Your favourite joke!

[Blackadder51]

Massive snip

That joke was well worth it

OT: Uh,

Two guys walk in a bar

*bang* *bang*

Yes its shit

 

[Elemental]

This guy [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/profiles/view]

His face is soo ugly that is is hilarious.

Gee, thanks XD

 

[Batfred]

A couple of my favourite 2 liners:

What's brown and sticky?
A stick

What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot

Two fish in a tank. One says to the other
"How do you drive this thing?"

How do you make a dog drink?
Put one in a blender

 

[dsmops2003]

The difference between boogers and broccoli is kids dont eat broccoli

 

[MagnetoHydroDynamics]

I personally like math/science jokes.

Spoiler: Science jokes start at about 1:00

Spoiler: Schroedinger's ...

Schroedinger's Dishwasher: No one knows if the dishes are clean or not!
Schroedinger's Percolator: No one knows if it makes decaf or not!
Schroedinger's Toaster: No one knows if the toast is done...aren't all toasters like this?
Schroedinger's Toilet: No one knows if it has been flu......ewww
Schroedinger's Mailbox: Not approved by the postal service, to say the least.
Schroedinger's Vending Machine: It will eat your change. This is certain.
Schroedinger's Bullshit: No one knows if it is true.
Schroedinger's Shower: See "Second Degree Burns"
Schroedinger's Pregnancy Test: .....oh god....

 

[Jonesy911]

"Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world where what lies ahead is vague and uncertain. Doctor says 'Treatment is simple. Great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go and see him. That should pick you up.' Man bursts into tears. Says 'But, doctor...I am Pagliacci."

Good joke, everybody laughs

 

[dragonslayer32]

i recently got a job at a bowling alley but i dont get taxed, im only tenpin!

 

[Steveh15]

What did Hitler say to his troops before the largest tank battle of WW2?

Ok lads, get yourselves in those tanks then.


It's how I tell em.

EDIT: apparently how I tell them is with multiple spelling mistakes

 

[Chunklin]

*ahem*

Women's rights.

*Puts on sunglasses and grins*

 

[Player 2]

1.
An Irishman goes to a bakers and asks "is that a cake or a meringue?"

the baker says "no, your right, it's definitely a cake"

2.

A woman walks into a bar and asks for a double entendre. The barman gives her one.

 

[Tom13ombadil]

What does a dick and a Rubix cube have in common?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.

3 Black men jump off a roof. Who wins?
Society.

Did you hear about that tornado in Mexico?
1 house blew over and 1,000 mexicans died.

Sorry if you find these offensive. Please send me a message and I will take them down.

 

[Saul B]

This guy [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/profiles/view]

His face is soo ugly that is is hilarious.

EIPC SNIIIIIIIIIP

Wow. The had THE worst punchline of anything I have EVER read.......

 

[luke10123]

A girl in a bar said to me, "I wouldn't fuck you if you were the last person alive."

Leaning over and whispering, I replied, "But who would be around to stop me?"

Wiped the smug look off her face.

 

[Spitfire]

"Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world where what lies ahead is vague and uncertain. Doctor says 'Treatment is simple. Great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go and see him. That should pick you up.' Man bursts into tears. Says 'But, doctor...I am Pagliacci."

Good joke, everybody laughs

Just a matter of time I suppose.. untill someone posted this joke that is.

 

[Shurikens and Lightning]

I don't really have a favourite joke, so in stead I'm going to post the joke that has been scientifically proven to be the funniest joke in the world.
No really, they did the research on this one!

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says "OK, now what?"

SCIENCE!

Holy crap that's funny.

 

[Snork Maiden]

EIPC SNIIIIIIIIIP

Wow. The had THE worst punchline of anything I have EVER read.......

Total compliment.