Fortune cookie time!

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Chiasm

New member
Aug 27, 2008
462
0
0
The oddest one I have ever got was,

"You are cute"

I swear that cookie was trying to hit on me.
 

ElephantGuts

New member
Jul 9, 2008
3,520
0
0
Don't look behind you.
or
You just ate dog meat.
or
Sometimes suicide is the answer.
or
The building is about to explode. Jump out of the window to your left.
 

Monkfish Acc.

New member
May 7, 2008
4,102
0
0
"Don't look now, but that guy over there is totally checking you out"

"That is an excellent idea. Do it"
 

Debatra

Kaedanis Pyran
Sep 6, 2008
661
0
0
"Go outside through the North exit. There will be a red sedan with the back driver-side door slightly ajar. Enter the car three spaces West. There will be a cell phone and a note on the dashboard. Dial the number on the note, then destroy the note. DIAL ONLY ON THE PROVIDED PHONE! KEEP YOURS OFF! Make the call and await further instructions."
 

Mr_Powers

New member
Jul 11, 2008
141
0
0
Ha ha, you thought that was chicken didn't you?

You will die if you finish this sentence.

Try not to think about Polar Bears.

I lost the Game.

Confucious would say: Why are you asking advice of a China man who has been dead for over 2000 year, I am dead, what the hell do you expect me to say?

Error 30349: beginning dump of physical memory

Fortune cookies are people too!

Oops

You will die on Feb 5, 2009 at 7:23 PM EST, prepare your self.

This is the last will and testament of Wuan Lee, a friend, family man, and fortune cookie.

-I have to stop here, I am having too much fun with this.

EDIT: May the Pants be with you.-- Just had to throw that in.
 

Beffudled Sheep

New member
Jan 23, 2009
2,029
0
0
Country
Texas
Your wife will cheat on you with chinese waiter very soon.
Man: honey? You have to read thi...s. Oh My God! Pumpkin no!
 

sidhe3141

New member
Jun 12, 2008
223
0
0
That character you had tattooed on your arm? It means "idiot".
Do you always twitch your face like that?
Your life will be as Hobbes described: nasty, brutish, and short
mokes310 said:
"Don't ask for a fortune cookie in a Japanese Restaurant...in bed"
It was actually "Beware of Japanese waiters bearing fortune cookies".
 

USSR

Probably your average communist.
Oct 4, 2008
2,367
0
0
"Ah god, did you have to break my spine just to read my insides you heartless bastard T.T"