>Having found a dog and your MEATY FIST; begin the aforementioned ritual.
You bring your SHITTY AIRSOFT REVOLVER to your UGLY DOG's head, in preparation for the ritual.
You read about the ritual online, about a month ago. It was pretty obviously posted by some TROLL. The guy was a complete dick, but surprisingly funny, until he got rightfully banned. As your way of honoring his work, you decided to commit his "ritual" to memory, and one day perform it. You think he would appreciate the gesture.
But that's not entirely true. All your life, you have been plagued by a soft voice whispering into you mind. It spoke only vague, incoherent nothings - and yet, somehow, you invariably understood what it was trying to tell you. It concerned you at first, but you eventually came to recognize it for what it was: the voice of your subconscious mind. The expression of your deepest desires. The guardian of countless secrets known not even to you.
Your subconscious frequently tells you to do the usual things. To ask a pretty girl on a date; to ignore whatever unpleasant task you've been assigned in favor of the sweet opiates of mass media. But that day, a month ago, your subconscious became strangely enthralled by the dark mystique surrounding the TROLL's so-called "ritual". The incoherent nothings whispered nonsense in your ear, and you understood what you were being told - that you needed to perform the ritual.
Consciously, you're fully aware that shooting your UGLY DOG with an AIRSOFT REVOLVER will do absolutely nothing, regardless of any incantations you might say beforehand. The DOG probably won't even feel it. It's a pretty stupid ritual.
But as you chant the required phrases of pseudo-Latin, the black depths of your mind hope, and what's more, firmly believe, that the ritual will open an irreversible pathway leading beyond the veil of shadows.
Either that or somebody's been slipping PCP into your soda again.
Will you pull the trigger? (Y/N)
