Corrupt a Wish game

[baseracer]

Granted, but a comet hits you instead.

I wish that I had an Atari Jaguar.

 

[Stone Wera]

Granted. But you can't play any games on it and it combusts if you try.

I wish nothing hit me...

 

[cryogeist]

granted nothing hit you quite hard knocking you back

i wish for a airsoft gun

 

[BrailleOperatic]

Granted, but it's a soft gun made of air.

I wish to have friends...

 

[cryogeist]

granted they are Hitler satin and pedobear
i wish for a new warhammer 40k land speeder model

 

[BrailleOperatic]

Granted, but you have no glue so you can't ever assemble it.

I wish the real world was free of stupid people.

 

[cryogeist]

granted you disappear(no offence)
i wish i was dead

 

[BrailleOperatic]

Granted. But the afterlife is exactly like duringlife and pick up from where you left off.

I wish I had a time machine.

 

[cryogeist]

granted you go back in time but mess up the time line everyone you know and love is dead
i wish i had more warhammer40k games

 

[Stone Wera]

Granted. They're all copies of the same game!

I wish I didn't have to make a wish.

 

[Zacharine]

Granted. The wish-giving genie attempts to drive you mad for a few weeks, before getting bored and rips out your soul for being such a bore.

I wish there were no more wars in the entire universe.

 

[Stone Wera]

Granted. Now people have baby seal clubbing competitions to see who wins.

I wish I could fire mah lasers.

 

[cryogeist]

granted they fire bounce off a mirror and hit your head
i wish for the cake to not be a lie

 

[Stone Wera]

Granted. Now it's a fabrication of the truth.

EDIT: I wish I didn't forget to post a wish.

 

[kaveradeo]

Granted you die.
I wish for pencils to not get lost.

 

[VeX1le]

Granted they now end up inside your brain.

I wish i wasn't bored to death.

 

[Rasputin1]

Granted, you're still bored, just very much alive.

I wish for a doomsday device capable of destroying all ocean dwelling creatures.

 

[Nouw]

Granted, except you have to fix it in order for it to work.

 

[Vrex360]

Granted, except you forgot to leave a wish here so I viciously kill you with an energy sword.

I wish that Ashley in Mass Effect was more popular so I could happily say I like her without having people flame me for it.

 

[Rasputin1]

Granted. She is now the internets biggest meme.

I wish I wasn't so addicted to caramelldansen right now.