From any form of fiction, Pick a wife for Kratos

[HollywoodH17]

Spoiler

Mass Effect 2: Jack.

Not sure if that's a spoiler. Someone has to put her in her place, and same for him. I think they would cancel each other out wonderfully.

 

[Tristan Sjet]

Definitely Yeesha.

She's the Grower, she can teleport, she can kill her own food, and she's got some sweet tattoos.

Hahaha, she's taken loser.

OP: Westly crusher.

 

[JEBWrench]

Hahaha, she's taken loser.

Her spouse died! She's a widow!

Besides, she can teleport. She could handle two partners at once.

 

[Darkenwrath]

Navi. Just because they deserve each other. HEYLISTENHEYLISTENHEYLISTENHEYLISTENHEYLISTEN

 

[Orange Monkey]

Princess Peach, let's see Mario save her now.

I wonder if marios jump can kill anything?, Well i guess Kratos just has to wear a helmet and marios fucked XD

But can't Mario just pick up Kratos by the leg and whirl him round and round and round until he throws him onto some nice, spiky piece of scenery at that point?

OT: Lara croft from the toomb raider franchise might be good as she also seems to have an absurdly large chest and a penchant for murdering people and giant monsters. She could even

provide the monetary income by stealing valuable archaeological artifacts and selling them.

That is an excellent point, but seeing as Mario would have to do that 3 times to kill him, I think Kratos would of picked up on his attack pattern by then.

 

[Flack]

Princess Peach, let's see Mario save her now.

DAMNIT! thats what I was going to say

 

[Dexiro]

How about Sagat from SF

 

[Tiny116]

Magiere From the noble dead saga, See her go all Dhampir on his ass XD

 

[Spitfire175]

I...I just can't.

I mean, every time I imagine anything remotely humanoid standing next to Kratos, I see him breaking it's spine. I don't even understand how he procreated without tearing the woman in half.

Yeah I'm having that same problem.
I can't even picture him beside a friend, let alone a wife.
DAMNIT KRATOS STOP DECAPITATING THE PEOPLE I TRY TO HOOK YOU UP WITH!!

Indeed. I think it's good for everyone's spine and internal organs that Kratos is sort of "off the market".

 

[Jonatron]

I...I just can't.

I mean, every time I imagine anything remotely humanoid standing next to Kratos, I see him breaking it's spine. I don't even understand how he procreated without tearing the woman in half.

I was under the impression he did, from hearsay. (Haven't played the games...)

 

[fanklok]

Sheva from RE5 they're both plauged with quick time events so it'd be impossible for either one to die.

Spoiler: Just look at the last panel

Could you imagine that wedding, I sure could.

PRESS X TO GIVE YOUR OWN WRITTEN VOWS.

 

[CheckD3]

The entire cast of Dead or Alive Beach Volley ball

It's Kratos here, since I'm sure he can have as many wives as he wants in Greek times, the girls are also probably horny enough to deal with Kratos when he wants them

 

[Blow_Pop]

Lady Death.....

 

[StarofAzura]

Spoiler

Mass Effect 2: Jack.

Not sure if that's a spoiler. Someone has to put her in her place, and same for him. I think they would cancel each other out wonderfully.

-dies of lols and general approval-

 

[teutonicman]

Michael Atkinson.

He said 'wife' not '*****'.

Hmmm, maybe Lilith from Borderlands. She enjoys slaughtering hordes of men and creatures almost as much as Kratos does. She even laughs sadistically when she explodes people.

What are you talking about "***** not wife". Atkinson would totally be the pitcher in that relationship.

 

[antidonkey]

HHmm......a few choices come to mind right away.

Ripley. The weakest of the choices but not afraid to whoops some ass if need be...especially when aided by a powerlifting exoskeleton.

Sarah Connor. Might just be a bit too insane....even for Kratos.

The Bride. Equally skilled at removing various body parts and would look awesome topless with giant red tattoos.

 

[Kouen]

Blood Rayne or any of the Nazi chicks in Return to Castle Wolfenstien