I want my body creamated in my backyard, and my head shot out of a high pressure air cannon through some fool's window.
Your funeral.
- Thread starter Free Thinker
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I just want it to be cheap.
And no crummy relatives. You know, the ones that couldn't give a stuff while you were alive, and get all excited when you die because they fancy they might get something.
They won't. They're not even invited...
And no crummy relatives. You know, the ones that couldn't give a stuff while you were alive, and get all excited when you die because they fancy they might get something.
They won't. They're not even invited...
What? "Planned"?
Man, when I die, it is going to be a random suicide from nowhere and people are going to celebrate.
There won't be a funeral so much as a party and an uncerimonious dumping on the sidewalk.
If I get to plan it, though, viking burial all the way.
Hopefully I will have a kid or two by that point so I can get my son to push the boat off and fall face-first into the sand.
If not, I can always get a midget to do it.*
*[small]Sorry to any little people out there. I know it is wrong to make fun of you guys, but I make fun of everyone.[/small]
Man, when I die, it is going to be a random suicide from nowhere and people are going to celebrate.
There won't be a funeral so much as a party and an uncerimonious dumping on the sidewalk.
If I get to plan it, though, viking burial all the way.
Hopefully I will have a kid or two by that point so I can get my son to push the boat off and fall face-first into the sand.
If not, I can always get a midget to do it.*
*[small]Sorry to any little people out there. I know it is wrong to make fun of you guys, but I make fun of everyone.[/small]
I want a wake and a solemn funeral filled with friends and family talking about how great I was, crying and comforting each other. Then, I want them to go out, drink and f-ck so they can get all the sad crap out of their system!
Remember me with tears and debauchery.
Remember me with tears and debauchery.
I don't know why, I've always wanted to be cremated. After reading some of the awesomeness in this thread, my mind is spinning with ideas. Viking funeral, and halfway out into the water, it turns out my there are fireworks in there with me, some of which is me. Best of both worlds.
I'll probably just do something boring like have my body donated to science or something so some med student could carve me up and be all like "Oh...THAT'S what a gall bladder looks like."
I occasionally think of really outlandish (read: creepy as fuck) things to do though. Let's say I'm a millionaire, have my body roasted and cooked. Then have it written into my will that my assets will be split evenly among the funeral goers who eat at least a quarter pound of my cooked flesh so that I can "always be with them" or for some other arbitrary stupid reason.
If no one can stomach it, all of my money gets donated to a wildlife preserve (which is probably what I will actually end up doing).
...See this is probably why I have no friends
I occasionally think of really outlandish (read: creepy as fuck) things to do though. Let's say I'm a millionaire, have my body roasted and cooked. Then have it written into my will that my assets will be split evenly among the funeral goers who eat at least a quarter pound of my cooked flesh so that I can "always be with them" or for some other arbitrary stupid reason.
If no one can stomach it, all of my money gets donated to a wildlife preserve (which is probably what I will actually end up doing).
...See this is probably why I have no friends
"I'd like to be buried by them"Aylaine said:How could you confuse those? O_O!Angerwing said:That seriously needs to be reworded. When I first read it, I thought you meant a zombie burial. I now realise you mean you would like to be buried next to them.Aylaine said:I'd like to be buried by my other loves ones who have passed away.
Can mean either buried next to them, or more commonly, have them bury you.
I've already donated my body to science. I don't want any sort of funeral, but I don't suppose I'd be able to stop them if they tried.
No problem. I figured it out pretty quickly, but when I first read I was like "That idea is both unfeasible and horrifying."Aylaine said:Ahh, I see. Sorry for confusing you. xDAngerwing said:"I'd like to be buried by them"Aylaine said:How could you confuse those? O_O!Angerwing said:That seriously needs to be reworded. When I first read it, I thought you meant a zombie burial. I now realise you mean you would like to be buried next to them.Aylaine said:I'd like to be buried by my other loves ones who have passed away.
Can mean either buried next to them, or more commonly, have them bury you.
1st cremate me after selling my body art and donating the rest of my organs. 2nd (I realize it's an old joke but I don't care) I want somebody to say "Look, he's moving!!!" 3rd... if this is possible, I would like to have somebody put my skin on a robot so my "body" would actually move...just because. Other than that, I don't really care as long as nobody gives my body to necrophiliacs than I won't be haunting anybody....hmm, also, throw in some virtual intelligence like the hologram from "I, Robot" so it could talk to people using my voice.
Let's see. I want "Hell's Bells" to be played at my funeral. As for the actual details, I don't know.