Greatest Quotes Ever
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If you're in a war, instead of throwing a hand grenade at some guys, throw one of those little baby-type pumpkins. Maybe it'll make everyone think of how crazy war is, and while they're thinking, you can throw a real grenade at them. -Jack Handey
It is fun to be in the same decade with you.
-Franklin D. Roosevelt to Sir Winston Churchill during World War II
It is fatal to enter any war without the will to win it. -General Douglas MacArthur
Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake. -Napoleon Bonaparte
Patriots always talk of dying for their country, and never of killing for their country.
-Bertrand Russell
the last one is my favorite.
It is fun to be in the same decade with you.
-Franklin D. Roosevelt to Sir Winston Churchill during World War II
It is fatal to enter any war without the will to win it. -General Douglas MacArthur
Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake. -Napoleon Bonaparte
Patriots always talk of dying for their country, and never of killing for their country.
-Bertrand Russell
the last one is my favorite.
Great one, and lots of other funny ones on how ineffective pistols and stuff are. Also:gameking218 said:
"All right, they're on our left, they're on our right, and they're in front of us, they're behind us...they can't get away this time."
-General "Chesty" Puller, USMC, while surrounded by 8 enemy divisions during the Korean War.
?A great war leaves the country with three armies: An army of cripples, an army of mourners, and an army of thieves.?
-Anonymous
"If you could classify a dog and a dentist in happiness, how would you rate them? Now some might say a dentist could be happy too if he could lick himself, but I won't have that; this is a serious discussion. Besides, that's what assistants are for."
-Scott Adams, on suicide
"Stop tea-bagging, you d-bag, or the f_cking snipers'll pin our asses!"
Me, to a friend, on a paintball course
"The British military force is the strongest in the world. We've conquered all of Europe. Our soldiers have seen battle hundreds of times, and are the most experienced army of all time. The last thing we want to do is fight."
-British General, during the Revolutionary War, on the psychological aspects of war
I haven't read this thread enough to know if these have been used yet, but anyway:
"People are strange. We're all morticians. Hey, what's on TV?"
-Ric Ocasek
"When fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross."
-Sinclair Lewis
"Something, something, something, Dark Side. Something, something, something, complete."
-Family Guy (the formula for the Emperor's dialog from Star Wars)
"If you use a feather during sex, that's kinky. If you use the whole chicken, that's just sick."
-One of the profs here
"Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live."
-Oscar Wilde.
"People are strange. We're all morticians. Hey, what's on TV?"
-Ric Ocasek
"When fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross."
-Sinclair Lewis
"Something, something, something, Dark Side. Something, something, something, complete."
-Family Guy (the formula for the Emperor's dialog from Star Wars)
"If you use a feather during sex, that's kinky. If you use the whole chicken, that's just sick."
-One of the profs here
"Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live."
-Oscar Wilde.
Maybe I don't remember Euro that well, but I don't think Britain ever conquered all of Europe.Zombie_King said:
Here come quotes from my favorite book/movie
"How long could we maintain? I wondered. How long until one of us starts raving and jabbering at this boy? What will he think then? This same lonely desert was the last known home of the Manson family; will he make that grim connection when my attorney starts screaming about bats and huge manta rays coming down on the car? If so, well, we'll just have to cut his head off and bury him somewhere, 'cause it goes without saying that we can't turn him loose. He'd report us at once to some kind of outback Nazi law enforcement agency and they'll run us down like dogs. Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"
"You're fired... Awful jackass"
"There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die."
"Ah, devil ether. It makes you behave like the village drunkard in some early Irish novel. Total loss of all basic motor function. Blurred vision, no balance, numb tongue. The mind recoils in horror, unable to communicate with the spinal column. Which is interesting because you can actually watch yourself behaving in this terrible way, but you can't control it."
"With a bit of luck, his life was ruined forever. Always thinking that just behind some narrow door in all of his favorite bars, men in red woolen shirts are getting incredible kicks from things he'll never know."
-Raoul Duke, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
I could go on, but my favorite one happens to be a bit racist out of context
"How long could we maintain? I wondered. How long until one of us starts raving and jabbering at this boy? What will he think then? This same lonely desert was the last known home of the Manson family; will he make that grim connection when my attorney starts screaming about bats and huge manta rays coming down on the car? If so, well, we'll just have to cut his head off and bury him somewhere, 'cause it goes without saying that we can't turn him loose. He'd report us at once to some kind of outback Nazi law enforcement agency and they'll run us down like dogs. Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"
"You're fired... Awful jackass"
"There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die."
"Ah, devil ether. It makes you behave like the village drunkard in some early Irish novel. Total loss of all basic motor function. Blurred vision, no balance, numb tongue. The mind recoils in horror, unable to communicate with the spinal column. Which is interesting because you can actually watch yourself behaving in this terrible way, but you can't control it."
"With a bit of luck, his life was ruined forever. Always thinking that just behind some narrow door in all of his favorite bars, men in red woolen shirts are getting incredible kicks from things he'll never know."
-Raoul Duke, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
I could go on, but my favorite one happens to be a bit racist out of context
(Me and my brother)
I: What percent water is that water you're drinking?
He: 100% I hope.
I: What percent water are you?
He: 90%
I: You are currently consuming something which 90% of your body is composed of. Explain to me why this is not cannabalism.
He: Well, I'm 10% carbon and ... smarter than water!
(The Principia Discordia)
Convictions make convicts.
It is my firm belief that it is a mistake to hold firm beliefs.
King Kong Died For Your Sins.
I: What percent water is that water you're drinking?
He: 100% I hope.
I: What percent water are you?
He: 90%
I: You are currently consuming something which 90% of your body is composed of. Explain to me why this is not cannabalism.
He: Well, I'm 10% carbon and ... smarter than water!
(The Principia Discordia)
Convictions make convicts.
It is my firm belief that it is a mistake to hold firm beliefs.
King Kong Died For Your Sins.
werepossum said:shut up.Lukeje said:
"We shall go on to the end, we shall fight in France,
we shall fight on the seas and oceans,
we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our Island, whatever the cost may be,
we shall fight on the beaches,
we shall fight on the landing grounds,
we shall fight in the fields and in the streets,
we shall fight in the hills;
we shall never surrender"
winston churchill - rule brittania!
Gawd. I'll go look where I left that dvd in my room somewhere so I can watch it again :< (it's Airplane!, btw)agerdemon said:
shakeslol said:Hey, you guys kicked him out as soon as the war was over. It would have been only fair had he come to America to become our leader. Nothing in particular against Eisenhower. And Churchill couldn't have been president, not legally. But he would have been a good one. In fact, we could use some of that leadership now.werepossum said:shut up.Lukeje said:
"We shall go on to the end, we shall fight in France,
we shall fight on the seas and oceans,
we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our Island, whatever the cost may be,
we shall fight on the beaches,
we shall fight on the landing grounds,
we shall fight in the fields and in the streets,
we shall fight in the hills;
we shall never surrender"
winston churchill - rule brittania!
I hope i didn't skip over this, there are MANY posts:
"Hairy balls of the Gods!" - Korgoth of Barbaria
"Hairy balls of the Gods!" - Korgoth of Barbaria
Um... the body is only about 70% water, and the rest is not entirely carbon.Khedive Rex said:
On another note, I'm amazed that Iodine and Helium are having a conversation! Truly, the elements are evolving, as Sir Isaac Newton knew they would.
