Announcements That Could Destroy Gaming Culture

[Blingling]

"Ubisoft's new DRM methods incredible success, to be added to all games from now on"

That would truly be awful as I move a lot and often have limited internet access.

 

[MrPandarium]

In 2015 Miniclip will have purchased every game studio in the world turning them into flash game factories

 

[Jeronus]

We all go blind.

 

[aaronmcc]

All people will now experience at least one QTE a day. Failure = death.

Nintendo Wii so successful that all games will now feature shitty graphics and motion control....oh, snap! Natal, Arc and Wii served. I thank you.

Edge games to sue Oxford English Dictionary for use of the word 'edge'.

 

[camaille]

"Games consoles found to work using neclear ractors now exploding destroing all in a 100 mile radius"

I'll still be playing

 

[nimibro]

the combine invade earth and rule it with ambassador jack thompson, converting gamers into stalkers, giving uwe boll the helm for an HL trilogy and then shuts off valve, eidos and nintendo (and sega).

 

[aaronmcc]

"My fellow Americans today we are close to passing the health care refo ASSUMING CONTROL OF THIS FORM"

Argh! Not the Harbinger again!

assuming control of this forum

 

[Signa]

Diablo 3 has been scrapped and will be remade into a console shooter."

Though it wouldn't be Diablo, and would be an insult to Diablo, I could totally see a first-person version of Diablo 1 being made into a Doom3 like shooter with strong Borderlands overtones. If they could just randomly generate the dungeons, that might be a good idea for a game. I know I'd play it.

OT: World's silicon supply running low. Microchip manufacturing put on hold.

 

[Ralen-Sharr]

Diablo 3 has been scrapped and will be remade into a console shooter."

Though it wouldn't be Diablo, and would be an insult to Diablo, I could totally see a first-person version of Diablo 1 being made into a Doom3 like shooter with strong Borderlands overtones. If they could just randomly generate the dungeons, that might be a good idea for a game. I know I'd play it.

OT: World's silicon supply running low. Microchip manufacturing put on hold.

wasn't that Hellgate: London?

 

[Alphavillain]

"Due to the phenomenal success of the Call Of Duty series, the development of all games that require thought and patience on the part of the gamer and any amount of innovation or originalty on the part of the developer are to be postponed indefinitely. Or left to Nintendo *unintentional laughter* Yours, MicroSoft and Sony."

 

[reg42]

"Your game will have to be activated online, and will have limited installs"
[sub]Oh wait[/sub]

 

[Orcus The Ultimate]

"All gaming developers and publishers are ruined! the gaming industry will be no more"

or worst "Nintendo has bought every single gaming company"

 

[edinflames]

"Microsoft announces it is no longer supporting the PC as a gaming platform, and all gaming PC's will be rendered obsolete in two weeks"

That is just about the worst thing I can imagine.

It would be fine if I liked consoles...but I just don't.

 

[Lullabye]

"Duke Nukem Forever To be released exclusively for Wii. Nintendo reports record Sales, whilst Sony and Microsoft report record losses."

 

[Spiner909]

"Today, due to the poor national economy, the government if forcing its way into the best market in the world, one that is recession proof. Yes, the government is invading the games market. All future games released are now 1000x the price."

 

[asgardmothership]

"Ninja Gaiden Sigma 2 to Feature Boob Motion control". No one could possibly put this in place just when gaming is trying to become a mature mainstream entertainment franchise.... oh wait...

 

[Sallix]

"Osama Bin Laden blames his violent behaviour on video games"

 

[benjtfell]

They can and do happen, to varying extents. But what can you see ushering in the Gamepocalypse? Here's mine:

"Uwe Boll to Direct Half-Life Film Trilogy"

Valve would never let that happen

 

[lacktheknack]

"Nuclear Launch Detected."

It... It... haunts my DREAMS...

"Bioware, Activision/Blizzard, and Valve have simultaneously gone bankrupt..."

 

[Spiner909]

Ooh, even better! "Prothean ruins have been discovered on Mars today..."