"Now things perceive to their logical conclusion with a game that has you meddle with the very origin of life of the universe including a depiction of evolution that would make a furious Charlees Darwin eat his own beard."
"Which was your favourite Quake level, the brown castle, the greenish-brown temple or the other brown castle. Jericho shows us exactly how far we've come with the levels being, in order, brown ruins, more brown ruins, brown castle, more brown castle and revenge of the brown castle."
(on the subject of QTEs)
"But even if they were bright pink and 6-feet wide it wouldn't remove the fact that the sequences are unnecessary, obnoxious, clichéd and some other mean words."
"There's so much black leather on display it's like someone took the goth (unknown word) from a small-town high school, pinned them down in front of a 24-hour Rammbo marathon, then smacked them brutally around the head with a baseball bat made out of frozen stupid."
(on the subject of the Resi 5 inventory system)
"And when both inventorie are full, the fun begins! Say my partner has an egg that I want to use. Can't just hand it to me or even just pop it straight into my mouth like a flirty dinner date. I have to exchange it for something of mine, use the egg, then request my other item back, assuming she hasn't eaten it. It's like one of those fucking 'fox, chick and worm' puzzles"