Ever Been [b]IN[/b] Love?

[grimsprice]

I have been in love for 4 or 5 years now. Its still strong. Although it only flairs when i talk to her on the phone. Unfortunately she's about 240 miles away, and on the other side of a mountain. So we haven't seen each other in at least 2 years.

Its sad panda, but i doubt we'll ever let it go.

I'm in an oddly similar kind of situation. Amazing, isn't it, how those feelings can stay solid even when you never see them in person?

It is pretty crazy. I'm lucky she's going to be moving over here soonish.

 

[Snork Maiden]

<22, can't be in love due to people still finding out who they are. Just more fondness and insecurities mixed into one at a younger age.

Or not. Maybe when I was 17 it was all about the sex, but now we're still together, still happy, and are living together. It's something much deeper than simple infatuation or lust.

 

[Carboncrown]

I'm 15 and good at killing my emotions, sure I've had a crush or two but I react to those pretty self aware[sub]exept when i was 7[/sub], as in "Oh for fucks sake, dont be a stereotypical teen! [sub]You pussy.[/sub]" And suprise, suprise they didn't last very long.

 

[Zacharine]

I was in love with a nice, beautiful girl. We were together for over 3 years. I decided to pop the question, having already bought the engagement ring, figured how to do, you know the works.

Just as I was about to do it, she gives the dreaded 'just friends' speech and dumped me on the spot.

I was pretty heartbroken. I figured what the hell, what had changed.

A week later, while I was still recovering, I saw her together with my best friend. Going out, holding hands, kissing.

So, I decided that was it. I returned the engagement ring to the shop, took a copy of both the receipt I had gotten when I bought the ring and when I returned it and mailed to copies to my now-ex-girlfriend. I had underlined the dates and the words 'engagement ring x1'.

I didn't answer her calls. She stopped trying three weeks later. I figured, if she was willing to throw away three years together in an increasingly serious relationship for a try at my best friend, then she wasn't the girl I wanted to marry. And attempting to fix whatever pieces were left felt futile and too much hard work for too little gain. After all, I would never be able to forget that feeling of betrayal, so indeed friends was the absolute best we could have hoped for.

You win, good sir. Both this thread and payback terms. But you should have answered once or something later, the reaction is the best part.

Nah, I didn't enjoy hurting her like that. I just wanted to make my feelings towards her perfectly clear, as well as what she had given away. To do anything more would have been unnecessary and uncomfortable for both us. The point went across pretty well methinks, and that was all I wanted to accomplish. Being an extra bastard about it would have served no-one.

 

[Triangulon]

I was in love with a nice, beautiful girl. We were together for over 3 years. I decided to pop the question, having already bought the engagement ring, figured how to do, you know the works.

Just as I was about to do it, she gives the dreaded 'just friends' speech and dumped me on the spot.

I was pretty heartbroken. I figured what the hell, what had changed.

A week later, while I was still recovering, I saw her together with my best friend. Going out, holding hands, kissing.

So, I decided that was it. I returned the engagement ring to the shop, took a copy of both the receipt I had gotten when I bought the ring and when I returned it and mailed to copies to my now-ex-girlfriend. I had underlined the dates and the words 'engagement ring x1'.

I didn't answer her calls. She stopped trying three weeks later. I figured, if she was willing to throw away three years together in an increasingly serious relationship for a try at my best friend, then she wasn't the girl I wanted to marry. And attempting to fix whatever pieces were left felt futile and too much hard work for too little gain. After all, I would never be able to forget that feeling of betrayal, so indeed friends was the absolute best we could have hoped for.

EDIT: Took me about a month after that until I was feeling okay. Then I realized that I had nothing to be really sorry about. Heartbreak is part of life, I was almost 23, single, had my own (albeit small) rental flat, my good health and my mates. Took me about two hours to organize the loudest party the neighborhood had seen in two years. And considering it was an apartment for university students only, thats saying something. Partying is one thing we do well and with gusto, when we rarely have the chance for it.

For the OP: get over her. It's way past time for that. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, go out and do something you have never done before (for example, bungee jumping, sea cruise), enjoy the experience and once done, shout out 'Life is Good!' from the bottom of your lungs. Then force a smile for the rest of the day if it doesn't come naturally. I swear, by the next morning you'll be feeling a whole lot better.

You sir are a scholar and a gentleman. Just what I needed to hear after reading this thread. I feel for you but you seem to have come out of it ok. Good on you. And several points of win.

 

[amrl]

Hm. I don't like how a lot of people are responding saying they were in love, but are not now. Am I the only one who believes you can only be in love once? I believe you can love more than once. Being in love is different to loving something.
Does anyone else agree? Or am I just being all gushy?

 

[Snork Maiden]

Gushy

My mum loved my dad, and now she loves my step-dad.

 

[SmartIdiot]

Yes. Got over it. I suggest you do too.

 

[DemonicVixen]

Im in love at this very moment. Known him for almost 3months (planning celebrations next week lol). He is the best thing that has ever happened to me and i love him for changing my life so dramatically into a world i never thought id see. For the first time in years i have a reason to live another day. A reason to go to college. All for him!

(He is currently watching Escapist videos beside me as we are in college lol. He hates me staring at him coz it makes him self-concious, little does he realise i only do it coz he cute and has gorgeous chocolate coloured eyes)

 

[Kuchinawa212]

Nope! And at this rate I don't plan to be in a some time

 

[Snork Maiden]

<22, can't be in love due to people still finding out who they are. Just more fondness and insecurities mixed into one at a younger age.

Or not. Maybe when I was 17 it was all about the sex, but now we're still together, still happy, and are living together. It's something much deeper than simple infatuation or lust.

I won't argue it, but complacency is also a mean reason.

You're suggesting we're only together because it's easier that way? Because it would've been far easier (bearing in mind we've both left and gone to Uni) to just let the relationship fall apart.

I'm curious (given that you aren't arguing whether or not love exists) as to what you'd say if we were still together in 5 years (and so passed your magical 22 years mark). What would it be then?

 

[ShadowsofHope]

Currently, but its an internet across-the-ocean deal. Not too bright for much more, unfortunately.

I've had plently of crushes, but I know rejection well enough.

I'm also 17, and a jaded cynic, and a non-believer, which may factor in a little.

 

[stone0042]

I am right now, to my girlfriend of over a year and a half

 

[TheReactorSings]

In the words of Gore Vidal:

"I do not believe in ghosts, astrology, palmistry, graphology, John Cage, love or God. I do believe in the moment, in the pleasures of the flesh, of conversation, of art--at least for the few so minded."

Not that I necessarily subscribe to all of that; they're just good words.

 

[Agent Larkin]

I still am. She thinks of me as a friend and is going out with another guy who is a friend of mine. But im happy so long as shes happy.

 

[mobsterlobster]

Nope. Never. And probably never will be. I don't believe in "true love" and stuff like that. But who knows, maybe the right girl will come along and wash away my cynicism. But then again, maybe I'll be eaten alive by a great white shark. Anything's possible.

 

[FallenRainbows]

Love is impossible to define. but I miss no opportunity to see what you guys think of my writing so...

Spoiler: Long metaphor on love

Once upon a time... maybe even far away. There was such a thing called romance. It?s all but dead and gone now. Few are left to live by it, fewer yet to it; again fewer to understand it, such people are called romantics. Their magic? Naught but love. I know you?re nodding to yourself right now thinking of how you understand it. May well you do; yet more likely you don?t. You see love is the only word that doesn?t mean itself, not the words fault of course; such emotion cannot even be imagined with empty word and definitions. While love is in fact, a fact, its definition is more fluid. To describe the relation of people and their understanding in love; let us have a metaphor. Let?s think of the sea, that sea now represents love. However this is no ordinary sea there is no land after it, just deeper and deeper and deeper. On the shore we have the people who call love a myth and a false ideal. Despite the fact it is right in front of them they choose to ignore it for whatever reason. I have no place to say they are wrong; or to mock them. So do so yourself. On the beaches we have the people who are destroying love by disgracing it by sleeping around and having no commitment; they stand close enough to be associated by the ignorant; but they are simply the ground up rocks on the seabed spit out by a disappointed sea. Then we have those who wade into the sea; often the teenagers who proclaim they know love, maybe that?s you? Who have gotten their feet wet but don?t know how deep it goes; or how dangerous it gets. We have the explorers on the surface of the deep waters looking for what is right below them; they strive to understand love or to find it, and by doing so overlook it. And in the deepest parts we have the romantics, the fish of the sea. With the beauty and the danger and how worthy it is of stepping into the danger. Then finally we have the romantics who for whatever folly or misunderstanding fell in love with one from the shallows and has since been left to cry their own sea of tears, the poor souls that undergo this fate, they stand at the edge of the word, forever deciding what to do next: Chase the girl and urge her to the depths with you? Wait for her to come to you? Join the explorers above? Wait until love finds you again? Or to jump, jump into complete oblivion, of the face of the word. I call these people the dreamers. This is the story of one such dreamer. My name? Long since faded into obscurity in fact I may be more than one person, I may even be you, for the sake of telling a tale let?s call this young man: Zack... Zack Erdington.

Why yes that is directly ripped from a story I'm writing. Is easier that way. And yes I have been in love. Is painful. But worth it in the end, no I haven't reached the end yet.