Zombie Informed Survival Test (Z.I.S.T.)

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Andrew_Waltfeld

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nuba km said:
Andrew_Waltfeld said:
nuba km said:
lordlillen said:
you get C+, needs to be more realistic with plans and think more long term.
EMFCRACKSHOT said:
A, thorough knowledge of zombies can help a lot knowing your weapons is also a good thing to do if I meet you on my journey thorough the zombie wasteland you can join the zombie survival team we are the best of the best at zombie survival.
rofl I would not say that until it actually happens and you survive. Don't proclaim things you have yet to earn. Smarts and know how doesn't mean you'll survive everything.
OK I'll be more accurate we are the best of the best at zombie survival plans.
sounds good. Just saying, being over confident can kill a team just quick as being stupid.
 

Dead_Man

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Nov 18, 2009
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1. barricade the door to the best of my ability. I would arrange the things on the store(shelves, desks, what have you) to funnel the zombies into a tight corridor. I would then arange as many chainsaws and other cutting power tools at approximate head and foot level so the dumb zombies would just decapitate themselves or would crawl around. I would stay at the end with a crowbar and wait if any get through. wait until it's over.

2. run like hell, and chuck the grenade at the crowd to thin their numbers. Have the cop bash any that are left over that get too close. If it comes to it, trip the cop over. i dont know if the kid is infected so no need to have her dead.

3. give him cover fire as he's getting up. If he gets caught and bite, be merciful and shoot him in the head. then keep running.
 

WanderingFool

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Well,

#1, try and construct a trap or several to use, then lure the zombies inside.

#2, If the girl is slowing us down, screw the rest, I have a fucking frying pan, the only hero im gonna be is the sandwich.

#3, cover him until he is up, if he cant get up in a few seconds, im not going back for him, because we would both be done for.

I may be a possible hero in TRUE zombie scenarios, when you leave true zombies behind (L4D and 28 days are not real zombies, they are infected, most likely rabid), than fuck it, im not going to try and be hero.
 

Muphin_Mann

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1.you have ran into a small hard ware store that has: gardening equipment, tools and cash register. you have locked the front door and there is no back door. their are around 200-300 zombies out side what to you do? (in this situation it's slow hard to kill zombies)

My Response: Well if their is gasoline then using one of those mowers that moves foreward as long as the handle is down...camp fuel and gasoline duct taped onto one of those bad boys with the handle likewise duct taped down. Soak it in gas, light it, and let it go. Whenever the heat pops the fist little pressureized camp stove tank or spray-form lighter refueling bottle then the whole thing will bust and throw gasoline all over the area. The noise of the mowers should draw the zombies to that side. While they burn and chase the mower i grab a lightweight bladed gardening implement (like a squared off shovel) and beat feet out of their. If need be use a power tool to make a new hole in the wall on the other side, but ditch it since chainsaws are effing heavy and i used the gasoline for the bomb.

2. you have teamed up with a police man and injured 5 year old girl, the police officer is out of ammo and only has a baton left you are carrying a frying pan/combat knife/grenade/pointed metal pole (pick one) zombies are hot on your tail you are about 500m away from a save house what to you do? (these zombies are left 4 dead zombies)

Response: I have a grenade. And the zombies run faster but are very frail then if i remember correctly. If we got this close to the saferoom the girl is either immune or an asymptomatic carrier (and so are we) since the disease acts quickly and is airborn rather than bite-based. If its a left 4 dead grenade im going with pipe bomb and we can just toss it and waltz to the safe room. If not im throwing it behind the zombies to distract some and to lessen the odds shrapnel kills us since IRL frag grenades are defensive and have a greater kill radius than they can normaly be thrown. Luckily i have a few dozen meatshields. I carry the girl and the cop follows us in a fighting retreat. When i reach the saferoom i use the weapons stashed their to cover the rest of his retreat since he will have to be walking bakcwards to fight off the zombies. The saferooms always have guns and these zombies are pushovers so no one has to die. And without another adult i will die in the next area if i hunter or smoker or whathaveyou jumps me.

3. you and the person closest to you are 100m away from a helicopter that will rescue you when the other person falls over with the zombies 50m behind you have a pistol with 20 shots left what do you do? (these are 28 days later zombies)

Response: Pull them up and keep running. Or just let them stand on their own if they are fast. Fire back as we go, aiming low. Hit the frontrunners legs to trip the ones behind. With such a barebones scenario their isnt much to do. If it looks like we are going to be overrun then i stop running to let my loved one escape while i go down fighting. I would rather be the badass with his own personal 1 vs an army death scene than the guy who dies a karmic death later because he was a dick to his mum or wife or son or something.
 

Bravo 21

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1. Use ladder to get through the roof of the store (it could take a while, but hey, ill find a way, maybe a skylight), and then throw improvised explosives into the crowd of zombies, while trying to attract a helicopter, or other people.
2. grab the five year old, run like hell, have cop through the grenade at the zombies, andrenaline and fear will drive me forward.
3. Any friend that I am travelling with in the Zombie apocalypse will be able to get up very quickly, on the grounds that the ones who cant have long since been left behind. I intend to save that ammunition.
 

Daveman

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Jan 8, 2009
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1) Barricade and try to take out zombies one by one from the roof with a nail gun. Or wait lure them to the ladder where you take them out with an axe/blunt object one by one. After a couple of days I imagine you'll be clear to go. At this point take what you need then burn the building. This is all assuming there is no ability for me to run away, the place is surrounded by zombies and chances of getting past without getting caught is unlikely. When in doubt, run.

2) Grab the girl, drop the grenade and leg it. I'm already immune by the laws of the L4D universe so if I'm bit or whatever I'll just be injured, not infected, and there'll be med kits in the safe house so I'd be able to treat myself. Police guy can run behind me to keep them away initially, swinging his baton, and then run ahead to get ready to slam the door. People with me are useful for many reasons but the main one is having a guard for when you sleep. Even a five year old can do that. Worst comes to the worst, I drop the five year old and leg it, the zombies are distracted by the five year old and no longer follow me and I'm free to make my escape.

3) Just keep running, too high a chance of getting infected in the 28 days universe. I'd be useless with a pistol anyway so me turning to cover them would be useless and buy little time as the zombies will be on us in about 10 seconds. Unfortunately that's the situation where you leave them, similar to the start of 28 weeks. If he's very close to the chopper I'd turn and reassess the situation before deciding whether to just ditch them or not. If we did leave I'd ask the sniper to kill him mercifully.
 

RabbidKuriboh

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1-use a series of chainsaws and car batteries to create an ultimate defense and wait while the 300 walk into it

2-the girl was bitten, slit her throat and throw the body to the horde while we run away(harsh i know but she was infected)

3-order the chopper to mow down the zombies to help my buddy
 

chif-ii

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Aug 31, 2010
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Someone's probably going to blam me for not reading carefully, but I really don't care.

Situation 1: Drag a ladder up to the rooftop, and use it to travel around the canopy of the city, scrounging for goods or a car that works.

Sit 2: using High School of the Dead logic, throw the grenade as far away from the zombies as possible. The sound will draw the undead away, allowing the three of us to sneak around them, taking off our shoes and breathing lightly so as to escape detection.

Sit 3: If the person is a lover, then help them up and keep running. If they're just the person who I happen to be standing right next to, then ditch them.
 

WolfThomas

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Dec 21, 2007
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Scenario 1: Gather diesels if possible along with manure, ropes and bottles. Place on roof. Gather protective gear in the form of waders, aprons, welding gloves, gardening helwmet/visors, etc. Gather machetes, crowbars, whole bunch of blunt weapons. Gather most importantly bush hooks and straps. Also gather any unlikely food (seeds are better than nothing) or water (if possible fill containers from taps). Gather rope. Place everything on roof.

Think about making crude bombs, rule it out as a last resort due to noise and danger to self. Open door while running back, this allows bottle neck, climb ladder. Wait. If zombies climb ladder, kill one by one with hammer to head. If they don't strap self to ladder and swing bush hook at their heads, while remaining out of reach. Have spare bush hooks for inevitable breakage or loss.

Kill all until no more come, then exit via rope to outside from roof. Live.

Scenario 2:
Pick up child in firemans carry, place head away from body so she can't bite if turning suddenly. Rely on genre saviness that children often surive. The cop should be better trained in using his baton and fighting people than I am, I'm pretty well built so carrying the girl shouldn't be too hard. Choose combat knife because I don't want to get into a prolonged melee and it is light enough to carry. I also know how to use a knife if a zombie gets close enough. Hope but don't assume that Cop will perform heroic sacrifice in dire enough scenario. All else fails run with girl as fast as possible dropping her if she starts to turn. Live.

Scenario 3:
Keep running, only once at chopper turn around. If fellow survivor is up and running cover him by shooting at zombies with pistol. Tell pilot to start to hover let survivor grab rail then take off immediately. Once safely away help survivor into chopper. If survivor is down, put him out of misery with rifle after safely hovering to a good height. Live.
 

nuba km

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Dead_Man said:
B,while creative your plans need to more realistic.
WanderingFool said:
B, need more long term thinking and understanding of how many zombies you can handle at a time (also I go with the spirit of what a zombie i.e. a person who has no mind and is trying to kill you. originally zombies weren't corpses brought back to live but rather dead bodies possessed by evil spirits and had no turning someone into zombie abilities and the head was not a weak spot but rather holy objects. If you want a 'true' zombie.)
Muphin_Mann said:
B+, while you think you plans through and know your zombies you need better weapon choices.
Bravo 21 said:
B, you need to work on your plans and weapon choices.
Daveman said:
B, some of your plans could really use some improving but you have good knowledge of zombies
RabbidKuriboh said:
C, over confident and needs to know his weapons better.
chif-ii said:
B+, you think a bit more out of the box but realistically but knowledge of zombies could be improved.
WolfThomas said:
A, you think your plans through and take multi-pal possibilities into consideration though a very good survivor (in theory) you are just short of the team but to be fair when the ZA actually hits I don't think I will be that picky of who joins my team.
 

KefkaCultist

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Jun 8, 2010
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1. Many would say chainsaw in this situation but I personally would not for a few reasons. 1) it runs on gas. 2) the display models are not filled with gas. 3) the display models don't always have the chains on the saw.
My weapon of choice for this would be a shovel. They're durable, have decent reach, can be used as a blunt or sharp object, and best of all shovels don't run on any form of energy other than your own.
Obviously, 300 zombies is a lot and I'll have to think of an escape because I'm not He-man. First, I would move everything I can physically move to blockade the windows. Block the door somewhat, but have main focus on the windows. Then create a bottle neck from the door so that preferably only 1-3 zombies can fit through at a time and put a large but somewhat easily movable / tip-able object at the end of the bottleneck and then find a ladder and position it next to the back door. Once I have all this set up I check the back door to see how it's locked. If it is a padlock I will look to see if this store has any compressed air cans and if so turn it upside down and spray the lock (it freezes the lock and makes the metal brittle) and simply break it with a hammer. After the lock is off, I will wait until the zombies break in, and fight them for a while so that some commotion gets drawn to the front of the building. Once I feel that its enough I will tip over / move the large object I put at the end of the bottle neck blocking the zombies off and run out the back door with the ladder to get to the roof. Now, if it's an inside lock like I kind of assume it would be then simply find a crowbar and put it next to the door and once again wait for zombies to come in, fight some, block zombies, then I would break the door open with the crowbar, grab ladder, and head to roof.

2. First off, I'd take the pointed metal pole because, a) a frying pan just sounds useless. b) knives are really close combat and CQC + zombies = not good idea. c) a grenade, while sounding extremely useful in either killing a massive amount of zombies or as a noise distraction, it is a one time use and offers me little in protection. d) the pointed metal pole, if it's how I imagine it, is an object with good reach (I'm thinking like the size of a spear) and offers the abilities of a blunt and sharp object. Secondly, it's every man / woman / little girl for themselves in the zombie apocalypse so I'd save my own hide. If the cop wants to come with me then thats great. If he wants to be an idiot and save the weak girl then he will die and I will live. Besides, depending on the girl's injury she could turn into a zombie at any time.
As soon as I get to the safe house I will check to see if the cop is coming and the zombies are still a good distance behind him. If not then I block the entrance with everything big and heavy that I can find. If he is right behind me with a good distance ahead of the zombies then I will wait for him to get in then block the entrance with everything big and heavy that I can find.

3. Fuck him, I'm hauling ass. As stated in #2, everyman for himself and it's his fault that he fell. Maybe he should tie his shoes in the next life, I'll be having a mojito with other people that know not to fail at critical moments.

EDIT: fixed #1 and #2. I'm happy with my #3. This was typed at 3:30 - 4:00 in the morning so maybe I'm not thinking straight but they look like good plans to me
 

MrJKapowey

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nuba km said:
1.you have ran into a small hard ware store that has: gardening equipment, tools and cash register. you have locked the front door and there is no back door. their are around 200-300 zombies out side what to you do? (in this situation it's slow hard to kill zombies)
2. you have teamed up with a police man and injured 5 year old girl, the police officer is out of ammo and only has a baton left you are carrying a frying pan/combat knife/grenade/pointed metal pole (pick one) zombies are hot on your tail you are about 500m away from a save house what to you do? (these zombies are left 4 dead zombies)
3. you and the person closest to you are 100m away from a helicopter that will rescue you when the other person falls over with the zombies 50m behind you have a pistol with 20 shots left what do you do? (these are 28 days later zombies)

Hmm...

1. Pile the shelves up to block the front and windows. Use others to build a step from which I can haul myself up to the roof cavity (I'm presuming there is one).

Or (BEST PLAN)_ climb out of reach of the zombies. Best would be to wait till another survivor distracted them (sorry Griff). Get a large box, flare or blow torch and any other main weapon that has a range; then climb up onto the roof via the ladder. If the ladder is inside then it is even better. Use the ear protectors to block out the sound of the moaning and lock the trap door. Wait till either the zombies move away, the zombies turn to mush as they decompose too much. IF this DOESN'T happen then I will use a weapon that I got from the store (eg nail gun) to kill myself with speed via my eye socket.

2. Pointed metal pole: I can be pretty effective with it (can use Longsword and Quarter staff effectively) Get Mac Taylor (Yes the officer is him. No I don't care what you say) to give me his baton, fend off the zombies whilst backing off towards the safe house. When the girl and Mac reach 50 meters away from the house then I run, first using the stick to push the first line back away from me. When we reach the house (I presume I survived, if not then I gave my life to save a larger number of people and I can't ask for a better death in a zombie apocalypse than that) Me and Mac secure the doors and windows. We leave food and water in a secure room with the girl for a day or so. Calling her the first half of a word in Phonetic to her every three hours. She has to reply the second half (Sierra, Echo. Alpha, Lima). Me and Mac hoarde the food and stuff onto the (presumed) first floor and prepare to destroy the stairs so the zombies cannae get us.

3.Exhort him to F*cking move whilst I back slowly away. If he can't get up and I try to save him then we will both die. Get the pilot to fly along at chest height towards us. I climb on and hopefully pull the guy up onto the skid if he lives. If not then I tried, but I'm not gonna die so both of us can go out together.

(NOTE: I would not use the pistol as my accuracy at this level would be terrible. Give me an L98 and he would be fine, but a pistol?)
 
Jan 11, 2009
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1. Find gasoline somewhere in the store and go onto the roof to pour it across the zombies before throwing down rags that are on fire. Use the cash register to reinforce the door among other items in the store. Spend my time thinning out the zombies with whatever I can throw from the roof. If it looks like ill be there a while I'll start a patch on the roof to sustain myself.

2. I'll take the pointy pole. If these were slow zombies I would risk covering the policeman while he took the girl (depending on how long the pole is) but in this situation I'd feel like a monster but I'd leave her.

3. 28 Days Later zombies are too vicious to take chances with. I would run to the chopper and wait a tiny amount of time to see if he could get up quickly enough, if so I would cover him, if not he's on his own.
 

Knusper

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Sep 10, 2010
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1) This really is a hopeless situation, but I think I would just get the killiest object I could find and go out onto the roof and (assuming they can actually climb a ladder but not very quickly) and kill them one by one as they climb up.

2) If you mean 'hot on your heels' as in 5 - 10 metres behind then just carry on sprinting. If they are more than 30 metres, then I would throw the grenade (after taking the pin out, of course) into the mass of zombies whilst instructing the policeman to pick up the girl and run

3) Most 30 - 50 year olds can pick themselves up quite quickly, so I think that I would cover him with my pistol whilst taking a few cowardly steps back towards the helicopter.
 

trollnystan

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Dec 27, 2010
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1. I will either stay huddled in a corner slowly starving to death OR go out in a blaze - a horrifyingly gruesome blaze - of panicked terror as I attack the zombies with a pair of pruning shears in each hand when trying to escape after succumbing to cabin fever. Or if the zombies manage to break in, well, I'm ewed-scray anyway, pruning shears or nay.

2. I scream higher than the 5 year old girl whom I'm foolishly trying to run with in my arms. I'm soon overcome by the horde, as I've forgotten the first rule of survival - cardio. As I'm fruitlessly swatting at them with my frying pan - child having already dragged out of my arms - I watch as the policeman hightails it to the safe house, my only hope the guilt will finally kill him off too.

3. I turn back, firing frantically into the horde as he gets up and runs ahead of me. I sprint after him but then I trip and fall and that darn melon farmer of a "friend" doesn't return the favour but keeps running for the chopper. The sniper tries to keep them off me but ultimately I am overcome and turned into the zombies' meal du jour.

Seriously, I will not survive long when the zombies finally attack. I suck.
 

Daveman

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Jan 8, 2009
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nuba km said:
Daveman said:
B, some of your plans could really use some improving but you have good knowledge of zombies
Yeah, the first step in the zombie apocalypse (apart from running away) is determining to learn about them as their behaviour will really have to influence your rules. In the second example I couldn't leave the girl because once we start abondoning one another in the L4D universe we're doomed, I mean you if you've tried soloing on any difficulty above normal you'll understand (I mean bots help too but even they are much less helpful than an actual person). If I leave the girl I'm guessing the policeman is less likely to trust me to watch his back which is bad when I need to trust him watching mine.
 

nuba km

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KefkaCultist said:
first plan is good exept if you open the back door (an exit) why don't just run away they are slow zombies. other plans are perfectly fine and you have a good knowledge of your weapons you get an A.
MrJKapowey said:
you get c, need to plan ahead and don't put yourself in a situation were you might have to kill yourself unless absolutely necessary.
ICantBelieveItGoesBoom said:
B, need to have plan for escape over killing the zombies
Knusper said:
B-, your plans need to be more thought out.
trollnystan said:
F, even though I don't doubt that would be your reaction not exactly what you look for in a zombie SURVIVAL team.
 

MrJKapowey

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nuba km said:
MrJKapowey said:
you get c, need to plan ahead and don't put yourself in a situation were you might have to kill yourself unless absolutely necessary.
Well you did sya that I was in a hardware store with a flat roof and a ladder. I can get up and zombies can't but there would be no way out as your description claims that there are 200-300 zombies outside and I wouldn't be able to fight through that. If there was a buggy in the shop then I would drive that, but get up a ladder is the best defense: 'real' zombies can't climb ladders but the crush of hundreds or thousands can knock down any quik-fix barricade.

Sorry, but just thought I would get a better garde and you didn't grade situation 2 or 3.