Mall Fight RP: (CLOSED) (FINISHED)

[Sigma Castell]

"Yeah but dude look at this tiny ship man."
I squat down and watch the little Greek sailors scramble around their ship.
"Hehehehehe. They're totes adorbs yo."
I look at Trilby.
"Freezing. And full of betentacled hookers."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"I forgot how badass triremes are."

 

[Sigma Castell]

The mini-Greeks finally get their shit together and fire their ballista into my eye.
"Ow."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

"Sounds about right."
I take out my lighter and use it to set the trireme on fire.

 

[Paddy the Second]

"NNOOOOOO!"

 

[Sigma Castell]

"OH GOD WHY"
I stare at the tiny wooden ship, its sails blazing with fire. The sailors are jumping over the side and swimming to safety. One doesn't make it, and he dies screaming in the fire.
"THEY WERE SO YOUNG"

 

[Paddy the Second]

My tulpa stamps on the boat but is not solid enough to do it any harm. "It won't go out!"

 

[ShindoL Shill]

I start spraying lighter fluid into the goop, creating a fiery maze for the tiny Greeks to swim through. Unfortunately for them, it leads them in a circle back to the other side of the ship.

 

[Saltarius]

I step out of the wrecked van and rub my jaw.

"Yeah. Well, that plan's shot. Hey uh...guys."

 

[MinimanZombie]

I throw another brick at Salts head.

 

[Sigma Castell]

"Oh hey Salt! I hear you're taking up demon hunting?"

 

[Paddy the Second]

"SALT OLD BUDDY OLD PAL! Please help me."

 

[Saltarius]

"Well yeah! Everyone's picking up a...hook nowadays. Joe having a tulpa, you and your...antics, and Zombie being a fucking annoying **** who needs his lips sewn together and his limbs severed."

 

[MinimanZombie]

I throw another brick at Salt.

 

[Saltarius]

"But of course, his existence is a short one with little to no relevance to the current situation, or any situation to come. Regardless, I have an elderly black gentleman to catch."

I bust into a hunting goods store and grab a crossbow and as many bolts as I can carry.

 

[MinimanZombie]

I burn down the hunting goods store.
"...Dick biscuit."

 

[Saltarius]

"But anyways, I'm off. Shit to shoot, decrees to uphold, possible first big demon to hunt."

I chase after Wacon's trail, finally.

 

[MinimanZombie]

I trip Salt up as he begins chasing Wacon.
"Salt. Stop. Let's have a real talk quickly."

 

[Saltarius]

"Oh geez, must've tripped over a gnat."

I get back up and continuing on the trail.

 

[MinimanZombie]

I tackle Salt.
"Seriously, I just want to fucking talk. Don't you think you're heading into this too fast?"