Your useless superpower

[balanovich]

To change my metabolism at will. Anything to eat unhealthy food without gaining weight.

That's usefull!

To make my hair grow 100 faster at will. (and nails why not )

 

[Lord Beautiful]

The power to suggest use of the Search Bar.

oooo edgy wit there

I know, I know. Bad post. Still, there was a topic made just like this one this morning. I've never been a Search Bar Nazi, but come on, people!

 

[Yeq]

The power to talk to the dead. But only people who are insufferably dull.

 

[HoodedPunhist]

I can make people claw their eyes out by undressing myself in front of them. It's super effective!

 

[Antitonic]

Tele-apathy. The power to not care from miles away.

 

[Lim3]

The ability to tie shoe laces with my toes. Sadly if my toes are in said shoes then i would have to use my hands.

 

[Palindromemordnilap_v1legacy]

The ability to sense cheese but only using my toenails and only if the cheese is refrigerated

 

[Lim3]

The power to talk to the dead. But only people who are insufferably dull.

You can talk to the dead. But only accountants from the 1800s.

 

[dietpeachsnapple]

The power to read my own mind.

You sir, win some internets with this one.

OT:

The power to turn an inanimate object into a human for 60 seconds.

 

[ionpulse2]

My power would be to turn into a tree. Nothing else. Just a tree. Not the get up and walk and talk kind either. Just a normal tree.

 

[MrDeano89]

immunity to helium!

 

[MrDeano89]

The power to read my own mind.

You sir, win some internets with this one.

OT:

The power to turn an inanimate object into a human for 60 seconds.

that would actually be quite cool

 

[UAProxy]

The ability to sparkle slightly in direct sunlight, because apparently chicks dig it.

In actuality, I would kill myself if that were the case.

 

[Eggsnham]

I can create and destroy worlds at my whim, I have the potential to be invincible, to have infinite knowledge, to be able create life itself, but I can only use it 1000 years from the date of my birth, not before. Otherwise I am a normal Joe Schmoe and have a normal life expectancy.

 

[GreyFox389]

The ability to reseal soda cans and bottles I've already opened.

 

[Joe Matsuda]

the ability to make sticky goop from the hands

oh wait...

damn you, x-men!

 

[Headless Zombie]

I would have telekinesis that only works on cats.

 

[Composer]

"YOUR SHIRT IS RED!"
-Betty, Kung Pow

I would like to be able to change the color of mundane objects, shirts, mugs, pencils, etc.

you are my hero.

 

[CartoonHead]

"YOUR SHIRT IS RED!"
-Betty, Kung Pow

Haha, I remember that film! I must watch that again soon. Thanks for reminding me about it!

OT: the super-ability to read and follow Ikea furniture instructions (I'm male).

EDIT: Damn, Ninja'd with the quote.