Your Daughter's Date is Picking Her Up For The Prom....
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I totally hear what you're saying dude.evilgrim said:
I know it's a huge risk, but I also think that women should be allowed to drive. That is what you're talking about, right......?
as tempting as it would be to reinact this scene
I honestly dont know what I would do. Probably just gt dressed in drag and answer the door
I honestly dont know what I would do. Probably just gt dressed in drag and answer the door
Demand to see the condom he sure as Hell better be carrying.
The Scary Dad occurs when I first meet him. It involves openly displayed and exotic oriental weaponry.
The Scary Dad occurs when I first meet him. It involves openly displayed and exotic oriental weaponry.
"You better have her home by eleven...not eleven o' 5 but eleven. If I found out you hurted her either physical or emo... I know 60 ways to dispose of a body."
When he says he's come to pick my her up I'd say "Ah, I remember when I was a young girl being taken to my prom." And continue along this line of thought until they leave. I'm a guy
Stare at him as I follow him round the house, but never make eye contact. Not once. Also, I will be holding a pineapple. Also, I will be wearing a stovepipe hat. Also, no trousers.
My plan:
Step 1: Rig an archery set to aim next to the door
Step 2: Rig a tripwire 3cm in front of the door (on the inside)
Step 3: When he arrives run in yelling 'HA, gotcha ya' damn punks!' *sees the 'miss* 'Dammit, you were lucky ... this time.'
Step 4: When I 'find out' that he is my daughter's date, I begin to act friendly, but in an overly-happy, creepy way.
Step 5: As they go to leave I warn him not to step on the grass because of the 'landmines', but do it in a friendly and non-chalant way.
I reckon that would mess with the kid's head.
Step 1: Rig an archery set to aim next to the door
Step 2: Rig a tripwire 3cm in front of the door (on the inside)
Step 3: When he arrives run in yelling 'HA, gotcha ya' damn punks!' *sees the 'miss* 'Dammit, you were lucky ... this time.'
Step 4: When I 'find out' that he is my daughter's date, I begin to act friendly, but in an overly-happy, creepy way.
Step 5: As they go to leave I warn him not to step on the grass because of the 'landmines', but do it in a friendly and non-chalant way.
I reckon that would mess with the kid's head.
Show the guy baby-pictures of my daughter for a full half-hour, then suddenly switch the subject to "Lord, it's hard to think she's all grown up and having sex..." just to see the two's reaction.
If she's old enough, it's her decision. Won't stop me being an embarassing dad, though.
If she's old enough, it's her decision. Won't stop me being an embarassing dad, though.
Hmm...
The Boondocks comes to mind, possibly this scene here with Riley being grounded.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ecURIzLknUw[/youtube]
0:52-0:56 would be fun.
In case the video doesn't show...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ecURIzLknUw
After the quick make out session between my daughter and the date, he opens the door...
FALCON KICK!
The Boondocks comes to mind, possibly this scene here with Riley being grounded.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ecURIzLknUw[/youtube]
0:52-0:56 would be fun.
In case the video doesn't show...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ecURIzLknUw
After the quick make out session between my daughter and the date, he opens the door...
FALCON KICK!
Man you kid are doomed if you do any of this for real. I had one father try this. The we head to the car. I jump behide the wheel locked her out and left her there. Next day at school I told everyone. Man she endded up a complete outcast to the point they had to move. Three bucks saids she never invited another guy to meet her dad.
Open a window close by so that he can hear what's going on inside and as soon as he rings the bell, stand behind the door in the vicinity of the window and shout: "THAT MUST BE YOUR DATE, HONEY!"
Open the door, say nothing and start laughing boisterously and while you're closing the door in front of him: "Ohh man, that is priceless," and leave the chap standing in front of a closed door.
If that isn't awkward for him, I don't know what is.
Open the door, say nothing and start laughing boisterously and while you're closing the door in front of him: "Ohh man, that is priceless," and leave the chap standing in front of a closed door.
If that isn't awkward for him, I don't know what is.
I actually had the chance to do this when some guy turned up to date my younger niece, when they were both 17. He was alone with me for a few minutes, and he turned to me and laughed and said "Thank god her dad's not here, or it'd be time for the third degree, huh?"
I smiled and said "That'd be my job. Now I'm not gonna threaten you or pretend I've got a gun or anything, kid, but do you have any younger family you love?"
"Yeah. I got a baby sister, she's 14."
"And what would you do if some deadbeat douchebag came and took her on a date, and fucked her?"
He puffed up, all manly "I'd fucking KILL him!"
"Right," I replied. "Then you know how I feel."
He brought her back home at an early time, and reports were he was a total gentleman all night. They're still dating three years later and he never so much as kissed her for the first several months.
I smiled and said "That'd be my job. Now I'm not gonna threaten you or pretend I've got a gun or anything, kid, but do you have any younger family you love?"
"Yeah. I got a baby sister, she's 14."
"And what would you do if some deadbeat douchebag came and took her on a date, and fucked her?"
He puffed up, all manly "I'd fucking KILL him!"
"Right," I replied. "Then you know how I feel."
He brought her back home at an early time, and reports were he was a total gentleman all night. They're still dating three years later and he never so much as kissed her for the first several months.
...I don't plan on having children at the moment. If I did, however, and it was the first time I'd met the young man...
*door opens* "Hi. You must be *xxx*. Meria's told me so much about you! Walgreens is open 'til midnight and they won't ID you tonight if you're with Meria." *suggestive wink* "Have fun, kids!"
All of this would be in front of the large bladed weapon collection I own.
*door opens* "Hi. You must be *xxx*. Meria's told me so much about you! Walgreens is open 'til midnight and they won't ID you tonight if you're with Meria." *suggestive wink* "Have fun, kids!"
All of this would be in front of the large bladed weapon collection I own.
