A Real Animal You Never Want to Meet

[Vilcus]

The fact that I am terrified by insects is enough to make me fear these things. But since they're also venomous, and can jump... I don't think I'm ever going to Australia (I know they're only really founds in the forests and stuff, but they still scare the crap out of me, along with all the other deadly insects over there).

'forests and stuff'?

You realise that 'stuff' includes most suburbs, right?

We used to torment the wee bastards when we were kids... then we'd get bored, pour some kerosene down their hole and brew em up.

Different sub-species present different threats. The ones that live in the forests are more dangerous. Not because they're more venomous or anything, but because you're in their natural habitat. Trying to burn one of their nests in the forest would get you killed. That is unless you have a flame thrower, in which case I pose the question, why are you wasting you time burning ants when you could be engulfing random objects in flames?

Also if the ones you encoutnered could jump I doubt you'd be able to actaully torment them if their numbers were great enough. Keep in mind humans find it difficult to deal with scorpions, and they aren't that big. Just imagine if all scorpions could jump.

 

[Dango]

I never want to meet a group of angry Archer Fish.

They will spit you to death.

 

[Canid117]

For all those not aware these things are secretly evil.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/earthnews/3323070/Killer-dolphins-baffle-marine-experts.html

Wow, they're quite the vicouis little bastards aren't they.

They murder babies for shits and giggles. So yes they are quite vicious little bastards.

Anything from Australia is pretty bad too.

For me, it would have to be giant-ass spiders. I don't even want to go searching for an image I hate them so bad.

You mean the Goliath Birdeater spider?


This wee fella here?

Soooo fuzzilly kyoooot

Jesus, I actually shook when I saw that thing. I can't imagine holding it.

I have absolutely no problem with bugs or spiders, but holding a giant fuzzy one like that? I'd be traumatized.

And when I first entered this thread first thing that came to mind was a Giant Squid.

What about the Golden Orb Weaver. Their Wikipedia page seems innocent enough for an arachnid until you see these pictures.

and

 

[TraumaHound]

The Amazionian Candiru fish....deadly deadly little critters

Oh shit, I heard The Monarch talk about that, no fucking thank you!

Spoiler: The Monarch Describes the Terror that is the Candiru

 

[Blatherscythe]

salt water crocs,

Do you think he realizes that the croc could just crawl in and commence with the deathroll?

 

[SuperCombustion]

Does a T-Rex count?

 

[Griphphin]

I'd have to go with a zebra. I mean, with a giraffe or a platypus, you could brag to your friends like, "Hey, I just saw a giraffe and/or platypus!" With a zebra, it's too normal to be really exotic (horse with stripes), but too out of the blue not to point out.
Meaning a zebra is a walking awkward moment generator for you and your friends, something I thought the platypus would do tbh

 

[Chessrk]

Anything poisonous would freak me the hell out. At least with a shark it'll be quick, but some poisons will take you out long n' painful without treatment.

 

[Taddy]

For me, it would have to be giant-ass spiders. I don't even want to go searching for an image I hate them so bad.

You mean the Goliath Birdeater spider?


This wee fella here?

Soooo fuzzilly kyoooot

Jesus, I actually shook when I saw that thing. I can't imagine holding it.

I have absolutely no problem with bugs or spiders, but holding a giant fuzzy one like that? I'd be traumatized.

And when I first entered this thread first thing that came to mind was a Giant Squid.

I had a bad encounter with a squid on a fishing trip about 7 years ago, prick of a thing got me with it's ink or water or whatever the hell it spat at me. But still, spiders, spiders take the cake for being the most scariest bastards alive on my list. One that size would've made me shit my collective pants.

 

[Denamic]

Snakehead fish.

These things are motherfucking crazy.

I don't get it.
It's just a fish.
These are bigger.
Skip to 2:30

 

[Emilin_Rose]

6 words: South American Goliath Bird Eating Tarantula [http://animal-world.com/encyclo/reptiles/spiders/GoliathBirdEatingSpider.php].

 

[Zyxx]

Candiru gets my vote.
I'm fond of most animals, even big hairy spiders and venomous snakes (not that I'm stupid enough to handle the latter; I've no training in it, after all.) However, parasitic critters (ticks, tapeworms, leeches bot flies, those little water amoebas that crawl in your eye) creep me right the hell out.

 

[zyfyn]

i think the guy in the back does, looks like he's trying to climb the guy in front to get out lol

 

[Canid117]

Snakehead fish.

These things are motherfucking crazy.

I don't get it.
It's just a fish.
These are bigger.
Skip to 2:30

Alligator Gar are of a pretty decent size for a fish. They also have some fairly sharp teeth.

 

[Aenir]

For me, it would have to be giant-ass spiders. I don't even want to go searching for an image I hate them so bad.

You mean the Goliath Birdeater spider?


This wee fella here?

Soooo fuzzilly kyoooot

Jesus, I actually shook when I saw that thing. I can't imagine holding it.

I have absolutely no problem with bugs or spiders, but holding a giant fuzzy one like that? I'd be traumatized.

And when I first entered this thread first thing that came to mind was a Giant Squid.

I had a bad encounter with a squid on a fishing trip about 7 years ago, prick of a thing got me with it's ink or water or whatever the hell it spat at me. But still, spiders, spiders take the cake for being the most scariest bastards alive on my list. One that size would've made me shit my collective pants.

Are you perhaps thinking of an octopus? They're sometimes confused and octopi are well-known for using ink jets to escape predators.

 

[HellbirdIV]

Black mambas. Not only do I have a horrible phobia of snakes, but those motherfuckers are the worst. They want you dead and won't stop coming at you until you kill them back, and of course apart from just being very venomous (Among the top 10 in the world or something) they also bite several times just to be sure/dicks.

I mean seriously, what other animal is so intentionally cruel and dickish about killing people, aside from, y'know, humans?

 

[InnerRebellion]

A fuckin' polar bear. Those things don't screw around.

 

[Blatherscythe]

Does a T-Rex count?

Has to be living in today's era.

 

[MMMowman]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QQWgUht-ObI
Beat this (watch the ending)