper part of my leg into one of said very sharp ornaments. Barely missed my gnads and for that I am thankful.

 

[Onyx Oblivion]

You wanna know how I got these scars? In West Philadelphia, born and raised, on the playground is where I spent most of my days, chillin' out, maxin', relaxin' all cool, and shootin' some B-Ball outside of the school, when a couple of guys who were up to no good, started makin' trouble in my neighborhood, and then took a blade to my face when I tried to fight them.

 

[Mr. Moose]

These scars?
I got them whilst being ran over by a giant ninja polar armadillo wearing ice scates.
It hurt like hell.

 

[Graustein]

What scars?

 

[Eyclonus]

You see these scars on my face? My pretty little face here... You know those kind of story to them, a lesson if you will. You know what mum said to you when you little, waving those scissors about, "PUT THE SCISSORS DOWN OR YOU'LL TAKE AN EYE OUT WITH THAT THING".. Well My "BIG BROTHER" of sorts.. He started waving them round, and you see I was angry, he stole my cupcake.. So I reached out to take his.. and he waves them at me... But well you know.. Parents and mothers and all that interfering shit. So mumsy grabs my bros arm, he ain't happy with that so he starts a waving, and she's a screaming.. and hey little old me opens me mouth and suddenly I'm all smiling all the time... O'course my mother's gone ballistic the dogs in thick of it all what with all the barking and screaming and me brother there is just stunned like, mouth open like one of those.. CLOWNS eesh.. So I'm not happy. I take those scissors out of his hand and put them back in, except the wrong way. Now He starts screaming. so I take them out and try to pass them back, but he pushes me and I pretty much remove his fly... Mum being the helpful shit-faced C___ she is starts yelling at me, but the dog's hungry so I feed him the scrap meat on the floor, next to my brothers ketchup covered jeans.
Mum starts shaking me but I'm a good boy so I show the scissors nice and up close... and what do you know;

These things do take out eyes...

 

[Amnestic]

Want to know how I got these scars? I used to be a happy guy, just like you. I used to smile and laugh at everyone I met. One day, I met a group of guys who just didn't feel like smiling. They were "tough" guys, so they diodn't think it was right for a guy to smile. So they grab me. One of them takes a switch blade. "You know" he says "its your lucky day. Since you love smiling, we're gonna make it easier for you. We're gonna keep you smiling all the time. Make you look real beautiful" He sticks it in my cheek, just under the bones. The pain...was...lovely. So they dropped me, with the knife in my face. I felt I needed to return the favour. I take it out, and I let them feel the same delicious pain. But then, I felt my own face. Why, it wasn't done at all. I couldn't go around with only half a smile on my face. So I shoved the knife in my cheeks, and drew, along my teeth, a perfect smile. And now, look at me. Aren't I beautiful?

Absolutely freaking creepy Indingo.

 

[Xhumed]

Bobbing for razor-blade-laced apples.

 

[Haliwali]

Joe was always telling me to use the search button...

 

[Hookman]

"You want to know how I got these scars? well lets just say superman is a dick."
Oh by the way I looked up the term for those scars. The official term for the joker scars is
'a glasgow smile'

 

[Sgt. Dante]

Wanna know how i got these scars?

Pie-Sword

 

[jimClassic]

Joker: "Do you want to know how I got these scars?"
Batman: "I DON'T CARE"
Joker: "....OOkay...moving on then."

 

[TwilightFan182]

"You want to know how I got these scars? I, well, my father was a violent man. On my twenty-first birthday, we went to a bar together, and he got drunk, as he often does. I said something he apparently didn't like, and he pulled a knife on me. Oh, the pain was bliss! When he stopped, he dropped the knife on the bar counter, and had this shocked look on his face. So I picked the knife up and I asked him, 'Why so serious?' and then I put a smile on his face, too."

 

[SecretTacoNinja]

"You wanna know how I got these scars? I was Trick or Treating when I was young (dressed as a clown of course)... and Bruce Wayne's mom gave me a candy apple with a razor blade in it, that's why I killed his parents EEEEEYAHAHAHAHA!!!"

 

[TwilightFan182]

"You wanna know how I got these scars? I was Trick or Treating when I was young (dressed as a clown of course)... and Bruce Wayne's mom gave me a candy apple with a razor blade in it, that's why I killed his parents EEEEEYAHAHAHAHA!!!"

The Joker didn't kill Bruce Wayne's parents. He would have only been a kid then, himself. The Waynes' killer was a random thug named Joe Chill.

 

[Eyclonus]

"You wanna know how I got these scars? I was Trick or Treating when I was young (dressed as a clown of course)... and Bruce Wayne's mom gave me a candy apple with a razor blade in it, that's why I killed his parents EEEEEYAHAHAHAHA!!!"

The Joker didn't kill Bruce Wayne's parents. He would have only been a kid then, himself. The Waynes' killer was a random thug named Joe Chill.

Who did the stupidest thing in Gotham, cooperate with the police.

 

[SecretTacoNinja]

"You wanna know how I got these scars? I was Trick or Treating when I was young (dressed as a clown of course)... and Bruce Wayne's mom gave me a candy apple with a razor blade in it, that's why I killed his parents EEEEEYAHAHAHAHA!!!"

The Joker didn't kill Bruce Wayne's parents. He would have only been a kid then, himself. The Waynes' killer was a random thug named Joe Chill.

Really? I thought it was The Joker, huh, I'm not a huge fan of Batman.
It's only a lame joke anyway

 

[TwilightFan182]

It's all good. Just thought I'd correct you in case you are a Batfan. XD

"You want to know how I got these scars? Well, I don't trust you enough to tell you that. Open the social menu in the bottom corner of your screen by left-clicking on the little picture of the face, and make my disposition toward you go up."

"O...ok...ok... you're weird..."

Batman clicks on the face, and raises the Joker's disposition toward him to 99, and the effort costs him the batmobile and the deed to wayne manor...

"You still want to know how I got these scars, Bats? Well, I still don't want to tell you!"

 

[The Sorrow]

Wanna know how I got these scars?
Chainsaw juggling. I always smile when I do it.

 

[Samurai Goomba]

Wanna know how I got these scars?
By swinging around a broken pair of nunchucks with a jagged edge on one end (true story.)

Wanna know how I got these scars?
From trying to get an electronic item out of its hard plastic shell using a knife (again, true story.)

Wanna know how I got these scars?
By having a squirrel attack my hand with intent to murder it (another true story.)

 

[Eyclonus]

This thread is starting to depress me.

COME ON PEOPLE!! Show us some real psycho killer crazy shit not lame de-motivator quips. This is the escapist not 4Chan.