Is marriage worth it?

[EeveeElectro]

it might be worth it if you spell it correctly

other than that...

And... If we break up I'll keep the house. Woohoo!

This statement right here is the exact reason why I'll never settle down. I'm just too paranoid.

You should get a giant saw and cut the house in half =)
kekekek... haven't slept in 3 days...

 

[Dogstile]

Marriage means you get to spread your genes and raise kids, have regular sex, have someone clean up after you, have a girl to love and snuggle with forever, so its good

divorce not so forever now is it?

 

[JaredXE]

Why do people keep saying that marriage gives you regular sex? That's so not true it isn't even funny. Many women today are taught, whether implied or explicitly, that sex is a tool to get men, and once you get them and pop out a little 18-year annuity or two, then they don't have to ever have it again.


Oh, and saying something critical and truthful about a woman or women in general is NOT sexist, but they will play the begreaved minority card faster than you can say the Ghost of Johnny Cochran. As the sexual assault organization on my campus likes to spout: "Men are at fault for everything and don't you let them forget it!".

I got shouted out for rationally explaining that the average 78 cents that women make compared to the average $1 that men make is due to men accepting much more dangerous/stupid jobs.

Yeah, that whole $.78 thing is actually a load of crap. In fact, women in many fields earn MORE than a man doing the same job. The thing is, and it's something that most women never disclose for fear of their righteous anger at being underpaid exposed for the lie it is, is that women inherently choose jobs that allow them to interact with family and have a more balanced life. A working mother wouldn't think twice at leaving early or showing up late or using vacation days to drive little billy or suzy to ballet/soccer/doctors/tae kwon do. Men though USUALLY (not always) work to the exclusion of anything else and rarely take sick days or vacations. Hence why we die earlier too.

And yes, men take more hazardous jobs and jobs requiring being big and strong and all manly....and because these jobs suck, are dangerous and are on the whole more physically demanding......we get paid more to do them.

 

[Pinstar]

If you are that paranoid about money at the expense of love, then just get a pre-nup.

As a married man who is joined up without a pre-nup, I am technically in 'danger' of all those bad things you mentioned in your above wall of text. But am I afraid? No. Just because someone *can* do something to you, doesn't mean they will.

If you are in constant fear of your special someone departing with half of your stuff and your next decade worth of paychecks, then there isn't the bond present to get married in the first place.

In other words, You're doing it wrong!

well I can tell you that your pre-nup will most likely mean nothing in court, and if you move to a state you didn't file it in, its basicly worthless.

and how would you know the bond isn't there? it's completely normal to be wary of a risk that can ruin your life, and to ignore it because things are good at the moment shows a lack of forethought.

besides, you found a woman you love who agreed to a pre-nup, and I wish the best of luck if you ever need it.. I can find a woman who doesn't need a piece of paper and a rock to be in love or have a commitment. This isn't the 50's after all

I said I DON'T have a pre-nup. And I'm not fearful regardless.

Yes it is natural to be wary and fearful of losing your possessions, as that is a danger that can come with marriage.

It is also natural to be wary of being killed in a car accident. By your logic, you would avoid driving at all due to that risk.

Driving is a lot like marriage. There are some pretty harsh statistics out there on the number of bad things that happen to people who participate in either activity. With some care, you can mitigate your own personal chances of being a statistic. However, both activities have quite a few cases of wonderful outcomes that aren't reported in the news. After all, who wants to report on a truck that isn't on fire?

 

[Nurb]

If you are that paranoid about money at the expense of love, then just get a pre-nup.

As a married man who is joined up without a pre-nup, I am technically in 'danger' of all those bad things you mentioned in your above wall of text. But am I afraid? No. Just because someone *can* do something to you, doesn't mean they will.

If you are in constant fear of your special someone departing with half of your stuff and your next decade worth of paychecks, then there isn't the bond present to get married in the first place.

In other words, You're doing it wrong!

well I can tell you that your pre-nup will most likely mean nothing in court, and if you move to a state you didn't file it in, its basicly worthless.

and how would you know the bond isn't there? it's completely normal to be wary of a risk that can ruin your life, and to ignore it because things are good at the moment shows a lack of forethought.

besides, you found a woman you love who agreed to a pre-nup, and I wish the best of luck if you ever need it.. I can find a woman who doesn't need a piece of paper and a rock to be in love or have a commitment. This isn't the 50's after all

I said I DON'T have a pre-nup. And I'm not fearful regardless.

Yes it is natural to be wary and fearful of losing your possessions, as that is a danger that can come with marriage.

It is also natural to be wary of being killed in a car accident. By your logic, you would avoid driving at all due to that risk.

Driving is a lot like marriage. There are some pretty harsh statistics out there on the number of bad things that happen to people who participate in either activity. With some care, you can mitigate your own personal chances of being a statistic. However, both activities have quite a few cases of wonderful outcomes that aren't reported in the news. After all, who wants to report on a truck that isn't on fire?

well I misunderstood you in the beginning there, but what I say still stands; its wrong for one party to have no risk associated to marriage while another does.

 

[DarkRyter]

Marriage is worth something, cause at least, maybe for just awhile, maybe for even a moment, those two people are happy.

 

[DeathsAmbassador]

While I'm not married, my view on it is that it's something that should only be done if you love that one person and want to be with them for the rest of your life. Otherwise it's probably just gonna fail. But I guess I wouldn't know.

 

[Summerstorm]

Well... I can never marry a woman. How can you say that you will always love her, and be with her till death do you part? It is a lie...(Or at least uncertain). I cannot lie. So...

I don't think that marriage how it is now is not possible for me. Without that vow, maybe.

 

[ScarlettRage]

I think marrige can be incredibly beautiful, binding yourself to the person you love.
Though it's not for everyone.

exactly
you have to find that person that you can be sure that you can make it work with

 

[Sanguinedragon]

Wow you guys must have seriously bad luck or experiences.
Married 14 years this 31st.
Good sex life good communication.
Is it easy? hell no, is it possible hell yes
It's called, respect ,communication and appreciation, works well try it

 

[JaredXE]

Driving is a lot like marriage. There are some pretty harsh statistics out there on the number of bad things that happen to people who participate in either activity. With some care, you can mitigate your own personal chances of being a statistic. However, both activities have quite a few cases of wonderful outcomes that aren't reported in the news. After all, who wants to report on a truck that isn't on fire?

Because a truck ISN'T supposed to be on fire, that is the status quo of a truck. Just like a marriage ISN'T supposed to end in divorce. But since over 50% of marriages end in divorce, would YOU like to buy a car that has a 50/50 chance of catching on fire?

 

[TerribleTerryTate]

Agree with the OP pretty much word for word. My experience of marriage is also very similar to yours, have had two friends (one male and one female) who got married and both marriages lasted less than three years. They went from being a happy couple living together, to getting a divorce and hating the sight of one another. My parents are married, but are far from happy, I'd guess if they were around ten years younger, they would've divorced. Are currently only together because I think they're scared of being alone at quite an elderly age.

I'll stick with being in a relationship. I don't see much difference at all between a relationship and getting married. Why complicate things.

 

[DN83]

It all depends on what you feel for the person themself.

 

[Pinstar]

If you are that paranoid about money at the expense of love, then just get a pre-nup.

As a married man who is joined up without a pre-nup, I am technically in 'danger' of all those bad things you mentioned in your above wall of text. But am I afraid? No. Just because someone *can* do something to you, doesn't mean they will.

If you are in constant fear of your special someone departing with half of your stuff and your next decade worth of paychecks, then there isn't the bond present to get married in the first place.

In other words, You're doing it wrong!

well I can tell you that your pre-nup will most likely mean nothing in court, and if you move to a state you didn't file it in, its basicly worthless.

and how would you know the bond isn't there? it's completely normal to be wary of a risk that can ruin your life, and to ignore it because things are good at the moment shows a lack of forethought.

besides, you found a woman you love who agreed to a pre-nup, and I wish the best of luck if you ever need it.. I can find a woman who doesn't need a piece of paper and a rock to be in love or have a commitment. This isn't the 50's after all

I said I DON'T have a pre-nup. And I'm not fearful regardless.

Yes it is natural to be wary and fearful of losing your possessions, as that is a danger that can come with marriage.

It is also natural to be wary of being killed in a car accident. By your logic, you would avoid driving at all due to that risk.

Driving is a lot like marriage. There are some pretty harsh statistics out there on the number of bad things that happen to people who participate in either activity. With some care, you can mitigate your own personal chances of being a statistic. However, both activities have quite a few cases of wonderful outcomes that aren't reported in the news. After all, who wants to report on a truck that isn't on fire?

If you are that paranoid about money at the expense of love, then just get a pre-nup.

As a married man who is joined up without a pre-nup, I am technically in 'danger' of all those bad things you mentioned in your above wall of text. But am I afraid? No. Just because someone *can* do something to you, doesn't mean they will.

If you are in constant fear of your special someone departing with half of your stuff and your next decade worth of paychecks, then there isn't the bond present to get married in the first place.

In other words, You're doing it wrong!

well I can tell you that your pre-nup will most likely mean nothing in court, and if you move to a state you didn't file it in, its basicly worthless.

and how would you know the bond isn't there? it's completely normal to be wary of a risk that can ruin your life, and to ignore it because things are good at the moment shows a lack of forethought.

besides, you found a woman you love who agreed to a pre-nup, and I wish the best of luck if you ever need it.. I can find a woman who doesn't need a piece of paper and a rock to be in love or have a commitment. This isn't the 50's after all

I said I DON'T have a pre-nup. And I'm not fearful regardless.

Yes it is natural to be wary and fearful of losing your possessions, as that is a danger that can come with marriage.

It is also natural to be wary of being killed in a car accident. By your logic, you would avoid driving at all due to that risk.

Driving is a lot like marriage. There are some pretty harsh statistics out there on the number of bad things that happen to people who participate in either activity. With some care, you can mitigate your own personal chances of being a statistic. However, both activities have quite a few cases of wonderful outcomes that aren't reported in the news. After all, who wants to report on a truck that isn't on fire?

well I misunderstood you in the beginning there, but what I say still stands; its wrong for one party to have no risk associated to marriage while another does.

You think of risk as merely financial risk. There are more factors to life than just finances. If you look at it from an evolutionary/biological standpoint, women have MUCH more risk than men when it comes to relationships involving reproduction. A man need only commit one night's 'work' to seed a child, while a woman endures 9 months, not to mention the risk of birth itself.

Modern society has attempted to 'correct' this imbalance by leaning financial penalties against males who 'seed and run'.

I do agree with you that some laws have been carried far past their original intent and now swing unfairly in favor of women. In that sense, I assert that the laws regarding divoce itself are unfair, but the institution of marriage is fair. There are many legal benefits to marriage.

I work in a payroll company. I see first hand the penalties lodged against some men in the form of child support payments in their paychecks... I also see the tax benefits to workers who are filing under the 'married' status versus single. From my observations, the amount of money lost to child support payments doesn't hold a candle to the amount of money saved in income taxes by filing married when looking at a cross section of all workers. If you want to look at it statistically, you're more likely to save money than lose it by getting married.

 

[bad rider]

Surely marriage is more about loving and caring than just a "one sided contract", to be honest if you get screwed over by your respective partner, surely its you own damn fault for marrying wrongly.

Edit: Is wrongly a word these days? Oh well I'll just chuck it on my, probably a word board.

 

[A random person]

I'll say this about divorce: I think that, unless there are kids, divorce should be a simple, painless procedure with no property splitting. It would get rid of "gold-diggers" and the legal and financial pains you have to go through if you made the wrong choice with who to marry. The couples who stay together would be the ones who actually love each other, and the only argument for not having such easy divorces (if no children are involved) is that they're somehow immoral, and I for one don't buy that.

But as for if marriage is worth it, if you love who you're with and observe the seven year rule for the following reason:

Perhaps most couples are not observing the Seven-year rule before getting married, thus higher divorce rate.

I 100% support this. If you can't stand to date for 7 years, how can you stand to be married?

then go for it.

 

[LongLiveourMachine]

Actually the reason why most married couples stayed together in the old times is because they only lasted about 5 years because the women died in child birth so the husband would probably would have many different wifes in his lifetime. So I'm sure that if married couples from the olden days were brought to are time they probably divorse just like a lot of marrriges today.

 

[The_Echo]

Some people rush into marriage, assuming that's the next step they should take. That's not the case. People should only get married when both of them are ready, not because they feel they should.

 

[JaredXE]

Actually the reason why most married couples stayed together in the old times is because they only lasted about 5 years because the women died in child birth so the husband would probably would have many different wifes in his lifetime. So I'm sure that if married couples from the olden days were brought to are time they probably divorse just like a lot of marrriges today.

Really? I thought it was because divorce was either forbidden and/or a real fucking hardship to go through in that it actually required proof of wrongdoing. Todays no fault divorces are a HUGE reason why marriage is going down the tubes since you can just drop someone for no reason without trying to work through your problems. Hell, you can sue for divorce and the other person doesn't even have to consent or participate!

 

[Akai Shizuku]

Marriage is a beautiful thing...when it works.

And it usually doesn't because love usually doesn't work. It's the best feeling in the world until it collapses. Which it does. Pretty much always. As to every rule, there are exceptions to this...but this is how it usually plays out.

Also, guys, come on, let's be honest. How many of us really understand women? I sure as hell don't. I don't hate them or anything, but I've spent my whole life around them and I just don't get them.

But then again, I understand other men even less.