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Private Custard

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Dec 30, 2007
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I had an insignificant post in the 'describe your sex life with a GLADos quote' thread.

then I went for the jugular in a thread on what the future holds for the Elder Scrolls.

Private Custard said:
I want:

1) More items, especially candles and lamps to decorate my house.

2) Some way to place items where I want them without worrying that the Havok physics engine is going to fling them all over the place if I look at them funny.

3) Skills. Longblade, shortblade, axe, spear etc etc etc... I hate the dumbing down of Oblivion, it spread to every aspect of the game and should have been sub-titled 'My First RPG'

4) All houses should be available to live in, without worrying about re-spawning crates etc... It's one of the things that made Morrowind brilliant, the ability to choose your own house.

5) New artifacts and special weapons, not just rip-offs from Morrowind. Oblivion stole, amongst other things, Azuras Star, Necromancers Amulet, Umbra......and on and on and on...

6) More spells. Again Oblivion failed on a massive scale. We want the fun spells, Jump, slowfall, levitate, mark, recall etc etc

7) The ability to wear clothes under armour and robes over the top, or just mix and match. Another of Oblivions fail points.

8) More unique dungeons and caves. So many of Oblivions caves were copy and paste jobs, crates were always found on the raised bits in the corners surrounded by stalagtites and stalagmites.

9) No more scaled levelling. To make it so you can take over the world as a level 1 character renders the entire levelling system null and void, meaning the game isn't full RPG. Remember in Morrowind when you accidentally made it to red mountain as a level 5 character and suddenly got worried for your safety?!

10) More easter eggs, things like Indiana Jones's note, the mudcrab merchant, the message in a bottle.............fishy sticks!! Things that make you want to go out and explore. Oblivion never offered much in the way of special items, and when it awarded them to you, it quite often wanted you to give them away to complete quests (garridans tears, artifacts etc..)

11) Armour - By the time you reach level 20+ in Oblivion, pretty much every bandit is wearing full elven, glass, and laughably, Daedric armour. What makes certain armours special is their exclusivity, I don't want 50 sets of Daedric in my storage chests!!

12) Draw distance - Yes Oblivion had good draw distance, but it didn't half make the world look small. If you're going to give a good draw distance, at least make places look far away.

13) Voice acting - Four words "Thank you kind sir" !! The voice acting was an epic fail. Martin was about as exciting as a coma and the rest of the population comprised of probably less than 15 different voices. The one ray of light was Sheogorath...............although I'm pretty certain the Sheogorath that speaks to you on the shrine quest is not the fake Scottish accented Sheogorath in SI!

14) AI - Just one example of laziness is the infinite arrows trick. Stand out the back of the Chorrol fighters guild when the Orc is doing his archery practice. Just keep taking his arrows off the target.............he'll never ask for them back!

15) Oblivion - If you can be bothered, try doing all the Oblivion gates, you'll soon realise that there are probably less than 10 individual 'Oblivions'. They repeated so often that I could guid a friend around them over voice chat!! This complaint could probably be lumped in with the repeating caves complaint I have.

16) Too much forest - the landscape had no variety, it was either mountains (with snow sometimes) or forests. Morrowind had Azuras Coast, The Ashlands, Mournhold, Solstheim (North and south), The Bitter Coast etc etc....

There's more, but I think Bethesda should know all this. Bethesda have seen what I did to my Morrowind save on the XBox, I had some contact via e-mail. They stopped talking to me when I told them Oblivion was a fail!!
Yep, in with a bang!!
 

XJ-0461

New member
Mar 9, 2009
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From a thread titled "No more music on Youtube":

it's moronic and isn't gonna work.


I'm not too proud of that.
 

Grayjack

New member
Jan 22, 2009
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Zero Punctuation: Awards for 2008

"I hope he reviews Persona 4 soon."

He never will review P4, right?
 
Feb 18, 2009
1,468
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Ah, my first step as an infant escapist. It was also my modest introductory post, after a fashion. From a thread called "What gets people to sleep?":

As a fellow sleepless one, I have been wondering the same thing; How do you guys get yourself to sleep. University has really screwed up my sleep-wake cycle. Usually I simply try to relax by reading or listening something soothing. Alcohol works well too (if self-control holds.)

Ravenbom:
But seriously, I was being only semi serious before, you need to make sure you never lay in bed if you can't sleep. Don't lay down if you can't go to bed. And definitely don't lay in bed if you can't sleep and you have a problem with it.
Actually, what I`ve heard is that just lying on the bed is important for your body to relax and get some rest. I´m not very convinced passing out from exhaustion is good for you, at least not in the long run. I could be wrong, though.

Oh, one more thing, off topic. As a first-time poster I´d like to say "Hi". OK, here goes: "Hi!" Please bear with me and my rusty english. It has been quite some time since I last had to use it. I´m polishing it as I go.


That was five aeons ago, last February. Such is the passage of time *sigh*.
 

DrDeath3191

New member
Mar 11, 2009
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Hoo boy. This won't go well:
Well, it was a thread on gay marriage.
"I agree that homosexuals should be treated equally, and have the same rights as everyone else. If a gay man and a gay woman want to get married to eachother, I see no problem with that."
 

New Troll

New member
Mar 26, 2009
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Thread was something like, "Best RPG you ever played"

New Troll said:
Computer = Planescape: Torment or Wizardry: Crusaders of the Dark Savant
Old School = Shining in the Darkness or Phantasy Star 2 or Super Hydlide
Next Gen = Fallout 3 (not like there's a ton of choices)
 

TMAN10112

New member
Jul 4, 2008
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Wow, that was pretty long ago.

Mine was back when Fallout 3 was inicially denied classification in Australia.


"I hate how the governmet can simply "refuse" to give a game a rating wich makes it illegle to sell just because they don't like something in it. Cencorship of game content (or the game itself) is wrong, and should be reformed or forcefully stopped. This is like how here in the U.S. when presedent bush refused to let the EPA(Enviormental Erotection Agency) help lower air polution reducing carbon emissions 6 parts per billion. The plan was stopped by simply refusing to open the email which the EPA sent containing it.

Maybe they could have gotten him to pay attencion in a way he could comprehend (like writing it on a birthday cake)."
 

similar.squirrel

New member
Mar 28, 2009
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"Peni [?] would be rendered pointless without some sort of goal. Not the most logical appendage, considering it's shape and vulnerability. Or the prettiest.

Wonder why it is that most animals have retractable versions...I shall not investigate further.

seriously, though..It's a biological imperative..same story with the female urge to bear children..
if we could bypass it, most of the world's problems could be solved..have these urges on tap, so to speak. Contraception is a start, despite what religious 'moralists' bleat.."

How very, very embarrassing. It was a thread dealing with the male obsession with sex.
 

SmilingKitsune

New member
Dec 16, 2008
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My first was on the "Most annoying obscure videogame characters" thread.

"I just finnished playing Killzone 2 and boy is Rico annoying, he's like all the meat heads from Gears of war wrapped into one."

And I stand by it, Rico actually made that game slightly less fun overall for me, jerk.
 

Golden Gryphon

New member
Jun 10, 2009
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My first post and my first thread. I'd lurked for long enough to know most escapists were fairly intelligent and wanted other people's opinions.

So about 4 years ago I read an article about the shortage of egg donors (and sperm donors but there's nothing I can do about that) and decided that, since I wasn't going to be using all or possibly any of them and the idea of someone finding me 18 years later didn't bother me, I would donate some of my eggs. Several of my aunts and uncles have had trouble conceiving and one of my cousins came from a donor egg so I feel like this is my way of helping other people in their situations.

I decided to wait until I was 20 so I had plenty of time to think about it and make a more mature decision. I turn 20 in less than a month and I definitely still want to do this but I would also like to hear other people's input. Obviously I've talked to family and friends but I figure the more people I talk to the better. I'd like, if possible, to hear from other donors and people who benefited from donations but anyone's opinion is welcome. Thanks.
 

Ridonculous_Ninja

New member
Apr 15, 2009
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Genre Wars Bug thread, I joined to play it, but I was lurking around here before that.

Ridonculous_Ninja said:
Everytime I follow the "issue a challenge link" from the pop up that comes up after you enter the warzone, it just keeps asking me to login, even when my information is still sitting in the box they provided to enter it in (firefox remembers what I put in there and sticks it in again). Also if anyone could tell me where I'm supposed to go to see opponents, that would really help me, I can only find where my stuff is >.>
It fixed itself in like 5 minutes after that post...
 

LeeHarveyO

New member
Jan 13, 2009
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Earliest Gaming Memories:

Ah lemme see...

Splatter house for the sega genisis, and altered beast those games rocked!
Oh and Duck hunt too for the NES.
 

Panzer_God

Welcome to the League of Piccolo
Apr 29, 2009
1,070
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Not a clue,
Edit:No really, my first post was I don't have a clue.
 

Guitar Gamer

New member
Apr 12, 2009
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from the all so very famous "do you own a gun? and if so why" thread

well those darn zombies aren't going to kill themselves are they? but on topic I would if I could but I can't

haven't changed much I'm proud to say
 

gmer412

New member
Feb 21, 2008
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I had lurked for a while before posting. Ah, it brings back memories...
gmer412 said:
1. Kefka. C'mon, he does ACTUALLY destroy the world
2. Ganon(dorf). He does too, in a lesser way
3. Silent Hill. It manifests your worst nightmares.

P.S. Not Bowser. Like Yahtzee said, he's even in your party in the RPGs. If he was always portrayed as completely evil, then I would go for it.
In a "best villain" thread.
 

darthzew

New member
Jun 19, 2008
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"EA says penises are fine, but no boobs please"

I don't know what to say here other than that I still don't like EA very much.

----

Not bad for a first post
 

Atvomat_Nikonov

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Jul 2, 2008
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I'd kill Roman Bellic. Mainly because he always rang me up in the middle of everything. He was a crap addition to the game and he had you doing crappy mission for the beginning of the game. I'd also probably kill the Adoring fan from Oblivion and Troy from Saints Row(This will probably happen in Saints Row 2 anyway though).
Surprisingly, this was my first post. I could've sworn it was something else though. Anyway, my first post was a hate-filled mini-rant about Roman Bellic. Oh, and the thread was called 'Video Game Characters that you would kill'.
 

Azraellod

New member
Dec 23, 2008
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didn't make mine until nearly a month after i joined. it was about what music you would listen to in battle.

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.81615?page=4#1119149

there.