Cheating on People

[Aedes]

I never understood the psychology behind cheating. If you are in a relationship with someone then you should stick with them, the need to pursue someone else is irrational to me. If things are not working out between two people then they should talk it out and if all else fails, break up. Having another partner by the side is never a solution.

Emotions are irrational. It's something that escapes our field of logic being only understandable if you use some biological arguments such as procriation.

Now, back on topic,

What do you guys think of cheating?

I think it's a terrible thing to do. A total and complete jerk way to hurt the person you supposely love.
Ofc, that's a view from someone who's inside a relationship and see his partner jumping the fence.

I'm also interested on what passes on the other guy/gal mind. I'm quite sure the majority of people here wouldn't like at all for his partner to betray you but what if you're the one outside the relation? Let's just say you're crazy for someone who's dating and fate plays a trick allowing you to have this person for a moment. You're aware that the person would be betraying his partner and you agree that's an awfull move of his/her, yet, you're crazy for the person. What to do?

Honestly, I seriously don't know.

 

[teisjm]

What the OP said.

I think the reason people do it, is because they wanna haev sex with someone otehr than their partner, but still be with their partner.
I guess theres just a lot of selfish people out there, who can't even figure out how to be respectful, even to the people they say they love.

 

[Assassin Xaero]

I'd never do it... mostly because it just seems wrong to me, and if I actually cared enough about someone to be in a relationship with them, I wouldn't want to hurt them like that...

 

[FranzTyphid]

no i would break up with them if i loved someone else

 

[Arcanz]

Also, if true love exists, why is it always with someone you find physically attractive?

Because who wants to spend the rest of their life with someone ugly?

God damn I love the Escapist, I can laugh my ass of whole day long. Most of the stuff here is so true it's hilarious. Woodsey, I totally agree with you, you don't want to spend your life with someone ugly. But, if you do find someone amazing and don't care about beauty that much, you will see that person become more and more attractive as time passes by. I don't know how that works, or if it is like that for everyone.

But same goes for family, I had some family members who don't look good at all. After a while, they just seemed like normal people, and you don't care about looks anymore.
Not saying I'm in love with my family members. But what I do try to explain is that people you personally think has a lousy personality will become less attractive, and people who are awesome do become more attractive.

On to the cheating part, nooooooooooooo, I would never do that. I hate people who cheat, I despise them. I think it's highly immoral and a lousy thing to do.

 

[coldshadow]

cheaters deserve to be turned into bugs, and then steped on!

 

[SonicWaffle]

I hate people who cheat it seems like a waste of time if they won't bother to commit to their partner. the only thing I hate more is the excuses they give if they are caught and when they try and say sorry but if they truly felt sorry then they would not have cheated in the first place.

What if it's just a massage that gets out of hand?

I hope that was a joke :/

 

[MikeOfThunder]

I was cheated on once... hurt more then i thought it would.

 

[ToMegaTherion]

It's bad, really fucking bad, but life is never "black or white."

 

[cuddly_tomato]

I hate people who cheat it seems like a waste of time if they won't bother to commit to their partner. the only thing I hate more is the excuses they give if they are caught and when they try and say sorry but if they truly felt sorry then they would not have cheated in the first place.

What if it's just a massage that gets out of hand?

I hope that was a joke :/

Of course it was.. kinda.

Sometimes, in the course of human passion, things can go too far. Guys... don't you ever slyly eye up other women? Allow certain things to cross your mind when you do it? Things can happen. A stressful day, a few drinks, a sympathetic and attractive lady giving you her attention. It is easy to be faithful when typing at your PC, but doing it while being "offered the goods" is quite a bit more difficult.

 

[Arkhangelsk]

If somebody ever cheated on me, I wouldn't be able to look them in the eyes anymore. It's just such a betrayal, and not breaking up before just shows that you don't have any common decency.

 

[RagingScottsman]

PS: If you're going to be a dick and not add to discussion, then don't post.

I won't be a dick, but I will however do something similar and play devil's advocate. Given the nature of the topic, doing such is rather invaluable. Otherwise you'll end up with three pages of people saying that cheating is bad (which we already know to be true).

I will simply say that I have cheated once, only once, and never shall again. I had been with my girlfriend for a year and a half, and was seeing several changes in her that were quite frankly unacceptable. So for comfort and advice I turned to my best friend, who just so happened to be a very attractive young lady, and who also happened to be my girlfriend's best friend. My friend's suggestion was a seemingly innocent enough trip out of state for the weekend. Well after a day and a few glasses of wine I foolishly chose to accept an advancement from my friend. Understand, that I had already decided to break up with my current girlfriend, this happened after the fact and had no bearing on my choice. Anyway, we finished up our alone time and headed back home, my hand in hers the whole way, feeling happier than I had in almost a year.

I'll spare everyone and cut the last bit short. Basically, the very day we got back home, we got caught by my girlfriend. After that, my new relationship only lasted a few short months before I found out that she was cheating on me. Big shock, right? Oh, well. Best I can do now is chalk it up as a lesson learned.

To summerize, VG, I would say that sometimes it's out of desperation. I felt the pressure from a bad relationship and made some very poor choices; choices that I assure you I never thought I would make.

 

[Laura.]

It's the worst thing you can ever do to your partner. It makes you feel worthless.
A cheater can't be trusted, forgiven or ever again looked at in the eye. There's no possible excuse for that behaviour, it only shows selfishness.
If someone really loves you he/she will never cheat on you.

 

[Haunted Serenity]

I've cheated and been cheated on. Yeah it sucks but whatever. Usually it's because the other person thought it was a good idea at the time and then it turned out of hand. Or they were so wasted they couldn't find their own arse with two hands and a map.

I cheated because 1) i was pissed off and away from her all the time so i just threw myself out there
2)because i really did like and still do like the girl and she likes me still but neither of us want to leave our loved ones for each other. Probaly because our loved ones have threated to kill themselves if we do so.

 

[Cilliandrew]

Eh, i have accepted that the impulse to cheat is purely a biological urge that is part of our genetic program.

I think every male has the urge to screw the living daylights out of anything that moves purely to procreate. We want to spread our seed as far and as fast as possible.

In a similar fashion, women are programmed to want to mate with anything they find attractive because they are programmed to identify the most worthy companion, from a physical perspective.


Whether you have the will power to combat these natural biological urges is the question, but i think as you get older you start to understand a bit more about how we are really just animals with biological urges that sometimes override what seems to be good sense.

 

[mechanixis]

Basically, if you ever feel a such a serious compulsion to cheat that you act on it, you're in a relationship for all the wrong reasons. Relationships are about validation through mutual commitment, and cheating is like saying "Yeah, no, you're not really all that special to me, but I'm still that special to you, right?"

 

[Davey Woo]

I don't see why people do it, I can't comprehend the reasons for it.
If you're in a relationship with someone, they should be all that matters, if you start having feelings for someone else, then you shouldn't try and stay in the current relationship.