Escapists and marriage

[Blitzwarp]

-Are you married? And if not, do you intend on getting married someday?
Personally, I don't believe in marriage. That is to say, I think it should be a right for all, but it's just not suited to me personally. I'm not good with relationships. :x

-Will it be/was it a quiet ceremony or a big lavish event?
If a guy/girl ever did manage to get a ring on my finger, it would be a tiny event over in a matter of minutes. I don't understand couples who spend hundreds of thousands on the wedding and then can't afford a house or to plan for the future. :/ I also despise 'Bridezillas'. OH MY GOD THE FLOWERS AREN'T PERFECT CLEARLY I'M MARRYING THE WRONG MAN. Umkay good luck with that!

-How about divorce? Do you think people think too lightly about the commitment of marriage or should people be allowed to terminate a marriage for any reason they see fit?
I think the rising divorce rate shows that the majority of the human race aren't good at sustained relationships. A lot of people claim that 'oh my god people just don't try any more' whilst forgetting that divorce has only really been available to the mainstream public for the past forty years (speaking of the UK here). How many Victorians would have gotten divorced in a flash if they'd had the chance?

That being said, I do think the perception of relationships has gotten a bit distorted nowadays. Soap operas and things of that kind basically say that the first time you hit a problem it's obvious the relationship isn't going to work so why try?, when the attitude should really be 'okay we have hit a speed bump, are we going to glide smoothly over it or go careening off towards disaster?'

Also the level of misogyny I've experienced all over these forums is enough to convince me that the majority of men only view women as dumb or malicious sexbots (no, I know that's not really the case but guys seriously, we are people too you know).

-Same sex marriage. Should it be possible or not?
Yes. If one person loves another person, and its within the confines of the law and reciprocated, why the heck should they not be allowed to marry? Oh right, because a 2,000 year old book says so. Sorry, my bad.

-Anything else you might want to add.
I'm sorry if I come off as a bit high-handed or whatever here. I'm knackered and not thinking straight. XD

 

[octafish]

Yes, seven years so far.
We had about 80 guests but didn't have a formal sit down meal, that worked well without being too unwieldy. I've been to bigger and I've been to smaller.
Sure better than a bitter poisonous marriage if it comes to that.
In a secular way yes same sex marriage should be allowed. Religiously, well there aren't many organised religions that allow it so take it up with the deity of your choice. I really don't understand Gay Catholics who want the Church to change. The Church hates you, why stay?
I used to think getting married was the best thing we could have done, until we had kids.

 

[Marik2]

Honestly, I don't believe in marriage.
I believe in love, commmitement and just being happy with one person and all, but not marriage.
It's a fake symbol of love and serves no purpose than to just show to the world you like someone and for financial security.

*sigh*

Im tired of people having this mentality of marriage...

Love, commitment, and being with that special person IS marriage.

I blame the way that people of this generation have cheapen it with their ego, with as you said "just show to the world you like someone and for financial security."

 

[The Unworthy Gentleman]

-No, I'm not married. I don't intend to get married, however that doesn't mean I won't.
-It'll be whatever my bride desires. I would go for a ceremony with a lot of nerdy references.
-People grow apart, no matter how close they used to be. If they think it's the right thing to do then they should. I think divorce is made out to be the big solution. Couples should at least try to fix problems before getting a divorce.
-Yes, same sex marriage is something that should be allowed everywhere.

 

[Thespian]

-Are you married? And if not, do you intend on getting married someday?
-Will it be/was it a quiet ceremony or a big lavish event?
-How about divorce? Do you think people think too lightly about the commitment of marriage or should people be allowed to terminate a marriage for any reason they see fit?
-Same sex marriage. Should it be possible or not?

-Nope, and definitely.
-Probably in between the two. I don't like too many people being around, but DAMNIT I want luxury.
-I think people should sometimes give more thought to marriage and not just bail out when it stops being magical happy pony land, but of course individual personal situations are things I won't always be able to factor in, so ultimately the choice should be available.
-It damn well better be or my marriage will have a very brief and nonexistent ceremony.

 

[Mr Montmorency]

-Are you married? And if not, do you intend on getting married someday?
No. I never will get married, and I'm amazed people still intend to do it.

-Will it be/was it a quiet ceremony or a big lavish event?
Why waste your money on a piece of paper?

-How about divorce? Do you think people think too lightly about the commitment of marriage or should people be allowed to terminate a marriage for any reason they see fit?
Divorce is inevitable. All marriage will do is take half of the stuff you own and give it to the person who divorced you. If you're a man, and you had a child with your wife, she'll take the child, and you'll be forced to support them even though they don't live with you. The woman always takes the kid. In a similar light, if there's an argument, the man is the one that's kicked out of the house. If that isn't sexism, I don't know what is.

-Same sex marriage. Should it be possible or not?
Sure, it should be possible, but it's not all that much different to the joke that marriage in general is. I don't understand why they want to bother with the issue, all it does is give politicians a flimsy excuse for a debate argument to spin for their own purposes.

 

[Sonic Doctor]

I'm a little unsure about the concept of marriage. Divorce, especially in North America, seem to be becoming more and more common, leading one to wonder if perhaps it simply isn't compatible with our culture. If two people really wants to get married, so be it, but there shouldn't be any pressure to do so.

That is the problem, some people don't understand the concept of marriage. They don't understand it is a partnership not a one way street.

It isn't that it isn't compatible with our culture. It is that people these days rather just runaway from a problem than just deal with it.

"He/she doesn't spend enough time with me." -- Deal with it. This is one of the most stupid reasons. 95% of the time the one complaining about it is overreacting.

"He/she doesn't want to have sex with me when I want it." -- Deal with it.

"He/she doesn't let me handle any of the money." -- Deal with it.

etc. etc. -- Deal with it.

I think counseling secessions should be mandatory. If the spouse isn't beating the other one up or they aren't mentally scarring each other, than they really don't have a reason for divorce...yet.

 

[jack583]

no. kinda hoping i will be someday, but not in a rush.
as fr as i'm concerned you are married once you get engaged. so i'd prefer going to courthouse to make it legal.
the vowes say "TILL DEATH", so unless one of you dies or cheats on the other ("dead to me"), i'd say no to divorce.
(i'm going to get trolled for this) don't aggree with same sex relationships, but my reasons only affect myself and no one else, so i won't say anything to protest it. as for marriage, anything i say would also apply to heterosexual couples.

 

[aseelt]

- Yes I'm married.

- It was a quiet judge's ceremony, but we'll be doing several events in different countries to celebrate it (when we have the funds to do so)

- I think people should be able to divorce (after all, why be in a relationship that isn't working). It seems like society treats marriage as something fickle nowadays.

- Sure why not, gay couples aren't harming anyone by marrying each other.

- I didn't go out seeking marriage (in fact I never thought I would be getting married at my age), in some ways it snuck up on me. However I don't regret the speed in which I did get married for an instant and I regard it as the best decision I've ever made.

 

[ShadowsofHope]

-Are you married? And if not, do you intend on getting married someday?
-Will it be/was it a quiet ceremony or a big lavish event?
-How about divorce? Do you think people think too lightly about the commitment of marriage or should people be allowed to terminate a marriage for any reason they see fit?
-Same sex marriage. Should it be possible or not?
-Anything else you might want to add.

- No. And, I don't know. It'll mostly be for secular benefits to ensure security for myself and my significant other (when I find them, that is), as well as a sign of commitment.
- Likely a quiet ceremony with about a dozen guests. I hate large crowds.
- By the looks of the current divorce rate in the Western World, most people take it too lightly. To my point of view, only abuse, blackmail, neglect, or unfaithfulness should be amply enough for a divorce if the couple cannot work it out.
- Yes, it should. Though to say, Canada already has legalized Gay Marriage.

 

[CactiComplex]

-Are you married? And if not, do you intend on getting married someday?

Single at the moment, but if I met the right person then yeah, I would.

-Will it be/was it a quiet ceremony or a big lavish event?

I'm tempted to say quiet, but who knows.

-How about divorce? Do you think people think too lightly about the commitment of marriage or should people be allowed to terminate a marriage for any reason they see fit?

If the relationship's gone bad and divorce is the only way out then yeah. I do, however, believe every effort should be made to reconcile because it can affect people other than the couple, especially if they have kids.

-Same sex marriage. Should it be possible or not?

Yeah, otherwise I'm out of luck. In all seriousness though, yes, I do think it should be. I know the religious argument is brought into it a lot, but if you can have a non-religious wedding between a man and a woman and still call it marriage then why not between two of the same gender?

 

[Brutal Peanut]

- Yes, I am married!

- We had a quiet, inexpensive ceremony in our own backyard, with I think, 13 guests in total. We had a Christian ceremony because he is a Christian.

- Yes, I do. I know people who've gotten married after only a few months of knowing each other, and then wonder why they say things like, "I don't really know who I married! It's like she/he isn't the same person as they were during the sixth month we were dating. Derp!" The reason it seems now, is selfishness (excluding the good reasons to get one).

A marriage is a co-op game that you can't win with just one person. There are some sacrifices, mostly compromises in strategy, and you need to realize that your co-op partner is still another player with their own set of skills and character sheet ; just as they were when they joined your game in the first place.

I already was moved in with my husband, already acting married for 2 1/2 - 3 years before we even began talking about marriage.I mean real talking. Pros, cons, and what it could do to our relationship. We went over everything again. Religious views, thoughts on kids, careers, future plans, etc. Not staring up at the stars day-dreaming about castles and ponies (okay maybe a little. Who doesn't like ponies?!). And it took us another year before we actually got married.

- Of course same sex marriage should be allowed. Why not?

- Marriage isn't always as bad as everyone makes it out to be (though I know a few that did not end well AT ALL and the women did make the mans life hell, and vice-versa). Our relationship didn't change, because we didn't make a big deal out of it. Just , don't sweat the small stuff. If your gf/bf is brow-beating you, and you aren't ready, don't fold under the pressure just to appease them. Just make sure it's something that you really want. If it isn't...then don't.

TL;DR , amirite? XD

 

[TehCookie]

-Are you married? And if not, do you intend on getting married someday?
I'm not married, but I do wish to find they guy I would want to spend my life with and marry him.
-Will it be/was it a quiet ceremony or a big lavish event?
I plan on having a small event, but have it be extremely noisy and lively. I wouldn't take it seriously, my job to make sure everyone who drinks is plastered and record the whole thing so I can try to remember the next day. It's suppose to be a happy event, why make it boring for people to come?
-How about divorce? Do you think people think too lightly about the commitment of marriage or should people be allowed to terminate a marriage for any reason they see fit?
I think people should think a lot more about marriage before jumping into it. With all the divorces it kind of ruins the entire meaning. I don't want to force two people who hate each other to stay together but I just feel people should stop thinking "well if it doesn't work out we can get a divorce" and take the commitment more seriously. However it should still be there for people who have actual problems like a husband who turned abusive.
-Same sex marriage. Should it be possible or not?
I'd avoid angering the obnoxious christans and say civil unions or whatever term they want to use for the exact same thing.
-Anything else you might want to add.
No not really...

 

[MrAkuma201]

-Are you married? And if not, do you intend on getting married someday?
-Will it be/was it a quiet ceremony or a big lavish event?
-How about divorce? Do you think people think too lightly about the commitment of marriage or should people be allowed to terminate a marriage for any reason they see fit?
-Same sex marriage. Should it be possible or not?
-Anything else you might want to add.

My answers:
1)No one I'd like too when in my late 20s early 30s.
2)It will be a small one don't like my family and I will only invite close friends.
3)People take divorce too lightly sort out your prob like an adult.
4)I think same sex marriage is ok I don't see the prob.
5)Yes don't get into marriage because the sex is great or he or she is hot you need to know if you love them first then think about marriage.

 

[Verlander]

-Are you married? And if not, do you intend on getting married someday?

No, and no. I don't see the point. However, I'm only mid-20's, so maybe I'll change my opinions

-Will it be/was it a quiet ceremony or a big lavish event?

It would ahve to be big, because what's the point otherwise? I also have a LOT of friends and family

-How about divorce? Do you think people think too lightly about the commitment of marriage or should people be allowed to terminate a marriage for any reason they see fit?

I think people get married because it's what they are supposed to do, or they have a rose tinted view of what married life is like. Some people get married before sex and living together, which is the stupidest thing ever. If I was gonna get married, it would have to be with someone who understood me, and could accept me for who I am, and frankly, I'm already with that person, and there's no point. The only attraction of marriage for me is the legal benefits

-Same sex marriage. Should it be possible or not?

Sure, let everyone make mistakes equally. I see absolutely no decent argument against it

-Anything else you might want to add.

Don't do it kids, it's a waste of time and money. Be happy as you are

 

[Gigano]

...

*sigh*

Im tired of people having this mentality of marriage...

Love, commitment, and being with that special person IS marriage.

I blame the way that people of this generation have cheapen it with their ego, with as you said "just show to the world you like someone and for financial security."

And just how is marriage more "Love, commitment, and being with special person" than living together with that special person as a loving unmarried couple in a mutually financed house with shared parenthood over a few children?

Unless it actually offers something to top that scenario, something that specifically adds to their love, then it's an unnecessary bother for those who aren't religious and don't want the set of legal boons and obligations it entail.

Religious and legal obligations aren't really necessary for love, nor do they necessarily add anything to it. Fine if they do for you, but your "mentality" is hardly superior or normative for how others should live out their love lives.