If you woke up beside the above Escapist's avatar....

[CounterAttack]

I do hope you aren't planning on using that on me...
Anyway, who am I wrapping my wings around for a few hours?

 

[A random person]

I just disturbed you, didn't I. It's OK, I'm also into perfectly gentle, vanilla snuggling.

 

[Kaboose the Moose]

Undoubtedly a frigid experience.

 

[CounterAttack]

All right then. Come here, you. *beckons*

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

...This isn't so bad...Spare a smoke?

 

[A random person]

I'm on it.
*uses Raising Heart to light cigarette*

 

[CounterAttack]

Ew. I hate smokers.

 

[Troublesome Lagomorph]

Try to make you shout "Candle Jack is

 

[Code Monkey]

Be agraid. Be very afraid. I think that's the most annoyed I've ever seen anyone, ever.

 

[CounterAttack]

Now, where were we? *winks at ARP's avatar*

 

[Pimppeter2]

I would ask where they put the cheese wizz.

 

[Code Monkey]

I would weep, having done the deed with an Emo.

 

[Pimppeter2]

I would weep, having done the deep with an underage boy.

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

'...You know, I'm not going to lie, I think the monocle won me over.'

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

...You're a kinky bugger, you know that?

 

[Kaboose the Moose]

I hope the smoke didn't get into your eyes!

 

[Pimppeter2]

I would ask him where my Koala is