Last time, we finished our affairs on Manaan, and are off for our next destination: Kashyyyk!
Bye, bye, Manaan.
Meanwhile, in Galaxy Sector ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha...
A Sith Lord...being fairly reasonable and logical...?
WHAT DEVILRY IS THIS?
Apprentice...? Somehow, I don't picture Malak as being the kind of guy to take someone under his wing, so to speak.
Wait a minute...
It's Corporal Tutorial's killer!
And, if his armor didn't already mark him as cartoonishly evil, he kills three bystanders for nothing more than
shits and giggles.
"
ALSO, DID YOU JUST KILL THREE TROOPERS AND BLOW UP ONE OF THE TERMINALS WE NEED TO PILOT THIS SHIP?"
"Uh...yes?"
"
THAT'S MY BOY. GO AHEAD AND CHOKE A FEW PRISONERS ON THE WAY OUT."
Back on the Ebon Hawk, Varen is having yet another prophetic dream...
Well, that was really nice. I do love the look of this planet.
"Do you think the wookiees are involved? I smell a walking-carpet conspiracy."
Bastila has little else to say, so we disembark the Ebon Hawk. Unfortunately, an Ithorian is there to give us orders.
"The Czerka Corporation will see to your needs, Madam, but there will be a docking fee of 100 credits. In advance, I fear."
"What do i get for my 100 credits?"
"Alright, fine. Here."
"I understand more than you know, insolent whelp."
So, welcome to Kashyyyk. It's green, and woody, and we'll be spending most of our time on it on these samey looking walkways. Seeing as its his homeworld, let's ask Zaalbar about it.
"What do you know about this world?"
"Prepared me? What do you mean?"
"Why were you forced to leave?"
"But... why didn't your father believe you?"
"Eh. Times pass. Things change."
"We'll deal with that if we have to. Let's go."
"...In general, or in this specific situation?"
Further down the catwalk, we meet these interesting fellows.
Well, looks like Captain Prick is in the house.
...Hutts are 100% backside? That is a horrifying thought. Wouldn't that mean Jabba's mouth doubles up as a...NO NO BAD THOUGHTS BAD THOUGHTS WHERE'S THE BLEACH
"Do you always enslave your debtors?"
So, this guy is basically David Cameron (or Bank of America for you yanks) IN SPACE!
"How much debt buys a man's life?"
"Do your Debtors have a habit of running off?"
We'll follow up on these guy's shenanigans later. For now, let's continue on.
...but Bastila is just ready to steal our thunder. *sigh*
"What do you want?"
"Do I have a choice?"
"Yep. And it's awesome."
foreshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowingforeshadowing
"No. You should try it yourself, sometime."
"It seems like you have your own demons to face."
"What?"
...well, that was weird. Does anyone else think that Bastila is going insane?
We stop into the local Czerka offices before we go into the jungle proper.
"Tell me about the planet. You called it a whole mess of numbers that no one outside a sci-fi universe would ever bother to remember."
Zaalbar does have his moments. A lot of the time, he can be rather boring. However, there are times where he is just 100% concentrated badass.
"Allow it more liberties? Are you talking about..."
"Oh, I am. This Wookiee slave is serving me faithfully. But, why do the Wookiees tolerate you doing this? Seems to me like a bunch of monstrous walking carpets wouldn't take kindly to their people being sold as slaves."
"Tell me what you mean or this floor is going to be covered in your own blood!"
"What is this leader's name?"
"What's the problem with this Chuundar guy, Zaalbar?"
"I'm through speaking with you for now."
Well, aren't you just dandy. I bet these guys have shares in the Umbrella Corporation...
As we leave, we are apprpached by a Twi'lek women clearly not wearing practical clothing.
"Don't be rude, Bastila. That's my job. (Ahem). What the hell do you want, lady? We're kinda on a life-threatening mission to save/subjugate the galaxy here!"
"What was that all about? I was too busy day-dreaming of ways I could torture that stupid lady for committing the heinous sin of daring to address me."
"I thought you and your mother didn't get along?"
So, unlike my usual system of finishing our business on the planet we're on before we go planet-hopping for sidequestin', I'm going to head to Tatooine now and do the quest, for... spoilery reasons.
So after an uneventful trip across the galaxy, we return to the arse end of the galaxy...
...anchorhead. We're bringing Mission along too, to finally complete the companion quest we got from her about a bajillion updates ago.
Along the road into town, we come across this charming individual.
"What the hell are you talking about?"
No, Pit Rancor is our name for Pit Rancor, suprisingly enough.
"Helena? Bastila, I think we found your mum."
"Is she still there?"
You said it. At least we Omnipotent Super Narrators are less susceptible to that sort of thing. Now, where's my tinfoil hat? I need it to block the transmissions from the Chocolators.
We pop in to the local Czerka office to inquire about Mission's missing brother.
"I'm looking for a miner named Griff."
"Ok, lady, I've had it up to here with your bullshit. Either you cure your selective fucking amnesia soon, or I'm going to become an interior decorator. And paint some walls red."
"...with blood?"
"Oh, heavens, no! No, I'll use your decapitated head's hair as a brush. Then I'll repaint the red paint over with blood."
"Yeah, that sounds like him."
"The Sand People? Not them AGAIN..."
"Did the Sand People kill Griff or not!?"
"Is there some type of reward for saving him?"
Industry standard? Somehow, I can't see Wal-Mart obsolving themselves of all guilt if a worker died on their premises. EA, though...
"I have to go. Goodbye."
With the Czerka officers throughly interrogated, we move on to the Cantina.
"Plus, the lighting in here is bloody awful. I can't even see your face properly."
"Hey, what are you looking at me for? I didn't even know the guy!"
"I wasn't talking to you, Varen! Though, come to think of it..."
"Only if she deserved it. Which was all the time."
Hey, that's how I treat my family in Fable, and they never seem to mind. As long as I let out a big long fart upon my return, all is well.
"Or...the guide killed him and set the Krayt Dragon up as the fall guy!"
"..."
"..."
"...what?"
"Why don't you get the Holocron yourself, Mrs. Helena?"
"Well, don't you want to find your father's remains, Bastila? I know I do. I just love desecrating graves of friends loved ones."
"What about your Mother's sickness?"
I love her tone as she says it, like a mother sending here daughter out pick up a loaf of bread from the shop down the road.
As we head out into the dunes, we come across this asshole again.
This time though, he's not an asshole, and let's us through.
Ah, warm nostalgia. Searing, blindingly hot, nostalgia. It feels like we first came here not 10 updates ago.
This is our first stop: the Sand People Enclave we wiped out on our last visit.
Suprisingly enough, there are actually Sand People here. Guess they were neighbors moving in to the now-vacant housing...
Some choking should remedy that.
And lighting, of course. Can't forget that.
Once all the Sand People have fallen, we can talk to our new friend.
"Why shouldn't I just kill you? I've no interest in a pathetic weakling like you."
"Fine. Go. Run to Anchorhead. The Sand People are all dead."
Y'know, she's
right there. Griff. You are staring right at her.
"Don't be so sure."
"Forget it! You're nothing but a deadbeat!"
"I'm glad you're not dead." Truly, the most kind and caring of remarks.
So, now that we've got that sorted, it's time to move on to Bastila's mother's request. And to do that...
...we return to another familiar location. This time, with less ridiculouly hard Sand People.
In the cave, we discover that this belt is all that remains of Bastila's father. Kinda grim, honestly.
Fortunately, the Holocron is there, so we can just leave and get back to...
...wait.
Oh, shit.
Dude, he literally died right where you are standing. This is more than a little ominous, no?
"You...you were on the Endar Spire! You killed Corporal Tutorial! You'll pay for that! He was MINE to kill! Die, feckless worm!"
...welp, we're fucked.
However, I'm going to have to break the tension, by posing a choice, corresponding to each of the Companion Quests.
In terms of Griff and Mission, should we...
-Get Griff back up on his feet and convince Mission that he was an all right guy after all?
-Don't help Griff get back up on his feet, but convince Mission that he was an all right guy after all anyway?
-Help Griff get back up on his feet, but convince Mission that he was a scumbag?
-Don't help Griff get back up on his feet, and convince Mission that he was a scumbag?
In terms of Bastila and her mother, should we...
-Give the Holocron to Bastila's mother,
or
-Keep it for ourselves?