Dumbest Way You Have Hurt Yourself

[interspark]

was running along a low wall when looking over my shoulder suddenly seemed like a pretty good idea, i was in crutches for weeks, the stupid thing was that everyone at school said i was faking it (jeeeeealous)

 

[Spawny0908]

I was trying to pry something open when I was younger and instead of using a dull butter knife I got a steak knife. (stupid I know) The knife slipped and I damn near stabbed myself in the chest. No I didn't hurt myself but if I did it would've been a really bad injury for a really dumb reason.

 

[zane224]

I once threw my back out by sneezing

 

[Quick Ben]

I was drilling a hole through something thin (can't remember what,) but it wouldn't stay properly in place. I wanted the hole to be perfect so I figured I'd hold the thing in place with my thumb on the other side. I thought that if I just drilled carefully enough it would be okay. That turned out not to be the case...
It didn't hurt though... But the feeling of the drill going around in my thumb was one of the most nauseating things I've ever felt...

 

[ManiacRaccoon]

I often get angry and squeeze my mobile phone in my hand. It retaliates by being a solid object, thusly hurting my own hand. I f**king hate my mobile phone.

Nerf makes game controllers, ask them about a phone.

Mostly my "dumb" injuries result when I am too happy and I start juggling remotes or running after the phone. During an incident of the latter, a rug I had long since taken for granted as a stationary object slipped out from under me, resulting in my slipping forward so that I landed chest-first on the very corner of the desk the phone was sitting on. It hurt, but I wasn't bleeding and I had a huge bruise, but no apparent long term damage. Though I was convinced for a few days that I had pushed two of my ribs farther apart, as I felt the very end go between them (though not enough to puncture even my t-shirt), however since I have felt no ill effects I'm pretty sure I'm fine, it's been 5 to 6 years since this happened. The desk in now in my room and safely covered in junk, and we now have two phones, so I don't have to weave between furniture to answer.

Most injuries during remote juggling are to the remotes, now that I think about it. I'm surprised they still work.

 

[Not-here-anymore]

I was changing a lightbulb. I decided that it would be a good idea to have some light at the same time to see what I was doing. Work out the ending.

Oh, and I managed to stab myself whilst ironing clothes. With the iron which, it seems, is just about hot enough to cauterise the resulting wound. No blood, just a nasty looking burn/stab scar

 

[AngloDoom]

I grabbed a pizza-tray that was on top of a hob, while the hob was on, with bare hands. I also ate a burning crisp.

 

[Deadlock Radium]

I dropped my 360 on my big toe yesterday. It still works but my toe is purple

Just be glad it wasn't an Original Xbox, then you'd have to amputate..

When out luging (I think that's the English word for it) I decided to be badass and go into supersonic speed on one of these, I hit a taxi in about 25mph. Hurt like hell for about 3 weeks straight.

Spoiler: I crashed while riding one of these.

It still hurts like hell, and it was in November 2008.

 

[Blazing Steel]

I was at a polish hotel and I wanted to charge my ipod. So I stuck my British to european converter in. Then my American to British converter then the ipot charger into the convert. Just then there was a power surge. Needless to say myself and my ipod were a little worse for wear.

 

[GundamSentinel]

A lighter, fishing wire and my finger met. The scars are still there.

 

[JLML]

Where to begin?

I broke my arm when falling with my bike (because I held it in a pretty weird way.. let's just say I landed on it and both bones in it were broken), broke a toe by tripping over the threshold to my room, injured my knee when skiing a few years ago (don't know what kind of injury, but I couldn't bend it at all the day after.. thankfully my uncle, who is a doctor, was there and thanks to him it was all right in 2 days), injured the other knee a few months ago when running on ice, hit my elbow pretty hard last summer, I've gotten a whole bunch of cuts and other minor injuries from playing with glass and other sharp objects...

that's some of it.

 

[The_ModeRazor]

Accidentally stuck a thumb in my right eye (few years ago)
Almost got blind to that eye, so it probably wasn't very smart.

 

[K84]

Tried to step into a pool, which was deeper than i thought.
Stepped in, hit the side with my nuts, and stayed underwater for necessary profanity.
Underwater cursing is awesome.

 

[BlueAnubis]

Well, at the age of three I ate several Deadly Nightshade berries (one of the most poisonous natural substances in the northern hemisphere) and had to get my stomach pumped.

Then I did it again... at the same bush... three weeks later.

 

[Plurralbles]

broken ankle by sledding in May.

 

[Monkfish Acc.]

Oh, you know, the usual. Walking into shit, instinctually grabbing things that turn out to be hot, that kind of thing.

Think about the worst one was managing to nail myself in the nuts with the arm of an armchair.
I was standing out of it and turning around at the same time, and I guess I applied forward momentum too soon, or something.
My sister, her friends, and even my mum all burst out laughing, and did not stop for like ten straight minutes
I can see the funny side now, of course, but at the time, I was pretty darn indignant.