Immaturity in a guy/girl

[Shinigami214]

I'll provide an example to put this in perspective. He once said, in front of an ex (he was with her at the time) and all of her friends, that she had a "tight fanny".

Now...surely, common sense would tell you that this is a bad idea? She dumped him, yet he blamed her. Actually, every one of his ex's finished with him, but he blames them for being "psychotic" or "selfish", or umpteen other excuses. So it's not like I'm exaggerating or misinterpreting his behaviour.

This might sound harsh, but how on earth did you ever even consider dating a twerp like this?

Reading over the thread, I'd have to say that despite how everyone is firing off definitions of what 'maturity' and 'immaturity' is (hilariously even to what extent a guy talks about the size of his shlong) I'd have to point out that maturity (and its opposite) involve everything you guys have mentioned. All at once.

Maturity combines experiences of real life, ranging from interacting with other people, to having to work hard for what you achieve, to how one handles relationships, failure, success, rejection, praise etc.

Basically - its how to function as stable human being, something we're all learning how to do - all the time - no matter how old or young.

Of course, its obvious why people who move out early, or see their parents breaking up, or have to raise siblings themselves due to maybe a parent passing away would mature faster. They've had to handle more of what life throws at them - broadening their experiences and perspective far beyond those who never found themselves in even remotely similar situations.

I consider myself fairly mature by now - every failure/disappointment/mistake was a learning experience, something that lets you avoid similar pitfalls in the future. 'Maturity' itself is a 'pinnacle' that, I would imagine, is about as achievable as nirvana itself. Ephemeral, yet always tantalizingly within reach.

 

[Ponch]

I don't mind immature people too much, as long as it's "Hey, lets have stupid fun!" immature, not "Lol, poo jokes" immature.

But those jokes are my bread & butter!

OT: I know far too many people who are immature. I just tell them I don't like it and try to avoid them.

 

[nick n stuff]

i'm really immature. fart jokes, words that sound like other ruder words, "that's what she said" jokes. stupid shit like that but i'm not alone so i dont feel to bad.

 

[Orange Monkey]

Abit of immaturity is good in a guy I think, but he should know when to turn it on or off.
I mean a sign of maturity, is the ability to be immature. But if your immature all the time thats horrible too.

 

[Ildecia]

Well, for me, anything that makes me step back and say: "Dude. Just no." Constitutes immaturity. That being said, not much makes me do that.

I'm a giant child at heart. Nothing will change this. Personally I find that a good quality, but there ARE times when one needs to be serious. The lack of recognition of "serious times" also constitutes immaturity, in my eyes.

If they think something is fun, that I stop thinking was fun years ago, I say they're immature.
It's how it works.

For example: A lot of people consider me immature for I still play Pokémon.

Pokemon is still awesome. If I'm immature for that, then sue me.

everything here basically... and when people think its funny to mess with EVERYTHING of yours. I wear a hat to school. i like to keep my things to myself, and i don't like it when people fuck with my stuff, even after i say don't do that. Then i get angry and they get indignant at me about it and i tell them "well sucks for you, you made me idoit."

I guess this is more of a personal problem, but i think the real thing i'm saying is when people just don't know when to stop.

 

[Jack and Calumon]

In a guy, Talking about the size of his Penis, ALOT.

In a girl, Drinking alot and believing everyone wants her.

Calumon: Jack says I can be immature. : (

Wait, Calumon talks about his...EWWWWWW! =P.

>.< Calumon doesn't have a gender thus I try to avoid using "He" or "She", so... It's more Childish immaturity.

Calumon: What? What?

Okay. I don't know a lot beyond the season of Digimon where they armor digivolve, so I thought Calumon was male, as I could have sworn that you have used male pronouns for Calumon before. Sorry about that, I just found that combining what you said with what Calumon said was amusing.

Relax man, not biting your head off.

Calumon: Unless you want him to! ^^

 

[Rachel317]

This might sound harsh, but how on earth did you ever even consider dating a twerp like this?

Reading over the thread, I'd have to say that despite how everyone is firing off definitions of what 'maturity' and 'immaturity' is (hilariously even to what extend a guy talks about the size of his shlong) I'd have to point out that maturity (and its opposite) involve everything you guys have mentioned. All at once.

I think your post has been one of the best ways of putting things so far. Thing is, just about everyone has had SOME kind of hardship, one way or another, just...some people learn from it and improve themselves, others don't.

You know what? I didn't realise what he was like at first. I mean, it's only been a month, and already I'm having to consider whether this can go any further. In regards to what Tetranitrophenol said, it's not just about the fact that he's not academically brilliant, but I need more stimulating conversation than sex with old people.

It's good that you've taken your hardships as learning experiences. That's why I assumed most people did, until now.

 

[Klarinette]

Quite simply, there's a time to be serious, and a time to be ridiculous. I think part of maturity is being able to know when those times are.

You said it much better than I did.

*shrug* I think people try to make it a little more complicated than it has to be, really. Obviously there are things that branch off from each and little tweaks you can make get more specific, but I think it's a pretty simple thing.

 

[Rachel317]

everything here basically... and when people think its funny to mess with EVERYTHING of yours. I wear a hat to school. i like to keep my things to myself, and i don't like it when people fuck with my stuff, even after i say don't do that. Then i get angry and they get indignant at me about it and i tell them "well sucks for you, you made me idoit."

I guess this is more of a personal problem, but i think the real thing i'm saying is when people just don't know when to stop.

There's a fine line between immaturity and stupidity. Those guys who mess with your stuff sound like they're in both categories.

Kids at school are the worst, especially in the teenage years. They're a bunch of hormone-fuelled idiots. You just gotta keep on plugging away, trying to do your best, and ignoring those assholes. You're a better person than them if you DON'T do that stuff, so good for you.

 

[AMMO Kid]

One girl I know likes me and I kind of liked her to, but then she started agreeing with everything I said. MAJOR TURNOFF. Anytime a girl or guy agrees with everything the person they have a crush on says, its immaturity

 

[DefunctTheory]

One girl I know likes me and I kind of liked her to, but then she started agreeing with everything I said. MAJOR TURNOFF. Anytime a girl or guy agrees with everything the person they have a crush on says, its immaturity

No, its just stupidity brought on by being smitten (And the reason why most 'nice' guys never get laid).

 

[MBergman]

Hi

I search bar-ed this, and didn't find anything exactly like this so, if there ARE topics of the same, I apologise in advance!

Basically, what constitutes as immaturity to you? Would you date someone who was immature? If so, how long would you put up with them before you got shot of 'em?

I ask because I'm dating a guy who is pretty immature. He might be normal for his age (he's almost 21), but I'm only 19 and live away from home (studying for a degree), which has forced me to grow up a bit so...maybe my expectations of him are too high, because I'M mature for my age? I don't want that to make me sound like a douche bag!!

I know there are some well-rounded people on here, so I'd really appreciate anyone's advice! Or you can share similar stories and how you resolved them.

I reckon immaturity has a lot to do with personal values and point of view. For example, a friend of mine has accused me of being immature for watching 'Winnie the Poo' att my age. (20) Personally, I think using my free time to watch 'Winnie the Poo' is time spent very well and not immature at all.

Anyways, if you find this guy immature and irritating is there any point to still being with him? If you like him I can get why you'd stay with him, in that case I guess you just got to ask yourself how much your willing to endure and/or if maybe he'll outgrow it before you slay him in his sleep.

 

[AwesomeExpress]

On thing to remember is that usually girls mature faster than guys. But for this case, he's 21, it's time for him to start becoming more mature. I'd say it depends on how bad his immaturity is, for whether you dump him or not.

 

[Allyosaugh]

In a guy, Talking about the size of his Penis, ALOT.

In a girl, Drinking alot and believing everyone wants her.

This.
Also being incredibly sheltered.

 

[child of lileth]

I usually only date people older than me, just because anyone a few years younger tend to be way too immature for me to handle being around for long periods of time. I don't mind someone like that, but I want to be able to have a conversation every now and then, and not have the whole relationship be about 'other things'. I can't stand if they can't take any kind of responsibility for anything involving them either. It just ends up making me frustrated when I have to be around them.

If the person is someone I intend to be with for a long time, then I can try to let some immaturity go, especially if they know when it's okay to be like that. But if they are that way all the time, I can't handle being with them.

 

[Tharwen]

I think true immaturity isn't laughing at penis jokes and stuffz liek that. I think it's more about what you value.

Calumon: Jack says I can be immature. : (

Don't worry, Calumon. I don't think you're immature.

 

[SuccessAndBiscuts]

This whole thread has rung fairly true, im in pretty much the same situation the OP is in. (but im a guy) In all honestly I don't dislike her as much as I just dont think she is right for me so our days are numbered. Just need to find the best way to do it.

An example would be when I make a comment about something daft she has done and get the response "lol im so random, have the mental age of like an 8 year old"

1: this happens too often to be unintentional

2: we are sexually active

even if its an exageration it still makes me feel awquard as hell.

For clarity purposes: im 20 she is 19

 

[Rachel317]

I guess you just got to ask yourself how much your willing to endure and/or if maybe he'll outgrow it before you slay him in his sleep.

You just made my day

 

[Flames66]

I ask because I'm dating a guy who is pretty immature. He might be normal for his age (he's almost 21), but I'm only 19 and live away from home (studying for a degree), which has forced me to grow up a bit so...maybe my expectations of him are too high, because I'M mature for my age? I don't want that to make me sound like a douche bag!!

What do you mean by Immature Behaviour?

 

[darth gditch]

Immaturity to me is when someone doesn't know when to act seriously, and/or doesn't consider the reactions of others before saying something or doing something.

I'm all for fun, carrying on, and generally goofing off, but a mature person knows when to be serious, focused, and down to business. A mature person thinks logically before he/she acts.