You're drinking right now aren't you?

[calingido]

Stealing money. No, not by picking pockets or anything, but becoming friends with a group who offers me some cash to buy the next round then making friends with another group at the bar who then buys the round of drinks. On my best night I walked away with $82 (I don't know where the $2 came from, I must have stolen a tip). The funny thing is this always happens at dive bars, I am gainfully employed, and sadly probably make more $$ than the poor saps I take it from. I can't help being so damn charming!

Oh and defensive talent - always being able to make it home. I've woken up in my bed, in pajamas, with a glass of water waiting on the nightstand without a clue as to how I got there in the first place. Drunk me is such a team player.

 

[uchi mata]

I have the ability to Sober up and not aquire hangovers.

When the situation demands it, I step up to the plate as

SOBER MAN!

Can I start a creepy fan base around you Soberman

 

[Sparcrypt]

The ability to appear 100% dead sober for short periods of time - I can be completely and utterly off my head drunk but I can always hide it long enough to get into bars/clubs.

One time I downed an entire bottle of sambuka in 20 minutes flat, then we went out on the town (was my 'omg I got dumped lets get hammered night'). By the time we reached town I was gone.. however the night went as thus:

Bar 1: got in the door no worries, had a few beers, some guy spilled his drink at me and I punched him into a table - kicked out.
Bar 2: as I was walking in the bouncer suddenly said 'wait a minute, how much have you had?' my response of yelling 'you mum' earned me a swift exit.
Bar 3: again no problems at the door, however 4 steps into the place I proceeded to pass out and collapse on a bar stool, destroying it in the process.

I don't remember anything past that but the next 2 bars were pretty similar before we gave up and went home from what I've been told.

I also have the uncanny ability to never get hangovers - drives my friends insane.

 

[Sexual Harassment Panda]

I'm funnier...

More true than interesting.

 

[Lula21]

I get the ability to laugh at everything or even nothing at all. I get a serious case of the giggles when I'm drunk.

Oh, and the ability to tell people all sorts of things I probably would be too embarrassed to say sober.

I might test those abilities later tonight actually...

 

[SpaceSpork]

Dude, I've, like, been drinking so much fucken water man. I'm so h2drunk hahahaha!

 

[Icarion (aka Stockholm)]

Never have been drunk but one time I was so tired I could barely think. At that point I became really good at conpiracy theories. I mean really the paranoid stoner in me comes out when I'm really tired

 

[Chrinik]

I usually don´t get hangovers due to cunning pre planning of drinking water before going to bed.

When drunk, I usually keep my attitude (albeit getting a little more frisky), my ability to articulate and I can keep myself from slurring and stumbling about, also keeping my ability to think rationally, which deals with the above hangover issue. Which is why alot of cops said that I am sober, despite having about 1.5 promille intus. I had to ASSURE them that I was drunk as to not mistreat me, but that I was fine, as they could see.

 

[PayneTrayne]

When I'm drunk, I have the magnificent ability to hold my liquor. I've thrown up once from drinking too much, that was my birthday. One day was food poisoning, the other was just too much foam not enough burp.

I can roll 13 beer deep and get a decent buzz, but that's it. It sucks, I've got too much flab.

 

[dex-dex]

Well i don't get too drunk because usually i watch people to see that they are not making moves on exes or people who are in relationships.

i would be drunk now but i have a test that is worth fifteen percent of my grade tomorrow at eight in the morning. EW!!! and thne ig et to wax my cousin's junk for a grade for brazillian. YAAAY!

 

[Snotnarok]

I've only been fairly buzzed, never made it to drunk. My "outer family" keeps me from ever reaching that by being booze and drug abusers. I don't mean users, I mean abusers and it's just not something I want to ever be similar to.

Positive thoughts! Uh, well I came off of general anesthetic after surgery and couldn't see anything more than blobs but I was very aware despite everything being unseeable.

 

[nick n stuff]

TALKING REALLY LOUD WITHOUT MEANING TO!!!!

 

[DirgeNovak]

I'm not drunk, I only had five, six, uh... seven... nine... oh fuck it, I'm drunk.

 

[Kuroneko97]

I have never been drunk. Never drunken alchohol. Anyone not too drunk to tell me what it's like?

 

[Lyri]

Can I start a creepy fan base around you Soberman

You may, Creepy kid.

 

[USSR]

Being the designated driver, and therefore not drunk.

Right there with ya.

 

[Sporky111]

I have never gotten a hangover, and I can always remember pretty much everything that happened during the drunkeness. But, take into account that I've never been drunk enough to throw up, which seems to be some kind of milestone.

Also, while inebriated I become extremely tuned into any kind of music. If I know the words, I sing along regardless of who is around. If I don't know the words, I just dance. If there isn't music, I'll usually sing whatever pops into my head.

 

[SturmDolch]

The drunker I am, the more attractive I am to the ladies ;D

...

Right?

 

[UnbakedParrot]

Wow, how right you are! My friends are playing beer pong and I'm drinking a delicious glass of Patron XO Cafe. I love this shit.

 

[smithy_2045]

Apparently I yell when I'm drunk. Which is strange coz normally I'm incredibly quiet!