Most awkward talk you've had with your parents.

[SextusMaximus]

Man all you guys conversations are lame. Porn, sex and masturbation? That's the most awkward talks you've had with you're parents, really?

I've had conversations with mine where the opening sentance was essentially "Son, I want to talk to you about why you're such a pathetic failure".

Introduce him to World of Warcraft...

OT: From my relatively young age I've never had any 'Talks' but I know most of it from a van that came to our school every thursday.

We called it the shaggin wagon... it was quite funny at the time.

 

[Aloran]

After a nice meal between my family and the family of a good friend, where I spent much of it talking to the other family's very attractive daughter, my rather drunk father confronted me in the kitchen of our house after we arrived home.

"You know Alex? (the girl)"
"Errm...yeah dad?"
"I think you should shag her."
"WHAT?!"
"She's in need of a good shagging, that's all I'm saying."
"errrrm...thanks dad."

I walked away very quickly after that.

 

[epic_ellen]

Dad found /b/ one day.

So. Yeeeaaaah... [http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/SoYeah]

The only thing that could be worse would be if he found you on TvTropes. 'Cause you'd never seem him again because HE WOULD BE ADDICTED FOREVER.

OT, one of my friends is gay and I'm taking him to my formal and my mum said this really awkward speech in the car about how she's proud that I'm comfortable hanging around people of different 'persuasions'. I just sat with a :| face for the entire time.

 

[Jenova65]

Dad found /b/ one day.

So. Yeeeaaaah... [http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/SoYeah]

Man, I hate it when people link to TV tropes, because.... yeah ;-) I forget what I went there for.

 

[Brad Shepard]

my parents tried to give me the talk at 15... 15! god, i knew everything i needed to know at that time, im not stupid.

 

[Chechosaurus]

My most awkward talk would probably be as follows...
Mum: "Are you stoned?"
Me: "No..." (Blatantly stoned)
Mum: "Okay... Just stay away from super skunk. You want a cup of tea?"
Me: "Oh, tea would be excellent - Please say we have biscuits"

It was maybe not awkward just more... Bizarre.

 

[Soulkiller3]

My sep-dad accused me of being stoned and sead if he ever found out i did drugs he would kick me out. The funny thing is he did this first time ad been clean in over a year, so i could prove i was not doing drugs

 

[StarStruckStrumpets]

My dad trying to explain the brilliance of breasts and how nipples are sensitive.

I tried my hardest not to giggle. Seriously though, I don't get why everyone (especially guys) find them so awesome...

 

[RanD00M]

None.I have never had a awkward conversation with my parents.They're so open that I can talk to them about anything.
Like the fact that I watch porn.They know that.
The fact that I have never really gotten anywhere with a girl.They know that.
Ect ect ect.

 

[Bloodstain]

I don't have awkward ones, only stupid.

My mum is in the study room. My computer is there so I wonder if what she is doing involves moving around my stuff at all and the lights in the room are on. Now here comes the stupidity.

"Hey, mum, why are the lights on in here?"
"WHY? I"M NOT ALLOWED TO HAVE THE LIGHTS ON? YOU'RE SO ARROGANT"
"Asking why the lights are on is arrogant?"
"YES, YOU KNOW I'M CLEANING!"
"No I didn't, that's why I asked."

The end.

My mom's always like that. D:

This really happened on my 16th birthday:
My sister and my mom was in my room, when I was eating breakfast in bed. My sis was at my computer for once and opened my torrent client, seeing the porn I was downloading at the time.
She said something like "What's this?" with a vicious smile, and I was like "IT'S NOTHING" and my mother said "What? is it porn?"

After a moment of silence I said yes, and then she said "Thank god, Me and your father thought you might have been gay."

My sister almost laughed herself to death.

I like your sister, she's cool xD

Well, I had two awkward talks (awkward, I disregard the annoying ones here).
First one: I planned on going to Berlin, which is about 500km away, for about 2 weeks in order to visit some friends, including girls.
Boyfriend of my mother: "You now how babies are made, right? How sex works and how to prevent pregnancy?"
Me: "...I do."
He: "Okay then, prove it. Tell me."
Me: "..................condoms. Need to say more?"
He: "Okay, fine then."

Second one, after I returned from said trip:
My mother: "I don't know how close you are, but you did put on a condom if you had sex, right?"
Me: "..."
She: "No matter how you like her and her family, you sure don't want to have children wih her."
Me: "...honestly, do you think I'm stupid or something? -.-"

 

[yoyo13rom]

"Mom, dad, you know that I'm being all secret and stuff because I need privacy to masturbate, not to take drugs!"
I don't wish to explain further.

 

[Zersy]

Any conversation that is not about my grades or behaviour with my dad is awkward.

"What did you do today" (Awkward)
"Who is she ?" (Awkward)
"Are you Studying ?" (Not awkward)
"Where are you going ?" (Awkward)
"Do you love her ?" (Way Awkward)

It's best to just say Hello and hand over the remote and just get out before any further socilization can occur.

 

[MurderousToaster]

May I ask if this is in the wrong section? I don't precisely understand how this relates to gaming.

Whatever;

It's generally when my mother or father (or both) are drunk. My dad can talk about some weird stuff when he's under the influence of alcohol.

 

[Hookman]

My mums (now)ex-boyfriend had spent the night at our house. In the morning I got up and went downstairs to play Xbox. This room is directly underneath my mums bedroom. I remember that I was playing the final Thieves Guild mission on Elder Scrolls: Oblivion and halfway through I suddenly heard the ominous creaking of bedsprings from above my head. Dear lord it was frosty round the breakfast table that morning!

 

[Talshere]

Most of my awkward moments were actually practical jokes with me at the butt end.

Im, unusually, it seems, very close to my brother and sister as I'm so close to them both in age, 15 month younger and 18 months older respectively. As a result I'm usually pretty good friends with their friends. So things like, a strategically placed condom from one of my sisters friends designed to be found, when my brothers mate got me stoned and pissed for the first time.

Thankfully my parents have spent most of the time looking the other way on our various learning experiences and tactfully never bringing them up

Although I imagine my mum having to explain to my grandfather why he and my grandmother weren't allowed to move my bed when they were preping the house for sale must have been pretty spectacular. I believe they both bottled out when it actually came to telling my grandmother and just convinced her that they didnt have time to do everything