MetroidNutQuest 2012

[Technetium]

>MNevote yourself to a bizarre cult of a neo-buddhist religion centered around the art of using milk to reproduce Bees for trafficking. It's a harsh reality

 

[MetroidNut]

>MN: Jump into STREET - breakdance.

I don't know what "JUMP" means!

 

[MetroidNut]

>MN: Be amazed no one has called the cops on the shady-looking guy jumping through windows and shaking around a firearm.

You realize that, come to think of it, the shrill, distant wail of a SIREN has been getting steadily louder and higher pitched over the last thirty seconds. And you appear to be wearing face-obscuring garb while pointing a DEUDLY FIREARM in the general direction of your NEIGHBOR'S HOUSE.

What will you do?

 

[MetroidNut]

>MNevote yourself to a bizarre cult of a neo-buddhist religion centered around the art of using milk to reproduce Bees for trafficking. It's a harsh reality.

Not the bees!

 

[VuvuZelaMan]

>MN: Throw MEATY FIST at NEIGHBOR'S HOUSE.

 

[Robert632]

>Get in the way of police car in such a way as to sue them

 

[SamuelT]

>MN: Seems you're out of time. Quick, adjust glasses so they don't sit crooked on your face and get back inside.

 

[Technetium]

>MN: Travel to an alternate Dimension. It looks exactly the same.

 

[MetroidNut]

>MN: Seems you're out of time. Quick, adjust glasses so they don't sit crooked on your face and get back inside.

Your AVIATORS aren't crooked, your MOUTH is! You hurry back inside your HOUSE regardless. You are now in the ENTRYWAY. From here, you have a veritable plethora of options! You can go to the DINING ROOM, the KITCHEN, the LIVING ROOM, or even up the STAIRS! You could even do something useful instead!

 

[MetroidNut]

>MN: Travel to an alternate Dimension. It looks exactly the same.

You do so. In this hellish realm, you discover to your shock that you are in fact TIME-TRAVELING at a speed of 1 SECOND PER SECOND.

 

[VuvuZelaMan]

>MN: Go into the KITCHEN and search for bacon.

 

[Pappytech]

>MN: Pick up the CHEKHOV'S GUN sitting on the HALLWAY SHELF.

 

[MetroidNut]

>MN: Pick up the CHEKHOV'S GUN sitting on the HALLWAY SHELF.

There is no shelf in this hallway! And even if there were, you're already armed, numbnuts!

 

[Robert632]

>SMASH your face into the wall opposite the door, finding your secret stash of actual weapons.

 

[MetroidNut]

>SMASH your face into the wall opposite the door, finding your secret stash of actual weapons.

You don't feel so good.

 

[VuvuZelaMan]

>MN: Vomit into the hole in the wall.

 

[MetroidNut]

>MN: Vomit into the hole in the wall.

The WALL is merely cracked. If you want to VOMIT into it, you'll need to find a way to create a full-fledged HOLE!