Zero Punctuation: Assassin's Creed IV: Black Flag

[Carnagath]

Uhhh, ok, if you haven't played AC3 yet, DO NOT WATCH THIS. At least warn people before you spoil the fuck out of something THAT major, Jesus Christ...

It's AC4, common sense should dictate not to watch it if you want to know what happened in AC3. No spoiler warning needed unless he's spoiling AC4 story.

Are you serious right now? I'm not watching a Let's Play or a plot analysis video, I'm watching a comedic review, there is absolutely no reason for him to spoil something THAT major, from the exactly previous game, just so he can make one more joke. At the very least, he should have the courtesy to warn people before spoiling THE FUCKING ENDING. Even 4chan would spoiler tag that shit. It's baffling that I actually have to justify my annoyance, like, really?

Uhhh, ok, if you haven't played AC3 yet, DO NOT WATCH THIS. At least warn people before you spoil the fuck out of something THAT major, Jesus Christ...

I haven't, and have no plans to play Assassin's Creed 3, but I'm considering eventually getting this game if it's good. Do you think it's cool if I watch the video then? I don't know what's being spoiled exactly, so I'm not sure how much it'll matter.

Well of course, if you have no plans to play AC3, go ahead.

 

[Banzaiman]

Saw the ad for Deadrising 3 before Yahtzee's clip. And now I'm sad.

OT: AssCreed needs to stop calling itself that, because really at this point I think the series has stopped caring about how the order fits into everything and would rather just watch important people fire cannons and go ARR. I'd like it a lot more if it stopped trying to keep the pretense of a coherent story and just proudly proclaim that it exists simply to visit various periods in history.

Also, the "ta-da!" bit was my favorite part of this episode. Spot on there Yahtzee.

 

[Enlong]

Saw the ad for Deadrising 3 before Yahtzee's clip. And now I'm sad.

OT: AssCreed needs to stop calling itself that, because really at this point I think the series has stopped caring about how the order fits into everything and would rather just watch important people fire cannons and go ARR. I'd like it a lot more if it stopped trying to keep the pretense of a coherent story and just proudly proclaim that it exists simply to visit various periods in history.

Also, the "ta-da!" bit was my favorite part of this episode. Spot on there Yahtzee.

Actually, wasn't that part of the point of the story? For most of it, Edward doesn't realy live by any sort of creed; just looking out for himself and his own profit. A fair bit of the story is people saying that he needs to find something bigger than that (like the Assassin Order, perhaps, or the Templars) to tie himself to.

Though, this does have the effect of making the game basically Pirate's Creed for a lot of the plot.

Uhhh, ok, if you haven't played AC3 yet, DO NOT WATCH THIS. At least warn people before you spoil the fuck out of something THAT major, Jesus Christ...

It's AC4, common sense should dictate not to watch it if you want to know what happened in AC3. No spoiler warning needed unless he's spoiling AC4 story.

Are you serious right now? I'm not watching a Let's Play or a plot analysis video, I'm watching a comedic review, there is absolutely no reason for him to spoil something THAT major, from the exactly previous game, just so he can make one more joke. At the very least, he should have the courtesy to warn people before spoiling THE FUCKING ENDING. Even 4chan would spoiler tag that shit. It's baffling that I actually have to justify my annoyance, like, really?

Uhhh, ok, if you haven't played AC3 yet, DO NOT WATCH THIS. At least warn people before you spoil the fuck out of something THAT major, Jesus Christ...

I haven't, and have no plans to play Assassin's Creed 3, but I'm considering eventually getting this game if it's good. Do you think it's cool if I watch the video then? I don't know what's being spoiled exactly, so I'm not sure how much it'll matter.

Well of course, if you have no plans to play AC3, go ahead.

This isn't exactly a new thing. He spoiled the last few moments of Brotherhood near the start of his review of Revelations. His statute of limitations appears to expire for the sequel. Note that he pointedly didn't spoil the ending of ACIII during his review of ACIII.


On the subject of romanticizing pirates, I feel like it actually paints a somewhat less romanticized view than some other works.

Spoiler

We see the whole "Pirate Democracy" on Nassau collapse under a haze of booze, apathy, and illness from total lack of medicine, piracy is shown to be less profitable than slavery, Blackbeard moves to retire and take the King's pardon, and Kenway's crew becomes more and more disillusioned with him as he continues to chase the big treasure and adventure.

 

[Incomer]

Uhhh, ok, if you haven't played AC3 yet, DO NOT WATCH THIS. At least warn people before you spoil the fuck out of something THAT major, Jesus Christ...

You've got to be joking. I mean seriously... review for the next game in the series should have a bloody green light for spoiling things from its predecessor.

 

[Sansha]

All I heard from this was 'Desmond dies', and I pretty much immediately ran out to pre-order my copy.

 

[Sheo_Dagana]

I have to agree with Yahtzee and many others - the sailing is what really makes this game for me. It's not repetitive, somehow, and just makes the world feel larger than it really is. There's nothing like fighting off three ships at once and crippling them all so you can board them one by one and steal their shit. Being a pirate was just all kinds of adventurous.

Speaking of adventurous, I have to say that I don't mind the new direction the present-day story has gone. I always felt like I was playing a game about a guy playing video games (who seemed completely uninterested in the stories of his ancestors) so I might as well be playing a game about me playing a game.

 

[bluegate]

Ugh, I absolutely hate the tailing missions in these games, same goes for the walk with some random bloke who tells you some random crap while doing some badly animated stuff. Those missions are such major time wasters and take you out of the game that seriously, I don't get why they keep jamming them in.

Also, the combat in these games, when is it gonna get any good? It's been about standing around waiting to get attacked and counter since the first game now, when is the fighting gonna get good or challenging....

Glad to hear that desmond is out of the picture, guy had the appeal of a wet dishrag. Worst character in what might be one of the most overrated franchises this generation.

 

[Canadamus Prime]

This series is yet another example of neither the fans nor the Publishers/Developers knowing when a franchise needs to be laid to rest.

I think the basic premise of free-running around historical periods we don't often see in games is still interesting and rife for a lot more exploitation. It's the stupid framing story with Abstergo and the aliens that just gets sillier and sillier.

Then perhaps they should start a new IP with the same premise of free running around historical periods, but without the idiotic framing device.

This series is yet another example of neither the fans nor the Publishers/Developers knowing when a franchise needs to be laid to rest.

Is it popular? Is it making a lot of money? Then it isn't time to lay it to rest. Even if you disagree. Keep in mind, you're talking with someone that got bored in Asscred 1 to the point I haven't played since. But I'm not going to lay around bemoaning how awful Ubisoft is for making a product that other people want and will pay money for. It's incredibly self-centered to claim that something is over just because you and whoever else says it is. Not when the numbers present otherwise.

Assassin's Creed 3 sold over 5 million copies on the ps3, 4.6 million on the 360, and whatever pittance more on the pc, not including the Vita version that sold around 800k units.

So, over 10 million people bought this game's predecessor. That's on par with Assassin Creed 1's numbers and that's been out since 2007 so this one has that many more years to go.

Assassin's Creed 2 was relatively close with fewer sales on the pc.

However, I will contribute that Asscreed IV's sales are about a third of what III was, this is either a sign of some drastic downturn in sales after an increase in quality or is a result of it coming out on ps4/XBO soon enough.

Either way, at this moment telling Ubisoft to "stop selling this game" would be a lot like telling a hotdog stand owner to stop selling hotdogs because they're so common. Both groups response could easily be: "But, people like them and pay good money for them and I'm a business."

A franchise still being popular and selling well is not a good enough reason to keep it going esp. when it's begun to stagnate. IDK, I've never actually played an Assassin's Creed game, but if Yahtzee thinks this franchise has gone on too long then it'd be just one of many that have done so. Not that what Yahtzee thinks is the be all and end all of course.

 

[Sansha]

Uhhh, ok, if you haven't played AC3 yet, DO NOT WATCH THIS. At least warn people before you spoil the fuck out of something THAT major, Jesus Christ...

You're implying that Desmond is in any way a remotely interesting enough character to hide his plot revelations from people.

 

[Neurotic Void Melody]

Those bloody tailing missions, i swear every story mission started with a tailing prod. In fact i am even stuck on a particular one right now. Fuck you tails! And yes i mean that friend of sonic too, with his whiny, high maintenance bullshit!
Gimme that stapler!

Tails I can deal with. just please answer me this: Are there any escort quests?

I do not remember any such quests. So thats alright

THANK GOD. I've been playing a bunch of games lately with excessive escort quests, aggravating me to the point of turning off the game outright. "You need to keep this guy alive, but he's going to run blindly headfirst into a minefield/zombie horde/hot lava/etc..."

If I were a designer I'd fire anyone who offered one as an idea, and if I were a reviewer each game presenting me one would be docked multiple points on the spot.

Yes, babysitting characters in any game is goddam awful! Unless its Elizabeth from bioshock infinite, transdimentional powers are always welcome.
Otherwise, its like lookin after a smugly self aware tamagochi. And at least you could let them die if you wanted!

 

[GAunderrated]

AC3 was it for me - I'm done with this series. As someone who still thinks AC1 is the best game of the series because it was actually about assassinating people and not being Forrest Gump to history - it's clear they are not making games for me anymore. Plus it's clear they have no plans whatsoever to write a story with a satisfying conclusion, either in the past or the present.

The story hasn't made me excited since AC2. I've been playing it for the gameplay and even that is getting old.

 

[Cid Silverwing]

Wow... 22 comments and not a single person talking about the Heath Ledger reference?

I'm honestly shocked.

I don't know whether to laugh or be offended myself. I don't really like the Dark Knight trilogy anyway.

 

[Reed Spacer]

Glad to hear AC IV is a fecking awesome game and Yahtzee likes it.

I've always gotten the opinion that he doesn't so much 'like' a game as find only a few reasons not to.

 

[FallenMessiah88]

I really need to catch up with the Assassins Creed series. Why? Because I really like pirates.

 

[Kargathia]

Uhhh, ok, if you haven't played AC3 yet, DO NOT WATCH THIS. At least warn people before you spoil the fuck out of something THAT major, Jesus Christ...

Admittedly, now I feel like I maybe shouldn't've quit ACIII when the story was about to splurt badly written climactic ending on my face like I was a $5 hooker.

Well, it'd still spill its unsavoury load all over me, but at least I could do a little victory dance over the corpse of -SPOILER-, because really, fuck that guy.

 

[Extragorey]

Once again, he complains about dodgy ledge detection, but I've actually noticed that the series has fixed that pretty nicely since the first game - now any hopping between close ledges or rooftops is done by holding only the RMB, and larger leaps (like off the building) are only executed if you hold down the spacebar as well. This system has worked well in the Ezio trilogy and AC3, so I see no reason AC4 will have backtracked.

Anyway, it's good to hear that the freeform sailing and naval warfare works well - that was one of my main concerns. I preordered AC4 weeks ago anyway, because I always enjoy the freedom of parkour gameplay it offers and each new setting brings enough variety to the table to keep me engaged. A shame the PC release is delayed once more, but I know it'll put the console versions to shame so I'm not too annoyed about it.

 

[bug_of_war]

Yeah, this franchise is a huge cash cow at this point, but generally the entries are well crafted & polished, running through historical locations and stuff is consistently fun and the campaign always gives you bang for the buck. I guess my point is... well, good, keep 'em coming, please.

Yeah, I don't see a problem with a game being milked for all it's worth if the subsequent sequels are actually good. Had AC4 for a while and it is fucking amazing. Great game, can't wait for AC5!

 

[Kenbo Slice]

Wow... 22 comments and not a single person talking about the Heath Ledger reference?

I'm honestly shocked.

I don't know whether to laugh or be offended myself. I don't really like the Dark Knight trilogy anyway.

Trilogy? When did they make a third one?

OT: I'm glad he enjoyed it, it's a fun game and Edward is a cool guy, way better than Connor.

 

[Sansha]

... actually about assassinating people and not being Forrest Gump to history...

Out-fucking-standing, Comment of the Thread. This is the most succinct summary of the AC progression I've ever seen. Excellent wordplay, sir.

 

[Sansha]

Wow... 22 comments and not a single person talking about the Heath Ledger reference?

I'm honestly shocked.

I don't know whether to laugh or be offended myself. I don't really like the Dark Knight trilogy anyway.

Trilogy? When did they make a third one?

OT: I'm glad he enjoyed it, it's a fun game and Edward is a cool guy, way better than Connor.

The one with Bane; Dark Knight Rises.