Best Quotes from anywhere?
- Thread starter caprisun
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People don`t kill people, guns kill people. And monkeys do too(if they have a gun)- Eddie Izzard.
Nooo, ewerything is bad. I will send a flood for 40 days and 40 night and lots of umbrellas- Eddie Izzard
Well, pretty much everything Eddie says is a quote because he is that awesome.
Nooo, ewerything is bad. I will send a flood for 40 days and 40 night and lots of umbrellas- Eddie Izzard
Well, pretty much everything Eddie says is a quote because he is that awesome.
"The wise man speaks because he has something to say, the fool because he has to say something"
- Aristotle
- Aristotle
It is good that war is so terrible, lest we come to like it too much.
-Robert E. Lee
My enemy is in front of me, my enemy is behind me, my enemy is on my flanks, I HAVE HIM RIGHT WHERE I WANT HIM!
-unknown
And finally, the single best line spoken by a computer of all time:
Slavic: "CABAL, define 'favorable outcome'"
CABAL: "They all die."
-Robert E. Lee
My enemy is in front of me, my enemy is behind me, my enemy is on my flanks, I HAVE HIM RIGHT WHERE I WANT HIM!
-unknown
And finally, the single best line spoken by a computer of all time:
Slavic: "CABAL, define 'favorable outcome'"
CABAL: "They all die."
"How does it feel Preston?"
"You're born, you keep your head down, then you die."
"This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then - explode."
"Look you stupid bastard you're got no arms left!"
"- Yes I have!"
"Would you kindly?"
"You're born, you keep your head down, then you die."
"This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then - explode."
"Look you stupid bastard you're got no arms left!"
"- Yes I have!"
"Would you kindly?"
To my buddy Shawn, the Firefighter.
"Now that you're a fire fighter, I have to know... Is it best to fight fire with fire?"
"Now that you're a fire fighter, I have to know... Is it best to fight fire with fire?"
"What the hell does it all mean anyhow? Nothing. Zero. Zilch. Nothing comes to anything. And yet, there's no shortage of idiots to babble. Not me. I have a vision. I'm discussing you. Your friends. Your coworkers. Your newspapers. The TV. Everybody's happy to talk. Full of misinformation. Morality, science, religion, politics, sports, love, your portfolio, your children, health. Christ, if I have to eat nine servings of fruits and vegetables a day to live, I don't wanna live. I hate goddamn fruits and vegetables. And your omega 3's, and the treadmill, and the cardiogram, and the mammogram, and the pelvic sonogram, and oh my god the-the-the colonoscopy, and with it all the day still comes where they put you in a box, and its on to the next generation of idiots, who'll also tell you all about life and define for you what's appropriate. My father committed suicide because the morning newspapers depressed him. And could you blame him? With the horror, and corruption, and ignorance, and poverty, and genocide, and AIDS, and global warming, and terrorism, and-and the family value morons, and the gun morons. "The horror," Kurtz said at the end of Heart of Darkness, "the horror." Lucky Kurtz didn't have the Times delivered in the jungle. Ugh... then he'd see some horror. But what do you do? You read about some massacre in Darfur or some school bus gets blown up, and you go "Oh my God, the horror," and then you turn the page and finish your eggs from the free range chickens. Because what can you do. It's overwhelming! I tried to commit suicide myself. Obviously, it didn't work out. But why do you even want to hear about all this? Christ, you got your own problems. I'm sure your all obsessed with any number of sad little hopes and dreams. Your predictably unsatisfying love lives, your failed business ventures. "Oh, if only I'd bought that stock! If only I-if only I purchased THAT house years ago! If only I'd made a move on THAT woman." If this, if that. You know what? Gimmie a break with your could have's and should have's. Like my mother used to say, "If my grandmother had wheels, she'd be a trolley car." My mother didn't have wheels. She had varicose veins. Still, the woman gave birth to a brilliant mind. I was considered for a Nobel Prize in physics... I didn't get it. But, you know, its all politics. It's like every other phony honor. Incidentally, don't think I'm-I'm bitter because of some personal setback. By the standards of a mindless, barbaric civilization, I've been pretty lucky. I was married to a beautiful woman who had family money. For years we lived on Beekman Place. I taught at Columbia. String theory."
The opening monologue to Whatever Works.
The opening monologue to Whatever Works.
