Zero Punctuation: Eve Online

[bazooka_joe]

On subject tho... I enjoy EVE just as much as I enjoy this review. That should leave you something to ponder on for awhile

I agree. It's a great review from the perspective of the casual player who doesn't want to talk to other players in the EVE universe. All true what he said.

However, I've been playing EVE for 2 months now and as I see it - older players are literally enlisting trials; it seems unbelievable, but we all know that fresh blood keeps the universe (and the market!) running. So, just like Yahtzee said - it's like having a second job you have to pay for...
Unless... Unless You make 300 mil. ISK in a few days to buy yourself a 30 day pilots license extension... Then you're on a second job that won't pay.

Of course, I'll still play EVE, it's fun - from time to time...

Enjoy!

 

[dududf]

I saw this review, and went into Eve expecting I'd hate it.

Sadly, I very much enjoy it, and I am able to fly around blowing shit up if I want just after a half week of lvling skills up. Me thinks Yahtzee didn't ask for help from anyone when he joined.

 

[Voodoomancer]

While I disagree with a lot of what he said...

...yes, we are all bizzaro people with shoes on our heads (in my corp anyway)

(also, yeah, I'd like to see some aliens)

 

[mattrules432]

Lets all bear in mind the purpose MMO's serve for different people.

For Kids: they use MMO's as "im bored and dont know what to do" activities, but also its the only way they can talk to their friends because their mom wont let them have a phone, or a facebook, or even an email adress.

For teens: basically out of boredom

For: everyone else: well it's either play an MMO and grind your way to insanity in the game or masturbate all day

 

[Drexlor]

Who squeezes toothpaste from the middle?

 

[BonsaiK]

8 months have elapsed since I last made a comment in this thread and CCP still haven't released walking in stations. Waiting until they do so I can say good things about this game. Until then, Yahtzee is right.

 

[Bruin]

I saw this review, and went into Eve expecting I'd hate it.

Sadly, I very much enjoy it, and I am able to fly around blowing shit up if I want just after a half week of lvling skills up. Me thinks Yahtzee didn't ask for help from anyone when he joined.

The thing with me about EVE is that I couldn't just get the hard grinding part over with; I had to wait weeks to do so. I thought the navigation, while not nearly as bad as Yahtzee was making it out to be, could be quite frustrating at times that you needed to go someplace quickly. Another part of it was that I couldn't pilot the ships I wanted to pilot. And no, I don't mean the Titans, I mean something worth a damn. I felt miniscule in comparison to other players who had mounds of ISK and flew around in the ships I only dreamed of piloting. Lo and behold I came to know they'd been playing for many more months than I had and were the people who called mining fun.

Other than that, I found the whole game -too- large for me. Too vast, as if everything I did made no difference to the world around me. Sure, I had some friends, got friendly with my corporation and whatnot, but in the end, I knew I would never join any corp that was actually competitive and that the big groups out there would inevitably crush my own. Perhaps it was just bad luck on my part, perhaps it's just not the game for me.

 

[Tibike77]

A few Hungarian EVE-Online gamers took it upon themselves to accomplish the gargantuan task of creating something that could be considered "EVE-Online's Game Manual".

The currently available version (2.01) has 416 full-color pages and is available as a 66+ MB PDF (or ZIP-packaged, but it's not much smaller that way, still over 55 MB).
The "production value" is pretty much on par with official game manuals (other than some sparsely encountered Hungarian language on the background art and the easy-to-forgive occasional spelling errors, but that's also on par with a lot of game manuals).
The sheer volume of information is staggering. Still, it BARELY COVERS THE BASICS of EVE-Online gameplay

It is available completely free of charge from their site:
http://www.isktheguide.com

They were also featured in an article on massively, which is an interview with one of the top people behind this monumental task.
http://www.massively.com/2010/08/29/eve-evolved-the-industrial-sized-knowledgebase


If you were ever turned off by the lack of documentation before you got a chance to try it, or if you tried it but hated it because of the learning curve, or even if you're just mildly interested but never bothered, it won't hurt to take a look at this completely volunteer work... if only for the pretty chapter heading graphics

 

[Dogstar060763]

...And last. CAREBEARS SUCK (people who do safe pve of mining). ...Death to peacefull miners and other carebears. Burn enemies poses. Build outpost. Thats the way.

As someone who is currently trying out a 14-day trial of EVE, congratulations to the above poster for convincing me never to take out a paid subscription and to uninstall this game ASAP. Frankly, if this is the mindset of the average EVE player - and the kind of thing that awaits me if I decide to commit to the game as a paying subscriber...No thanks. I'm finding the overwhelming learning curve difficult enough without the constant, nagging suspicion that all I am is newbie fodder waiting to be robbed, hijacked, attacked and humiliated by the kind of poster who makes comments like those above.

Another potential subscriber deterred by another of EVE's excellent ambassadors.

 

[uc.asc]

If that was the attitude of most players, they wouldn't have carebears to target would they?

On the other hand, the ability to find things out for yourself is sort of a prerequisite for playing eve, as is the ability to not give up the first time another player says something you don't like. I think you have made the right choice.

 

[aruvqan]

Ignore the jackass, there is room for carebears in the game, we are the ones who build the capital ships they have to buy to fly. If you have any questions in game, shoot me a convo - I play as Aruvqan, and I am a carebear in Mostly Harmless in the Northern Coalition

 

[DakRattler]

He is right in most aspect.
I Suppose the thing that I like most about EVE is the PvP actually means something. You have fleets that are tangible, meaning you can lose them, and in the world of EVE virtual money quite literally is real money.
Only game to give me an adrenaline rush while playing, but it does have its shortfalls.

 

[T0bias]

Watching this after having actually spent a fair bit of time playing eve, I'm pretty sure the problem here is EVE is a social game, and Ben is about as antisocial as it is possible to be. The thing that makes eve worthwhile is using that money you worked for and skills you spent all that time training to fight wars over control of profitable regions of space and having a laugh with your corp/alliance as you do so. The parts of the game he experienced in his 14 day trial are merely the means, and by refusing to join a corporation he completely disregarded the end, the fun part of eve, which consists of flying around and blowing other people's shit up.

 

[yaoinut]

I gave Eve a brief try, but I found the learning curve to be pretty unforgiving. I think this is a game that requires some real dedication to mastering. If your more casual, like me, it's probably never going to appeal to you.

 

[Strazdas]

Does this has to do with the fact that eve has a uncomparable learning curve and you couldnt beat it? well eve online is excel with graphics so what do you want. And it kept me intrested for a long time.

 

[Wookie 1]

I actually have no problem with a steep learning curve (3 years subbed), after all explain early games and how spectacularly hard they are. Or Supermeatboy

 

[drednoahl]

I like watching this review, it reminds me of how bad a reviewer Yahtzee really is. How able he is to so completely miss the bloody point.

EVE is one of my favourite games because it's exclusive. If you're too stupid to understand it, you'll hate it, call it shit and rage-quit so that us superior gamers don't have to associate with you. You sir, failed this test.

Ben "Yahtzee" Crowshaw, you're too stupid for EVE Online. Such a pity, I expected better from you.

My experience of EVE was frankly, shit. I must be stupid too to have missed the point of the game; but had I reviewed it I would have been far harsher than Yahtzee. As far as I'm concerned, the game is designed to have enough gamers waiting to level their skills up that they won't play that often, leaving server space for null sec wars and all the high-sec nonsense. It's a board game with pretty graphics with a dice roll for every skill 0-5 - the player with the most "skills" paid for by length of subscription wins, not the gamer with the ACTUAL skill.

Maybe the game opens up after you've paid your subscription long enough to have developed the "skills" for a decent experience... maybe. I'm not going to risk spending a considerable amount of money for a game that is in my opinion incredibly shallow; a game so simple it has to hide behind a maze of spreadsheets, a crappy UI and time dependent skill training (whether you actually log in or not) to give the illusion that it has depth. In my opinion, patience and money are the only requirements for EVE, not intelligence, skill or tactical nouce.

I thought playing EVE was like being forced to read the Daily Mail while waiting for a train that's at the platform but not due to leave for six weeks, while left clicking and pressing some number keys at the right time kinda like Dance Dance Revolution. Meanwhile a guy who's taken that train journey loads of time pisses on my head because that's the kind of thing "superior EVE" gamers do. EVE's devs, realised I wasn't to happy about sitting waiting for the train while the groves in the bench I'm sat on dig into my arse (but they weren't bothered about me being pissed on so much) so they built me a "captian's quarters" with a nicer chair in the hope I'd stick around. I caught a taxi elsewhere.

I remember thinking before I quit, (from sheer apathy and boredom) "I'd rather play Dead or Alive Beach Volleyball than this." I couldn't think of a shallower game, and conveniently it's also full of tits and arses, just like EVE.

-

Look, I'm a fan of space trading games and I'm glad that some people get off on EVE, however I think qualifying yourself as a superior gamer just because you play EVE is going way too far, and calling those of us who can see through the "mask" of EVE's complexity "stupid" is probably the same and pretty damn offensive; the gamers who are truly superior to me do not act in such a manor.