Am I Really the Minority When it Comes to Sex?

[UberNoodle]

Wanting to have lots of hot sex is an evolutionary advantage, the ones who don't want to have sex don't, therefore don't reproduce, therefore don't pass their not-wanting-to-have-sex genes on to the next generation.

I know you were joking but I have to say 'not really' to your assertion. Promiscuous people (usually) take the various measures required so as to NOT pass on their genetic material, in any meaningful way. If they didn't do this, they wouldn't be promiscous for very long, or they would eventually have a train wreck of a life that would do very little to attract others to join it.

Women are indeed attracted to pricks, literally and figuratively, however, they DO KNOW that when the bio clock starts ticking and starts that chain reaction that sends them hurtlimg toward children, a partner, economic security, and probably marraige; that the bad boy, 'list of hundreds' guy at the pub IS NOT the man to see.

So while a promisuous man might leave a trail of children, they probably all inevitibly end up cursing his name, if they ever know it in the first place. The man that does very little to appease the whims of his lower decision making centre, may have a higher chance to go on to have a family, a few (relatively) balanced kids who are nurtured and supported, and who will probably end up being the promiscuous man's kids' bosses!

 

[Danny Ocean]

I have noticed an assload of teenagers wanting sex. Could never fathom why.

Hormones, of course! Don'tcha just love[footnote]Hate.[/footnote] them!?

Intended life expectancy of humans is about 35, so mid-life baby-wanting crisis occurs around teenagehood, when everyone's more fertile and fit than they will ever be again. Plus sex releases dopamine. Levels of dopamine released are more extreme (Along with all other hormones) during teenagehood, so it feels better than when you get older. Meaning that, once a teen has had a taste, they'll likely want more.

Simples. Like cheap car insurance.

 

[Sneaklemming]

A question I've been dwelling over for some time now. I'm sure we all have noticed the growing promiscuity of teenagers and I'm just wondering, why? Why is sex something that is sought out so much after by any means? It seems like average teen just wants to have sex as soon as possible and doesn't matter who it's with.

Now I'm not saying everyone is like this, just it seems that a lot of people (at least where I live) are.

I've never really been one for the whole sex thing. It's not that I'm gay, don't care or asexual even, I just want to wait for someone I love before I have sex. After reading a few studies and surveys showing that the average person loses their virginity between 15 -17, I can't help wonder if I'm really the only one who wants to wait or if I'm just missing out on it by being so uptight.

Now I will admit that I had sex once in my life. It ended horribly and I deeply regret because I was in love with the girl and it turned out, she didn't even remotely feel the same about me and I'm wondering if I'm the only one who feels it would be best to wait.

Please note that my feelings towards sex has absolutely nothing to do with any religious beliefs. I'm also not saying there should be a certain age or you should wait till marriage. Just until you're actually in love. Not the bullshit that teenagers feel when they like someone, but actual love.

So, Escapist, what are your thoughts on this? Am I just being uptight when it comes to the subject or am I in the right for thinking this?

I'm sure this will have been mentioned already, I havn't read thru the thread.

For many it seems like a "rite of passage" or something that has to happen for you to become an adult. It's like a private club that you can only join after its done.

Of course its none of those things, but people see it like that. Combine this with the many insecurities that teens develop, and you have a goal for many to achieve, to calm their insecurities.

 

[Julianking93]

snip

Yes, it's been mentioned, but what "club" exactly are you joining when you have sex?

The club of immature dickholes who view people as merely sex objects? No, it's just some bullshit used as bragging rights. Hell, I'll bet half, no scratch that, 2/3 of teens claiming to have had sex are probably lying.

 

[tehweave]

Teens want to have sex because they hate being told to wait. Tell a teen to wait, they will want something now. Tell a teen that they can't have something, they will want it. They don't know nor are they aware that most likely your first time will be about 10-20 seconds long and will be sweaty and awkward, but won't listen to you just because... Well... They're a stupid angsty teen. This may sound mean, but I know this is true simply because I used to be the EXACT SAME WAY.
Teens want to have sex because they just do.

 

[Sneaklemming]

snip

Yes, it's been mentioned, but what "club" exactly are you joining when you have sex?

The club of immature dickholes who view people as merely sex objects? No, it's just some bullshit used as bragging rights. Hell, I'll bet half, no scratch that, 2/3 of teens claiming to have had sex are probably lying.

I don't think that that is true of all teens. What you are saying does seem a little harsh...

The "club" was just to help illustrate my point =P

 

[Julianking93]

snip

Not all teens. And I will admit that I can be a little harsh at times when it comes to sensitive subjects like this.

And I know the "club" was just used as a sort of metaphor.

 

[Joshdemon]

I agree with you. I'm against promiscuity (in people of both genders, although what people do is their business) and only sleep with people I'm in a proper relationship with. However, I am actually pretty soppy in a lot of ways lol.

 

[Sneaklemming]

snip

Not all teens. And I will admit that I can be a little harsh at times when it comes to sensitive subjects like this.

And I know the "club" was just used as a sort of metaphor.

Also I know this isnt the place... but my private messaging doesnt work anymore.. no idea why... so can you help me out with this [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.196885-What-anime-is-this-picture-from#6359362] - its really driving me crazy

 

[kwfang]

Your not the only im waiting I have never done anything I have a girlfriend but we have not done anything. For me I want to wait till im married, and doing it when your a teenager is stupid because you could be ruining your future. Is your future worth messing up just for something that will only last a few minutes?

 

[Boris Goodenough]

last a few minutes?

You're doing it wrong then

 

[Sgt Doom]

19, haven't had any sort of relationship. Bleh, got the Internet, I suppose.

 

[Chrono180]

I am still a virgin at 20 (almost 21) and I intend to remain that way until I get a vasectomy. I never want kids, and considering how screwed up I am mentally I think it would be a real cruel thing to have kids because if my mental disorders are inheritable I would be essentially ruining the child's life.

 

[Audioave10]

You are only 16. By the time you are 18, many things will have changed.

 

[Zac Smith]

I still get stick from loasdsa people, n i been with my girlfriend for little over 3 years now

 

[Disconnected]

I am a teenager and I am not remotely interested in dating or sex. I know I am definately in a minority, though, as when I tell people I've never dated or been infatuated, they just think I'm lying. It could be I'm the only one, but I'll bet there are others who don't care all that much, but say they do so they don't appear "abnormal". I would describe myself as an asexual aromantic, but that may change, or may not.

Anyway, I don't think it's "sad" to be a virgin. If you aren't interested in sex, so what? It isn't a requirement.

 

[stok3r]

Sex is very enjoyable. As for the whole "wait till you are in love" how do you know what love is? You say the teens don't but to be honest, neither do you.
You can not say what love is. You do not have that authority.
And yes, your hang ups on sex are more than likely religion based. Like it or not, this societies morals are based on religious crap so even if you do not believe in the religion yourself, the society you grew up in which has these religious morals still influenced your decision.
Also like it or not, being sexually compatible with someone is a big important part to being in a relationship. If you are not sexually compatible then you will not last. So if I want to check around and find out what type of things I like and with who then so be it.

Oh and while I am on the subject I personally believe the "growing promiscuity of teenagers" is a myth too.
Teens have always fucked. Its just that they used to get more back alley abortions. No, I do not mean the wire coat hanger. But specific herbs and shit can force miscarriage. That or they just stuck to oral.
Plus go back even further and it was the way shit was that 13 year olds would get married and fuck.

This pretty much.

I've only ever had 1 girlfriend before (tho I do have a gf now) and I thought I loved her, but well... suffice to say, I didn't really. And I'm glad I didn't fuck her.

Seriously, I have no idea what the fuck love is. For me, love is a VERY heavy word, and should not be said lightly.

More OT: 19 and virgin. Started going out with this girl like, a month ago, and let me tell you, after 10 months of being single after being dumped (yes, thats how long it took to get over her (well, and to find a girl who I like)) I am horny as shit and want to fuck. Tho I'm still thinking about it, its weird.

At 15, I was definitely NOT ready to have sex, and if I did do it, it would've been terrible. Hell, even at 18 I wasn't ready. But now I think I am, but I still don't know if I SHOULD do it.

Half of my problem is a religious upbringing. Now I don't think you should wait till you get married, but I do think you should wait till your in love. If your going to spend the rest of your life with her, its the same as getting married i say.

Marriage is just legal bullshit.

 

[FolkLikePanda]

Meh, I'm 15 and I have had a girlfriend but we never did anything I didn't feel ready wasn't too sure about her though. I'll admit I feel like I wanna bang some girl senseless now and then but I know I'll fuck it up just like nearly everything I do so I guess I'll wait. I'm following Chef's advice and going with the "17, they'll be ready" ideology.

 

[Fox242]

You really are in the minority on this one pal. It's just natural for teenagers to want to do the nasty. It's hardwired into our brains, we can't escape it. It's been on my mind constantly ever since I hit puberty. Although I didn't get laid until last December, I'm 20 by the way, I was always looking to get laid when I was your age. Also, my first time, unlike yours apparently, was wonderful.