A question for our non-smoking, non-drinking, non-recreational-drugs-using, romance seeking Escapees

[Biosophilogical]

I have a moral opposition to mind-altering drugs in the quantities necesary to achieve such an effect. I also hate the idea of chemical addictions. I also believe that at 16 I am not mature enough to be having sex (which is, ironically(?), what makes me more mature than most of the people actually having sex). But while I do not partake in drinking, drug-taking, smoking or sex I am happy, very happy infact. I instead take joy from non-questionable things such as intellectual development, jokes, friendly interactions, gaming, philosophical discussion and immaturity (but in a mature way).

So yeah, I reckon if I did partake in drugs and the like my life, while filled with 'instant' pleasures would not have the depth that brings me a deep and satisfactory happiness. So in truth, while you find it hard to empathise with my position, I find it hard to empathise with yours beyond "Your life is a shallow and empty husk and you use such things as smoking, drinking, sex and drugs as a way of filling the void that you are in denial about possessing". Now that may be horrendously wrong, but that is the only way in which I can understand your situation in much the same way that you find it hard to understand mine.

 

[Nihilism_Is_Bliss]

i exist in an eternal state of utterly melancholic, nihilistic apathy.

But seriously, meh.
meh is all i can say.
for the last few months the opening sentence kinda actually applies to me. Just sorta existing. not really happy, not really unhappy.

 

[wordsmith]

Killing yourself slowly makes you happy? Umm every time you drink alcohol in an excessive (read:get drunk even in the slightest) your brain permanently becomes dumber.

And yet the brain of a regular "excessive drinker" can figure out that "dumber" isn't a word?

OT: I drink, I don't smoke or do drugs, and if she's offering then it's fairly rare for me to refuse. The reason I don't smoke or do drugs is because I'm laid back enough to not need to smoke. Likewise, if I want to get out of my head, alcohol does that nicely, so I don't need to buy anything that I don't know the contents of. If other people want to do it, great stuff, just don't keep offering me it after I turn it down.

All of that said, I know a guy who died because his liver failed and he didn't make the transplant list. He had a stressful job, so he'd go home and have a couple of shots of Rum to relax, then get on with his evening. Even when he knew his liver was on the way out, he still did it. Why? Because he "needed it". He said that to me 3 nights before he died, ever since then if I catch myself thinking "I need a drink", I don't have one. Wanting a drink is fine, it's fun so why not? Needing a drink is dependancy.

 

[Doug]

I don't drink, because I don't like it.
I don't smoke, because I don't feel a need to.
I don't take drugs, because I don't want to, and especially don't want to get addicted.

Am I happy with life? Not so much - I feel abit isolated from the 'no drinking' thing, cus our whole culture over here in the UK seems purely geared towards drinking. Also, I'm still looking for a gf, which seems a hopeless cause these days.

 

[FairlyFrightenedFeline]

You know what? Jesus is the best high I've ever had.

 

[Dexiro]

I've got to admit you attached a significant amount of glamour to smoking and drinking there. Those 2 certainly would liven up my game playing a bit but they're just habits i'd rather not take up.

 

[NoNameMcgee]

I can totally understand people not wanting to drink, do drugs or smoke and being perfectly happy. Personally I drink but don't really like getting further than 'tipsy' (seriously, puking all over the place, doing things you regret, and waking up in the morning with a splitting headache is not my idea of a good time) though I do go clubbing and love to dance and party... and have just as much fun as anyone else there. As for drugs and smoking, I don't do drugs though I'll probably try someday. And I tried smoking once and thought it was discusting, so haven't again. Plus I don't want to develop a habit.

As for the sex thing though: refusing sex just because its casual, and not meaningful even if they're attracted to the person and would enjoy having sex with them, is just being stupid and old fashioned. These people are really missing out on a lot of fun, but hey its their loss and their choice. Even if it makes little to no sense.

At the end of the day people should enjoy life, but everyone has different ways of enjoying it. That's what makes us unique. On the other hand, judging by what a depressing place the Escapist can be sometimes, and from what I have seen of how lonely/miserable/angry/angsty a lot of the members here are, I think a lot of people here do need to reevaluate their life and how they can improve it.

 

[ReckzB]

We can. We're just on opposite sides of the argument. I'm Pierce Brosnan to your Sean Bean in GoldenEye and vice versa.

Well it's nice to know a Bond reference can be made of this. Though I probably don't really get it; never been a fan of the franchise myself, lol.

To provide an actual response to your initial question; I've been gaming for a sizeable portion of my life, and will continue to do so as long as it provides a solid base of entertainment for me. So, am I happy? Sure, why not?

 

[Spinozaad]

I have a moral opposition to mind-altering drugs in the quantities necesary to achieve such an effect. I also hate the idea of chemical addictions. I also believe that at 16 I am not mature enough to be having sex (which is, ironically(?), what makes me more mature than most of the people actually having sex). But while I do not partake in drinking, drug-taking, smoking or sex I am happy, very happy infact. I instead take joy from non-questionable things such as intellectual development, jokes, friendly interactions, gaming, philosophical discussion and immaturity (but in a mature way).

So yeah, I reckon if I did partake in drugs and the like my life, while filled with 'instant' pleasures would not have the depth that brings me a deep and satisfactory happiness. So in truth, while you find it hard to empathise with my position, I find it hard to empathise with yours beyond "Your life is a shallow and empty husk and you use such things as smoking, drinking, sex and drugs as a way of filling the void that you are in denial about possessing". Now that may be horrendously wrong, but that is the only way in which I can understand your situation in much the same way that you find it hard to understand mine.

An interesting post.

Although I'd say that while you might my life as a 'shallow and empty husk', as a 'void that I deny' and which is being filled by mind-altering substances, I see the occasional use as an added excitement to life, a more intense area to discover and a way to heighten the mountain of life, which I'm gladly climbing.

And alas, I would not say you're more mature than the sixteen year-olds that do have sex.

Then again, like my somewhat offensively worded original OP, it's simply a matter of perspective, no?

 

[MelasZepheos_v1legacy]

I don't smoke, partly because I didn't really like the taste and partly because I do a lot of singing and I noticed that for the one week I did try smoking my voice started to go after only six days. I don't drink because I used to drink in my younger days and I drank far too much and too often (I eventually got bottled off stage, which stopped that) and I used to recreationally use amphetamines (which stopped when I got diagnosed with bipolar disorder and made me realise how much I had messed up my own brain chemistry by accident) and I don't engage in casual sex.

But I am for all intents and purposes very happy. I perform often, I have a group of friends I am very close with, I write and draw daily, and I watch movies, videogame, and do lots of entertaining things.

I decided four/five years ago that I actually wanted to enjoy my life, but also to remember that I had enjoyed my life. Drinking and drug use would wipe my memory, so I would never know if I had enjoyed myself or not. Evidence might have suggested that I did, but I compare a gig that I can only remember from the photos I was shown and a gig where I can really picture the audience up at the front of the stage cheering for me and there's no comparison.

Really, performing is my biggest outlet right now. There is nothing else like it that I've found. It's a better high by far than any of the other vices you mentioned (apart from very close and personal sex with someone that I was in love with), so I'm sticking with it. Also, vis a vis the aforementioned bipolarity, if I were to indulge in a lot of the things that you mentioned then it would (and has in the past) seriously screw me up, so I've kind of had to learn how to have fun without all that stuff, and I honestly think I have more fun sober than I ever did under any other influences. I still get the massive highs of a manic period and the suicidal lows of a depressive state, and I don't want to bring them on myself very much.

 

[DanDeFool]

Of course you can't imagine being happy without drugs/sex/rock 'n roll. I can't imagine being happy WITH those things. Being happy isn't so much about doing or not doing specific activities, but in doing those activities that you enjoy and/or find rewarding.

Personally, I have to admit that I'm kind of a chickenshit when it comes to hanging out with people who like to get drunk, use hard drugs, and sleep around. Where you might see opportunities for fun, I see serious threats to my health, finances, and overall well-being. Neither of us is wrong; we just have a different perspective and a different set of priorities.

Some people will talk shit about what other people do, naturally, and the reason those people are so infuriating is because they're being extremely self-centered. They think everyone should do what THEY believe is right, not realizing that their perspective is unique to them.

 

[Cheesus333]

You know what? Jesus is the best high I've ever had.

Single best thing I've heard all week - and I'm not even a Christian.

 

[Sarkule]

I do none of those things, and am incredibly happy, and satisfied with my life

 

[UberNoodle]

No smoking, no drugs, no 'casual sex' and perfectly fine. I don't have the health issues that go along with the first two, and I don't have the stress that can follow the second. I do other things that enrich my life. I think that OP has a narrow sense of what is fulfilling in life.

 

[FairlyFrightenedFeline]

You know what? Jesus is the best high I've ever had.

Single best thing I've heard all week - and I'm not even a Christian.

Yaay i made someone happpy!

 

[Biosophilogical]

I have a moral opposition to mind-altering drugs in the quantities necesary to achieve such an effect. I also hate the idea of chemical addictions. I also believe that at 16 I am not mature enough to be having sex (which is, ironically(?), what makes me more mature than most of the people actually having sex). But while I do not partake in drinking, drug-taking, smoking or sex I am happy, very happy infact. I instead take joy from non-questionable things such as intellectual development, jokes, friendly interactions, gaming, philosophical discussion and immaturity (but in a mature way).

So yeah, I reckon if I did partake in drugs and the like my life, while filled with 'instant' pleasures would not have the depth that brings me a deep and satisfactory happiness. So in truth, while you find it hard to empathise with my position, I find it hard to empathise with yours beyond "Your life is a shallow and empty husk and you use such things as smoking, drinking, sex and drugs as a way of filling the void that you are in denial about possessing". Now that may be horrendously wrong, but that is the only way in which I can understand your situation in much the same way that you find it hard to understand mine.

An interesting post.

Although I'd say that while you might my life as a 'shallow and empty husk', as a 'void that I deny' and which is being filled by mind-altering substances, I see the occasional use as an added excitement to life, a more intense area to discover and a way to heighten the mountain of life, which I'm gladly climbing.

And alas, I would not say you're more mature than the sixteen year-olds that do have sex.

Then again, like my somewhat offensively worded original OP, it's simply a matter of perspective, no?

It would appear so. Though I do believe that in regards to sex I am more mature than my peers, as, unlike them, I have the, how shall I put it ... perspective, to realise that having sex, protected or not, when you are not in the position to financially support children is irresponsible on a collossal level (of course if the woman would get an abortion and not get all maternal, or if there was a 100% effective contraception method then I'd have no issue with it, and for this reason I have no issue with people having sex with either a same-sex partner or an infertile partner). So yes, you are entirely correct that it is a matter of perspective, but I feel that those of my peers whom are having sex have lost their own perspective to the rush of hormones commanding them to procreate with anything in a skirt.

But yes, just like morals all of this is relative to the observer, though I woulod like to point out that I did not say that your life was an empty and shallow husk, but rather that that was my only way of empathising with your chosen lifestyle. I am, of course, open to the idea of other reasons I was merely stating that I was unable to understand them on any real level.

 

[Pegghead]

Well I don't drink, smoke or do drugs and considering the state of the world that's probably not even due to age anymore and I'm a hopeless romantic. And you know what, I'm happy. For instance, being Catholic I use to wonder why I wasn't really allowed to have sex before marriage, mainly why I had to wait that long until I could. Then I realized that sex is just not that important and that there's more to relationships than it (but maybe that's just because I'm one of these old school romantics).

People get enjoyment from different things, some people live fulfilled lives up in mountain caves with no electricity. You feel that smoking, drinking, drugs and shagging are what will make you happy in life then that's fine by me. Just don't go making threads about it that are basically assuming that people like me are either joyless or bigots.

 

[Cheesus333]

You know what? Jesus is the best high I've ever had.

Single best thing I've heard all week - and I'm not even a Christian.

Yaay i made someone happpy!

I kinda hope someone looks at this and learns the importance of simple pleasures

 

[imgunagitusucka]

I used to to all of your favorite things, but gave it all up about four years ago. No I didn't find Jesus, or Allah, I just became bored with it. Actually by 16 I was bored with alcohol and spent the next 13 years of my life ingesting recreational drugs, partying, and generally having a 'good' time. Luckily I was still able to hold down full time employment and the drugs did no major physical of psycological damage to me. Despite my older brother suffering a drug induced psycosis and dying by the age of 24 due to the lifestyle, it barely slowed me down. Eventually it just didn't seem worth it anymore, and now I'm content having 3-4 drinks after work on a friday afternoon. With all the money I've saved after quitting it all, I've managed to accumulate everything I could ever want in just a few short years. It's quite a buzz knowing that I'm free from financial strain and have a decent future ahead of me. That's something I wouldn't have otherwise.