Duke Nukem Forever (full game). Duration: 8 hours.

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Tinneh

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Pedro The Hutt said:
Tinneh said:
You can't ruin my fun, Aussie.

I'm going to buy this and enjoy it, you cannot steal my fun.

The only way you're getting my fun is if you rip it from my dead, cold, pale, Irish hands.
There there, your powers of denial will wane eventually and the reality will kick in.

And oh good, you don't like Duke Nukem Forever, remember kids, according to the CEO of Gearbox, Randy Pitchford you are not a real gamer [http://www.gamefront.com/gearboxs-randy-pitchford-reviewers-who-dont-like-duke-nukem-forever-will-be-held-accountable/], I myself have come to enjoy being a fake gamer with standards.
I like how only a few people in the comments box and myself realized that Pitchford was marketing this as Duke would - as the greatest game of all time, and if you don't like it, go fuck yourself - like that.
 

Worgen

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Whatever, just wash your hands.
Im gonna blame consoles for this since they didnt have as many buttons to work with as they wanted, consoles and poor choices of control options
 

Genixma

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So basically like every anticipated game it gets released for people to complain about it. Well then on a side note I am happy I've never taken interest in a Duke game. Except for the first Duke. But that was when I was a young lad.
 

Pedro The Hutt

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Yup, but he now nearly wins by default.

(And I still wonder why most of the die-hard Duke defenders these days are people who are too young to even remember DN3D releasing, let alone being old enough to be allowed to play it when it was still a relevant game...)
 

Urh

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Cleariously said:
Guess it's all down to Serious Sam now, huh?
Who would've thought that the shameless rip-off of Duke Nukem would now be set to become his spiritual successor?
 
Apr 28, 2008
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You know, I at least wished that the game would be either really, really bad, or really really good.

But to spend 13 years in development just to come out mediocre? That... that just sucks. At least if it was really horrible it'd be notable in some way.

We lost one of gaming's best jokes to mediocrity. Son of a *****.
 

Keldon888

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Well... that is unfortunate... guess I'll install Serious Sam and wait for that to come out in the future.
 

shrekfan246

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May 26, 2011
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Tinneh said:
Pedro The Hutt said:
Tinneh said:
You can't ruin my fun, Aussie.

I'm going to buy this and enjoy it, you cannot steal my fun.

The only way you're getting my fun is if you rip it from my dead, cold, pale, Irish hands.
There there, your powers of denial will wane eventually and the reality will kick in.

And oh good, you don't like Duke Nukem Forever, remember kids, according to the CEO of Gearbox, Randy Pitchford you are not a real gamer [http://www.gamefront.com/gearboxs-randy-pitchford-reviewers-who-dont-like-duke-nukem-forever-will-be-held-accountable/], I myself have come to enjoy being a fake gamer with standards.
I like how only a few people in the comments box and myself realized that Pitchford was marketing this as Duke would - as the greatest game of all time, and if you don't like it, go fuck yourself - like that.
Exactly. And to be honest, if you're expecting a game to be held up completely by graphics and gameplay in this day and age, go back to the corner and play with your toy train-set. So DNF apparently takes gameplay elements from most other FPS', so what? How is it that people still think there is innovation to be had in the gameplay of an FPS? Everything has been done before. The appeal of this game is supposed to be in the attitude, not the fact that the Duke can only carry two weapons and doesn't zoom around at the speed of a Maserati MC12.

EDIT: And if it had kept the classical gameplay elements that Duke Nukem had (back in 1996), it would still have been lambasted by critics. To quote a certain charismatic stallion (From his Mortal Kombat review), it would have been struggling for relevance in this day and age. And most reviewers would probably see it as a Serious Sam rip-off with more tits.
 

Innegativeion

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Irridium said:
You know, I at least wished that the game would be either really, really bad, or really really good.

But to spend 13 years in development just to come out mediocre? That... that just sucks. At least if it was really horrible it'd be notable in some way.
Yeesh, Yahtzee is going to gloat the hell outta himself in the duke nukem review. The OP's description of it is almost EXACTLY the same as Yahtzee's prediction of it.
 

Outright Villainy

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Worgen said:
Im gonna blame consoles for this since they didnt have as many buttons to work with as they wanted, consoles and poor choices of control options
It's dem dang consoles again, destroying all that's good and wholesome in the world. Next they'll be takin' our women folk!

Honestly though...
Is this... is this like the absolute response to anything negative with games for some people? Consoles this, consoles that. What is this, the freaking nineties?
 

Urh

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shrekfan246 said:
Exactly. And to be honest, if you're expecting a game to be held up completely by graphics and gameplay in this day and age, go back to the corner and play with your toy train-set. So DNF apparently takes gameplay elements from most other FPS', so what? How is it that people still think there is innovation to be had in the gameplay of an FPS? Everything has been done before. The appeal of this game is supposed to be in the attitude, not the fact that the Duke can only carry two weapons and doesn't zoom around at the speed of a Maserati MC12.
The gameplay mechanics are key to the game's "attitude." In DN3D, Duke was a badass packing an over-the-top arsenal that could deal with just about anything. Duke being only capable of carrying two guns at a time in DNF detracts massively from his original (and quite frankly comical) badassery. Add to that the fact that the regenerating health system effectively rewards cowardice and well......DNF's Duke looks like a complete ***** compared to the one in DN3D. Duke panting like he's got lung cancer after sprinting for 20 yards doesn't help with the whole badass image, either.
 

Worgen

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Whatever, just wash your hands.
Outright Villainy said:
Worgen said:
Im gonna blame consoles for this since they didnt have as many buttons to work with as they wanted, consoles and poor choices of control options
It's dem dang consoles again, destroying all that's good and wholesome in the world. Next they'll be takin' our women folk!

Honestly though...
Is this... is this like the absolute response to anything negative with games for some people? Consoles this, consoles that. What is this, the freaking nineties?
actualy in this case I think it might really be their fault, I was reading some dev stuff about it and they said they didnt have enough buttons to do more then a couple weapons since they wanted to have quick use items and such, so as I said, I think its cause of consoles and them not being creative with the controls
 

Netrigan

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Urh said:
Cleariously said:
Guess it's all down to Serious Sam now, huh?
Who would've thought that the shameless rip-off of Duke Nukem would now be set to become his spiritual successor?
So, we're hoping for a repeat of Saints Row.

Seems so odd that you don't have more arcade style shooters.
 

AWDMANOUT

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Take a look, Valve. Postponing for years on a project then finally promising a release =/= good game.
 

shrekfan246

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Urh said:
shrekfan246 said:
Exactly. And to be honest, if you're expecting a game to be held up completely by graphics and gameplay in this day and age, go back to the corner and play with your toy train-set. So DNF apparently takes gameplay elements from most other FPS', so what? How is it that people still think there is innovation to be had in the gameplay of an FPS? Everything has been done before. The appeal of this game is supposed to be in the attitude, not the fact that the Duke can only carry two weapons and doesn't zoom around at the speed of a Maserati MC12.
The gameplay mechanics are key to the game's "attitude." In DN3D, Duke was a badass packing an over-the-top arsenal that could deal with just about anything. Duke being only capable of carrying two guns at a time in DNF detracts massively from his almost comical badassery. Add to that the fact that the regenerating health system effectively rewards cowardice and well......DNF's Duke looks like a complete ***** compared to the one in DN3D. Duke panting like he's got lung cancer after sprinting for 20 yards also doesn't help with the whole badass image, either.
I'm with you on the last bit, but I honestly don't care about the other two. Have you tried to play Quake 4 recently? Sure it's not difficult, but it's annoying as hell to get through a firefight with only 10 health left and no armor and then have to reload from your last save because you went into another room and instantly got killed because you literally had no way of getting any health back (either by backtracking or trying to find a health terminal further ahead).

Yeah, regenerating health is unrealistic, but if anyone could heal bullet wounds by channeling the masculinity of their neck muscles, I'd expect it to be Duke Nukem.

And carrying only two weapons? Okay, admittedly, such a muscle-bound freak should probably be able to carry a small armory but again, it's not something that would break a game for me.
 

Outright Villainy

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Worgen said:
Outright Villainy said:
Worgen said:
Im gonna blame consoles for this since they didnt have as many buttons to work with as they wanted, consoles and poor choices of control options
It's dem dang consoles again, destroying all that's good and wholesome in the world. Next they'll be takin' our women folk!

Honestly though...
Is this... is this like the absolute response to anything negative with games for some people? Consoles this, consoles that. What is this, the freaking nineties?
actualy in this case I think it might really be their fault, I was reading some dev stuff about it and they said they didnt have enough buttons to do more then a couple weapons since they wanted to have quick use items and such, so as I said, I think its cause of consoles and them not being creative with the controls
It's entirely the latter. Just look at Half life 2 or Bioshock for good examples of how to handle multiple weapon systems in console games. Blaming consoles for restricting them is them just making lame excuses. If they said it was a design decision: fine. I wouldn't like it, but at least they'd have a good reason. Blaming controllers? Bullshit. It's easily serviceable with the dpad, that's what it's bloody there for.
 

Griphphin

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I wasn't really marking my calender for it, personally.
The most interesting thing this game will give me will be Yahtzee's re-review of it *on pins and/or needles*
 

Worgen

Follower of the Glorious Sun Butt.
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Apr 1, 2009
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Whatever, just wash your hands.
Outright Villainy said:
Worgen said:
Outright Villainy said:
Worgen said:
Im gonna blame consoles for this since they didnt have as many buttons to work with as they wanted, consoles and poor choices of control options
It's dem dang consoles again, destroying all that's good and wholesome in the world. Next they'll be takin' our women folk!

Honestly though...
Is this... is this like the absolute response to anything negative with games for some people? Consoles this, consoles that. What is this, the freaking nineties?
actualy in this case I think it might really be their fault, I was reading some dev stuff about it and they said they didnt have enough buttons to do more then a couple weapons since they wanted to have quick use items and such, so as I said, I think its cause of consoles and them not being creative with the controls
It's entirely the latter. Just look at Half life 2 or Bioshock for good examples of how to handle multiple weapon systems in console games. Blaming consoles for restricting them is them just making lame excuses. If they said it was a design decision: fine. I wouldn't like it, but at least they'd have a good reason. Blaming controllers? Bullshit. It's easily serviceable with the dpad, that's what it's bloody there for.
you see those dont have the items that duke does, like the holoduke and such which they still included and I guess couldnt figure out a quick way to use those and more then 2 weapons