If EA took over *blank*

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bafrali

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Mar 6, 2012
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If EA took over Capcom

-Dragons Dogma would get a dissapointing sequal in one year.
-Okami would get a sequal where you play as a grizzly bear.
-Resident Evil would become an FPS with annual sequals and tacked-on zombie mode.
-DMC reboot would be rebooted again and be retconned with Dante's Inferno
-Long awaited SFxMK crossover would be made with a sequal alredy planned.(fatalities ahoy)
-Megaman ACT ZERO.
 

Isalan

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Jun 9, 2008
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EA takes over Bethesda.

Bug fixes are now DLC, and the Taliban invade Tamriel.

Also, 80 gagillion pieces of horse armor DLC.

Oh, and super mutants are changed to terrorists to broaden appeal.

Behold your future and weep. Our children will pay the price.
 

yuval152

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Jul 6, 2011
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EA takes over Radical Entertainment

every year the protagonist of the last game turns some random guy into superman and then the protagonist of the prequel turns into an generic antagonist,new protagonist kills the antagonist and it keeps as a cycle.

And you get 3 free powers and for more powers you need to pay 10$ each or some 70$ bundle.
 

Vault101

I'm in your mind fuzz
Sep 26, 2010
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SmashLovesTitanQuest said:
So you agree, I assume? Didn't really prove me wrong there.
no, I was saying WELL DUH everybody knows Jacob is bland....its an accepted fact...most of the other characters however (including jack) are much better

basically what I'm saying is if I had to pick a charachter to show off how cool ME charachters were...I wouldn't pick Jacob..no one...would pick jacob

its like me trying to convince someone how awesome the N64 was by showing them Superman 64

[quote/]I recommend you get Gears of War or something. It's bland, but it does what ME does wrong correctly in the gameplay department.
[/quote]

I didn't say I need/wanted a substitute because I found ME3 lacking...I found it (and so did many others) just fine

always been wanting to try Gears of war..but no Xbox

[quote/](I also like how you say "all those people" as if it's the most popular co-op game out there. It's going to be a ghost town in 6 months tops.[/quote]

don't put words into my mouth, that's not what I ment to imply at all... its just people have been playing it (had no trouble getting a game) as for how much longer who knows..I'm not calling it eather way

some people actually did enjoy the gameplay remember
[quote/]
Yeah, well, sorry dude. It's gonna happen on internet forums, people are going to dislike things you like. And to be fair, ME3 wasn't exactly a masterpiece.[/quote]

yeah I know..opinion blah blah blah blah

so you have yours and I have mine....
 

yaydod

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Nov 29, 2011
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EA takes over Frictional Games.
Who needs to hide from horrible creatures that come from the deepest horrors of your soul when you have a LASER MACHINGUN and every thing EXPLODES.
That is because they need to appeal to a broader audience for the next Amnesia, but they will have to sell 5Billion copies since they need to show to the whole world that the protagonist is a human man hooked on steroids since his tender age and he can wield a Bazooka while holding to a booth babes tits.
 

Chimpzy_v1legacy

Warning! Contains bananas!
Jun 21, 2009
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Tiddles said:
The Mana games - Now with online multiplayer.
That could actually be really interesting.

An action rpg where all of your party members are real players. If done well, co-op could be a breath of fresh air in the increasingly stale jrpg genre.

Then again, we're talking EA, so ...
 

Mysterious Druid

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May 27, 2012
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If EA took over Double Fine

90% of the money made for the point and click game would be used on marketing, the game itself would be turned into a generic FPS, and the final boss would be defeated by the player saying what their favourite colour is to the Kinect.
 

NionDrakyr

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Nov 18, 2009
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Is it just me or do I notice something here?


Satan - Demon of pride, "We're going to continue making award-winning games and services played by more than 300 million people worldwide." (after winning worst company)

Mammon - Demon of greed. Cut out 30% of your game and sold it back to you, u mad?

Asmodeus - Demon of lust. Reproduces franchises annually

Leviathan - Demon of envy. Trying to replicate Steam.

Beelzebub - Demon of gluttony. Ate up Bullfrog and is in the process of devouring Bioware.

Amon - Demon of Wrath. Smashes up Origin accounts with the banhammer.

Belphegor - Demon of sloth. Sits on its IP until the day after never.


This means if EA took over Activision, they would become THE PRIME EVIL.
 

SoMuchSpace

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Mar 27, 2012
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EA takes over Eidos Montreal

- Deus Ex 4 : Warfighting Zombie Apocalypse lens flare dub step field effect HD released

- New pre order bonus!Pay $15 to experience the game in a special brown and grey filter!

- Introducing Augmentation Market : Buy augmentations that allow you to jump up 2 feet and
- another augmentation that allows you have 2 more health squares!Only for the price of $10!

- For a broader appeal DE4 now includes alien soldier ninjas that can be defeated only after completing a tower defense game!Something for every one!

- An extra $5 and you get to see the developers only ending!!!

The games sells 4 million units, ea goes NO.DE4 NEEDED TO SELL 6 MILLION COPIES YOU TWATS!.EM is shut down.

EA takes over thechineseroom (devs of dear esther)

- Dear Esther : Esther's revenge is released.A minigun and laser cannon is given to esther as she attempts to take over the Hebrides islands that are infested with korean soldiers

- For an extra $15 you get to see esther performing a 1 minute execution animation on the weak soldiers!!

- New multi player : US Seals Vs Koreans!This has nothing to do with Dear esther, but who cares!!

- New multi player skin pack : play as a green korean or an orange seal!!!!Choices for everyone!!!!!!Costs only $20

- Introducing Dear esther premium for $59.99... includes 1 mulit player pack, 2 skins, a laser cannon bazooka and an assassin outfit for esther!!!
 

The Artificially Prolonged

Random Semi-Frequent Poster
Jul 15, 2008
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If EA took over Insomniac Games. No more fun interesting gun designs in Rachet & Clank and Resistance is changed to a modern realistic setting to be the latest COD competitor *shudders*

That said EA are working with Insomniac on the Overstrike game, which does look like great. However I'm already slightly worried that EA might be lining Insomniac as their next studio to completely ruin once they're finished with Bioware.
 

Dryk

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Dec 4, 2011
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SmashLovesTitanQuest said:
My problem with Cortez is him being gay is his only real personality trait. Him being gay is what people remember him by. That's exactly what I'm talking about when I say it's being shoved in your face, or that Bioware characters are terrible. They are all one dimensional husks with a single cliche separating them from everyone else. Cortez is gay, Jacob is black, Jack is an angsty teenagers, and on and on it goes. These characters have NOTHING else. There are one or two notable exceptions to this rule, but that's it.
I don't remember Jacob being black ever coming up. If you want to criticise them for being one-dimensional do it right and just make a list of them with "Daddy issues" next to it
 

GreyJedi

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Sep 22, 2009
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SmashLovesTitanQuest said:
Dryk said:
I don't remember Jacob being black ever coming up.
Yeah, I mean, apart from his skin being dark and all.
If anything, he was a Latino. And yes, his personality was rather bland. But I still think you can't say that about the majority of ME3's major characters.
 

CaptainMarvelous

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May 9, 2012
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GreyJedi said:
SmashLovesTitanQuest said:
Dryk said:
I don't remember Jacob being black ever coming up.
Yeah, I mean, apart from his skin being dark and all.
If anything, he was a Latino. And yes, his personality was rather bland. But I still think you can't say that about the majority of ME3's major characters.
Jacob was black o_O. James was Latino. Which in no way justifies Smash's statement they're all bland characters just because you appear to have got them mixed up. There is a high percentage of 1-Dimensional characters but some of them are awesome, Garrus and Tali for example.

OT: EA buys out Grasshopper Studios. The release rate for games actually goes down, they start including DLC and doing direct sequels and lose any sense of joy or creativity as Suda 51 is 'respectfully asked to step down'. I still remember the fear when I saw EA's logo on the Shadows of the Damned box *shiver*
 

The Forces of Chaos

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Mar 25, 2010
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EA takes over Relic and trying to milk every franchise. I think EA's board may get lynched by angry fans if that ever happened.
 

Alternative

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Jun 2, 2010
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GreyJedi said:
If anything, he was a Latino. And yes, his personality was rather bland. But I still think you can't say that about the majority of ME3's major characters.
Most of Mass effects character development happens between games. thats the problem I have with it.

almost every major change is handled during the intermission between games.
 

hooksashands

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Apr 11, 2010
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They take over Mojang and charge your credit card whenever Minecraft updates. People who play the cracked version are, of course, unaffected by this.