You've Created A Nation, Now To Declare War!
- Thread starter shadowstriker86
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why would I do that? I already have my perfect nation, I don't particularly like this world very much anyway and I doubt a global war would improve it very much. I'll just sit up there watching the rest of the world fuck itself up while i eat cherry pie. maybe I'll get a big magnifying glass and burn some people from high orbit for shits and giggles.
I just came up with this strategy, and it can't possibly be beaten:
I invade poorly defended regions around the equater.
Then my forces will hold all the rainforests hostage.
The world will have to surrender to my rule, or suffer the consequences, muhahahah!!!
Alternatively, I could muster my armies and wage war against the ocean, maybe have it lashed as punishment for resisting me. Then, my soldier will claim many shells from the beach as their rightfull spoils of war!!!!
I invade poorly defended regions around the equater.
Then my forces will hold all the rainforests hostage.
The world will have to surrender to my rule, or suffer the consequences, muhahahah!!!
Alternatively, I could muster my armies and wage war against the ocean, maybe have it lashed as punishment for resisting me. Then, my soldier will claim many shells from the beach as their rightfull spoils of war!!!!
You're post gave me hours of wiki-ing fun, thank you!.FolkLikePanda said:
I, Lord of Galicia here-by claim the lands of Portugal as my own and hear-by declare war on all nations for the independence of and re-reinstatement of the following countries, organisations and Dynasties.
Riga, The free city of Danzig, Leon, Castille, Aragon, Sicily, Andalucia, the Teutonic Knights, the Hapsburg Dynasty, The Jagiellon Dynasty, Norththumberland, Cornwall, Byzantium, The Crimean khanate, Pskov, Novgorod, Tver, Burgundy and some others i am sure.
I would claim Cuba as my own.
And since I am a magic floating sky kingdom I shall simply bombard Cuba with spam mail, then cats and finally trains until they give into my demands.
Then when Cuba is under my control I shall come down hard on the exportation of cigars, thus depriving the world of fine Cuban cigars. When the world slowly eats through it's remaining supply of Cuban cigars and grows needy for more I shall start selling some on the side at a greatly inflated price, making millions!
I will also use spies to place listening devices and trackers on the pets of powerful political figures across the world and make a TV show out of the recordings, just because.
And since I am a magic floating sky kingdom I shall simply bombard Cuba with spam mail, then cats and finally trains until they give into my demands.
Then when Cuba is under my control I shall come down hard on the exportation of cigars, thus depriving the world of fine Cuban cigars. When the world slowly eats through it's remaining supply of Cuban cigars and grows needy for more I shall start selling some on the side at a greatly inflated price, making millions!
I will also use spies to place listening devices and trackers on the pets of powerful political figures across the world and make a TV show out of the recordings, just because.
The State of the Teutonic Order. Those bastards have ruined one too many of my EU3 games. Hey, you never said the country had to still exist.
Italy and I choose a group of hooligans. A bit overpowered considering the ineptitude of the Italian military but it's hard to go lower than pre-industrial Ethiopia.
Invade France first ('cuz payback is a bi-atch) then England.
I wouldn't actually attack the UK, just manufacture several tons of el-cheapo Sten SMGs + ammo and parachute them into London. When the city is in a total wreck, I'd order a Black Operation to finish what Guy Fawkes started, on an actual Guy Fawkes Night. Then I'd meet with the royal family and tell them "I fixed it this time, don't ever let *THAT* happen again!".
Then to prove how serious I am, I'd shout "I'll smack you all bitches if I have to tell you twice!"
Seems legit.
I wouldn't actually attack the UK, just manufacture several tons of el-cheapo Sten SMGs + ammo and parachute them into London. When the city is in a total wreck, I'd order a Black Operation to finish what Guy Fawkes started, on an actual Guy Fawkes Night. Then I'd meet with the royal family and tell them "I fixed it this time, don't ever let *THAT* happen again!".
Then to prove how serious I am, I'd shout "I'll smack you all bitches if I have to tell you twice!"
You mean invading a country that is a gigantic fortress with mortar and artillery positions dug inside mountains, can't be invaded by sea, has a terrain capable of bottlenecking any invasion by land vehicles and that has like 420,000 fully automatic SIG SG 550 assault rifles in their households plus 300,000 semi automatic SIGs in civilian ownership?Fiz_The_Toaster said:
Seems legit.
First off, the Grand Army Of Gone Rampant would send a tactical airstrike (Or a hundred) into Nigeria. That'll teach those spam emailing fuckers.
Then I'll give FOX the remains so I can say I blew them up, then I'll take Europe through democracy. Because it's a RECESSION. I'm not gonna waste the budget of the continent I'm invading, that's stupid. Then I'll set up over Europe and use my top scientists to make decent spacecraft and cure some random stuff.
Then I'll give FOX the remains so I can say I blew them up, then I'll take Europe through democracy. Because it's a RECESSION. I'm not gonna waste the budget of the continent I'm invading, that's stupid. Then I'll set up over Europe and use my top scientists to make decent spacecraft and cure some random stuff.
I'd establish good trade relations with the U.S. and possibly the U.K. to secure allies, then I'd go after China. Once I take over China, I'll call off all debts that other countries had accrued.
For tactics, I would attack their main military facilities, including ammunition factories and weapons R&D laboratories with high-level bombardments using Howitzers and standard smart bombs to soften them up, the send down heavily armed gunships and shock troops to finish them off. Surrender will be accepted and all prisoners will be treated as humanely as possible.
For tactics, I would attack their main military facilities, including ammunition factories and weapons R&D laboratories with high-level bombardments using Howitzers and standard smart bombs to soften them up, the send down heavily armed gunships and shock troops to finish them off. Surrender will be accepted and all prisoners will be treated as humanely as possible.
Problem would be launching the nuke without the US knowing, prevent it from getting shot down, and actually covering the whole American territory with the pulse (you'd need a few nukes for good measure).theblindedhunter said:
Then you'd have the country's most important electronics shielded against EMPs, the fact that "Faraday Cages" would prevent everything from being cooked and that older technology is nearly immune to EMP. Example: a Faraday Cage can be a metal cage (must be continuous, no gaps) of any thickness that will protect electronics inside. While copper wires would defeat the purpose of a Faraday Cage, optic fiber can go trough it. Even if most of the electronics in America are not shielded against an EMP, replacement parts at hand could bring the systems back online in a jiffy.
Imagining you could defeat the Army, the Marine Corps, Air Force, Navy, Coast Guard and National Guard, you'd still have ~300 million firearms in circulation and an area of 10 million square kilometers to secure.
No, no, the Swiss Guard and the Vatican police force both have guns. Lots of them. You'll need a more effective strategy than simple range.Quaxar said:
Switzerland.
My flying country trumps their mountainous defences, and lets see them remain neutral now.
Afterwards, North Korea and depose the Kims, then Africa to kill all the warlords to bring stability and sustainable crops, then Brazil for it's natural resources and coffee, and then the world!
In all seriousness I don't think I'd really need to declare war on anyone. We would be a freelance exporter of our antigrav technology in limited sizes, with a global patent on it. We would swoop down from the skies, mowing down brutal dictators and evil people.
Also, galactic travel.
My flying country trumps their mountainous defences, and lets see them remain neutral now.
Afterwards, North Korea and depose the Kims, then Africa to kill all the warlords to bring stability and sustainable crops, then Brazil for it's natural resources and coffee, and then the world!
In all seriousness I don't think I'd really need to declare war on anyone. We would be a freelance exporter of our antigrav technology in limited sizes, with a global patent on it. We would swoop down from the skies, mowing down brutal dictators and evil people.
Also, galactic travel.
Through a combination of bribery, misdirection and outright lies I would create a proxy war between all other nations and let them do the work for me. Then out of the ashes, my own empire will rise, and I shall declare myself Supreme Overlord of Terra*
BTW I'm renaming earth to Terra, cos it sounds cooler and I own it now.
BTW I'm renaming earth to Terra, cos it sounds cooler and I own it now.