Kahnmir said:
I think it's people wanting a partner who shares their interests and keep hammering on about it.
Another angle on the whole 'geek girls' thing.
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I think it's people wanting a partner who shares their interests and keep hammering on about it.
Waaait a minute.Girl With One Eye said:
Stereotypes are stereotypes for a reason, why else would they be? Yes there can be very attractive geeky women out there. However gender aside that's just how the dice rolls for people.
I think it's a little unfair to call someone "Shallow and picky" because he doesn't find someone attractive.
Who are you really to get online and judge someone by such a small window into their personal preference?
Most of the "Geek Girls" I meet are basically what you described. My now-ex is the same; attractive and knowledgeable about so many different things and she was Dungeon Master in our D&D games. In fact, now that I get to thinking about it, about a third of my friends that are girls are "Geek Girls". And it's fucking awesome.
http://www.wired.com/gamelife/2007/02/female_gamers_h
Just thought it was vaguely relevant.
Also, I admit there are probably loads out there, but I've met like 1 in my life that plays video games regularly, she was a big Halo fan and from the US. But that's it, I'm just going from experience but I think it might be a UK thing because it seems like there's a real stigma about it amongst girls I know.
Just thought it was vaguely relevant.
Also, I admit there are probably loads out there, but I've met like 1 in my life that plays video games regularly, she was a big Halo fan and from the US. But that's it, I'm just going from experience but I think it might be a UK thing because it seems like there's a real stigma about it amongst girls I know.
The subjective nature of attractiveness aside, the OP has a certain point when you look at attractiveness as being what makes females essentially feminine. The key defining feature of "geek girls" is that they are intelligent, and this leads to a certain disposition towards making up their own minds about certain things. For many, they embrace things like feminism, which traditionally eschew habits which would work towards this essentialist viewpoint of female attractiveness.
It's an ultimate catch-22 situation: Are intelligent girls "ugly" because they let themselves go as they are less concerned with being "attractive"; or are they intelligent because they are "ugly" and less concerned with being "attractive"?
A beauty regimen, and indeed, it is a regimen that can take some time and thus diminish the time for other pursuits in today's increasingly demanding society, and it can be next to impossible to be both "attractive" and "intelligent" to a significantly high degree.
As originally stated, these qualities are subjective - so low standards for such qualities means that both are possible, if you accept low standards as the norm. However, because of current media and society, low standards are rarely considered the norm unless you are actually comparing people to other people, rather than the fictional images we see in the images around us that are trying to convince us to aspire to impossible ideals that we simply cannot meet.
It's an ultimate catch-22 situation: Are intelligent girls "ugly" because they let themselves go as they are less concerned with being "attractive"; or are they intelligent because they are "ugly" and less concerned with being "attractive"?
A beauty regimen, and indeed, it is a regimen that can take some time and thus diminish the time for other pursuits in today's increasingly demanding society, and it can be next to impossible to be both "attractive" and "intelligent" to a significantly high degree.
As originally stated, these qualities are subjective - so low standards for such qualities means that both are possible, if you accept low standards as the norm. However, because of current media and society, low standards are rarely considered the norm unless you are actually comparing people to other people, rather than the fictional images we see in the images around us that are trying to convince us to aspire to impossible ideals that we simply cannot meet.
Has anyone seen the Snorg t-shirt ads? The ones with the archetypal 'dorky' looking girls, who aren't so much dorks as--how do I put this in scientific terms?--compressed singularities of ultra-cute particles.
Squirrel, if you want a girlfriend like that go date a model. Most people just aren't so gorgeous. Most are average, some are passingly handsome/pretty when the occasion demands. A few are hideous, probably even deformed. The thing you have to understand about geek girls is that to some degree it's a manufactured image, a fantasy that leaves real ladies to fill the somewhat ridiculous mold.
Here is a dreamgirl who's smart but not arrogant, quirky but not annoying, sexy but demure about it. She holds a Master's in something, has a steady part-time job, cool parents and no crazy ex's. She reads books 350 pages every 2 hours and sometimes finishes your homework for you. She games as obsessively as you, and almost always in her underwear. She's hard-working, but the only thing you see her eat is yogurt and cereal, which makes you wonder where the rest of her energy comes from. And when she kisses you, she does it quick and clever and all you taste is strawberry mint. The aesthetic is that this woman is the ideal girlfriend; tech savvy, financially responsible, shy and inexperienced in the bedroom yet somehow sexually responsible too... perfect in every way.
My question is: What angle are we looking at this from? Because in the case of 'geek girls' you can glue a horn to a horse, but that doesn't necessarily make it a unicorn.
Squirrel, if you want a girlfriend like that go date a model. Most people just aren't so gorgeous. Most are average, some are passingly handsome/pretty when the occasion demands. A few are hideous, probably even deformed. The thing you have to understand about geek girls is that to some degree it's a manufactured image, a fantasy that leaves real ladies to fill the somewhat ridiculous mold.
Here is a dreamgirl who's smart but not arrogant, quirky but not annoying, sexy but demure about it. She holds a Master's in something, has a steady part-time job, cool parents and no crazy ex's. She reads books 350 pages every 2 hours and sometimes finishes your homework for you. She games as obsessively as you, and almost always in her underwear. She's hard-working, but the only thing you see her eat is yogurt and cereal, which makes you wonder where the rest of her energy comes from. And when she kisses you, she does it quick and clever and all you taste is strawberry mint. The aesthetic is that this woman is the ideal girlfriend; tech savvy, financially responsible, shy and inexperienced in the bedroom yet somehow sexually responsible too... perfect in every way.
My question is: What angle are we looking at this from? Because in the case of 'geek girls' you can glue a horn to a horse, but that doesn't necessarily make it a unicorn.
Hah, that was a brilliant description, though I doubt his idea was as specific down to the taste of her gum...or quite as arousinghooksashands said:
."Why do girls get upset when I say they're ugly ? After all, they are !"Sparrow said:
Because pointing out things in people that are generally considered flaws is a classic form of insult, and needs to be done with delicacy in order not to come across that way.
And that's when the charge is accurate. When it's based on extremely poor sampling methods it requires even more delicacy. To his credit it looks as if the OP realizes there were some issues there. Good for him.
Ooooh ! We have anecDATA ! Now we're cooking with charcoal.Sparrow said:
Yep. That reason isn't always "there's a grain of truth to it", though. It can be. I don't know to what extent it is and isn't in this case. (in my experience, because this appears to be sharing time, I've found the geeks of both genders to be as attractive as ordinary people. I even tend to find geeks more attractive, but that might just be because I like them more. I don't assume my experience is representative of the population at large though) But it would be wrong to assume stereotypes are always based on truth.Lyri said:
Well, the prime example of a geek girl I've met is my girlfriend, and she is stunning to behold, so I'm afraid I cannot relate, OP.
Well, in the 'weight problems' category, I have found one gamer girl, and I can call into question her claim to being a gamer, as opposed to being, say, a girl who co-owns a game or two with her boyfriend. For the most part, the only part of that description the gamer girls in my experience have matched is the terrible choice of clothing. The others have actually been *very* physically attractive.similar.squirrel said:
Bad luck? Advice: reset, go again.
Unless you can tell their interests (In this case, videogames) simply by looking at them, you clearly can't make that generalisation. All I have to do is go to my Maths and Physics department at University and see a variety of people, all geeks or nerds of some sort (Whether it be video games, science etc) and see a spectrum of fit people, attractive people, and otherwise, of both genders. I hang out with some other people, most of whom are pretty keen on Anime. The same thing pops up. Unless you KNOW everyone, you can't know that of the people you've met who you found attractive, there aren't some who are "Geeky" or "Gamer". On a side note: if you're looking for "Gamer Girls" then you'd be rightfully labelled a creep. Most people don't like being idolised as some fetish, it's worrying. People don't need to be gamers to "get" gaming, so clearly, wasting your time looking for some idealisation of some hopeless fantasy is a waste of your time.
Hi, I'm at university right now, I have become friends with some 20 girls in the last week or so (I mean friends, not acquaintances). Of them I have I think 5 who are 'geek girls'. All of them are pretty damned attractive (varying from a "yes" to an "oh my god please yes I will sell my leg for you").
So...not that elusive as far as I can tell. Certainly not unattractive. Could be I'm just lucky mind.
So...not that elusive as far as I can tell. Certainly not unattractive. Could be I'm just lucky mind.
Quite frankly (and this is just my observation so it is not a general application), a lot of geek girls tend to prioritize their life around things that they believe are most important to them. For many, looks, style of clothing, their environment (where they spend most of their days), is not as important to them as other aspect of their life. Thus, while being attractive individuals, they are not always physically appealing. But that's not always the case.
I was good friends with a geek chick when I began high school. I had some 'bad' experiences with girls in the previous year, so she was the first girl who I could be comfortable around. Though she was fun to be with, she never struck me as being hot.
A few years passed and we remained friends, but we were apart for one summer and when we met again, I was shocked at her new look. I almost didn't recognize her; what's more, I fell in love with her for the first time. She forever remained my first love.
In short, geek chicks (or any for that matter) are attractive deep down and if you display interest in them, they slowly begin to realize that YOU are a priority to them, and they might change slightly to show that you are important to them.
I was good friends with a geek chick when I began high school. I had some 'bad' experiences with girls in the previous year, so she was the first girl who I could be comfortable around. Though she was fun to be with, she never struck me as being hot.
A few years passed and we remained friends, but we were apart for one summer and when we met again, I was shocked at her new look. I almost didn't recognize her; what's more, I fell in love with her for the first time. She forever remained my first love.
In short, geek chicks (or any for that matter) are attractive deep down and if you display interest in them, they slowly begin to realize that YOU are a priority to them, and they might change slightly to show that you are important to them.
Excellent story and proves the point. Personally my own girlfriend and I were compatible on a personality level before we ever actually thought of eachother as attractive/dating material. Neither of us are models, but I think we've both found our physical tastes changed as we've grown closer. We're more attracted to eachother physically than we were when we began.CrimsonBlaze said:
In a sense, I wouldn't be surprised if some 'geek/gamer girls' that the OP is dreading over don't dress how they dress just a bit on purpose. I think by and large everyone here can agree that someone can be as attractive as they like, but if the personalities don't click or that person is just downright revolting in attitude, no amount of big boobs or firm abs are gonna help things. I could see where intentionally playing your physical side down a little might be able to help you tell what a person is attracted to: your body or you.
After reading the first page I think I know how to solve this problem;
Massive black geek glasses.
[sub]oh don't look at me that way, they're hot...[/sub]
Massive black geek glasses.
[sub]oh don't look at me that way, they're hot...[/sub]
If its any conciliation, I find overweight, smelly men equally as disgusting as overweight smelly women! Look at me being all politically correct and stuff!Jesus Phish said:
Firstly, I'm not calling you or anyone on this forum ugly. I've not seen your faces, I'd never simply assume you were ugly. I also have to make it pretty darn clear that I'm not saying "all geeky girls are ugly" - I'm saying all the geeky girls I've seen are ugly. There's a huge difference.Caravelle said:
Secondly, this is still true whichever way you look at. You might have not thought they were ugly, because apparently I am some lesser mortal who isn't able to date anyone who is not to my liking, but I did. The girls I've met are complete fuggos. And I know that isn't the most charming way of putting it, but goddamn. It's not like they even need to slather make-up on their faces or wear the latest fashionable brands - a comb through their hair in the morning and a womanly shave every now and again would have done it for me.Caravelle said:
