Need help with Romance? Who you gonna call?

[DigitalSushi]

Completely miss mine [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.122397?page=5#2474648], or is it one of those doozies (if I ever use that word again, shoot me...) that requires more thought?

As a quick update, I'm now officially levelling up a Warlock in WoW to help out her guild - apparently they don't have any that can raid properly. Along the way, I'm gonna get talking to her more and hope that I don't hit the friend zone. I'm calling it the "Knight in piss-poor armour" technique. I'll post results in six months when bugger all has changed.

Misanthropes don't normally get alot of action, but silver lining and all that, you like happy tree friends?, why don't you download it to your phone and show hot chics, its happy tree friends, it sounds cute so they'll love it.

Seriously though, say anything with confidence without sounding utterly retarded and you should get the girl, I once pulled a girl in Garlands by telling her she was cute like Pon and Zi, either i'm the master or she was fucking wasted.

 

[Satoz]

heres my question, I know I can go out with quite a few girls, though right now going to college next year means itd be rather pointless for now, but heres my problem, I dont know what to do on dates, im constantly afraid ill run out of ideas, money, etc and just fall into a repetitive schedule, any ideas on what I should do...I sorta feel repetition isnt too bad, but im just a little bugged by it, because its my main crippling factor, im not scared to talk to girls, or do stuff with them and just enjoy stuff, but I dont know why I feel that they will get bored

 

[DigitalSushi]

how long would you have to wait to date a girl who just came out of an relationship?

Note: I'm not a Vulture or anything I just found out when I when I was taking the first steps towards getting to know her/asking her out

Second note : Im quite a relaxed guy So it doesn't need to be the minimum just a indication of time

Edit: Wow I Seem to be the first serious post in ages O,O

I know, being all serious and stuff I was gonna be the first to welcome you to the internet.

Right, my serious question, does anyone know what sort of stuff German people like, I'm dating a German girl and she dodges questions, *****.

Also when we met she said "your French? you must be romantic", so I replied
"your German, so you must be reliable" made me giggle.

 

[DigitalSushi]

heres my question, I know I can go out with quite a few girls, though right now going to college next year means itd be rather pointless for now, but heres my problem, I dont know what to do on dates, im constantly afraid ill run out of ideas, money, etc and just fall into a repetitive schedule, any ideas on what I should do...I sorta feel repetition isnt too bad, but im just a little bugged by it, because its my main crippling factor, im not scared to talk to girls, or do stuff with them and just enjoy stuff, but I dont know why I feel that they will get bored

I always ask girls out to the movies, if I like the girl, Pixar movies never failed me.
You get to spend time with them without spending too much money and as a bonus, you don't have to talk to them for like 2 hours, after the film you have a common interest to chat about.

THE FILM.

 

[GamerPhate]

the best advice with woman is

Nod your head and say Yes Dear to what ever she says

(doesn't mean you have to be listening or anything.. )

 

[dwightsteel]

how long would you have to wait to date a girl who just came out of an relationship?

Note: I'm not a Vulture or anything I just found out when I when I was taking the first steps towards getting to know her/asking her out

Second note : Im quite a relaxed guy So it doesn't need to be the minimum just a indication of time

Edit: Wow I Seem to be the first serious post in ages O,O

Unless you're great friends with the person she was dating, then, like now. Right now even. She's on the rebound. Unless the breakup was really bad, and she was the one who got broken up with, then chances are, she's looking to play the field.

If she was the one who got dumped, and she's really torn up about it, I'd stay close as a friend and wait a little while, and in the mean time, warm her up to the idea of being with you.

 

[Kruxxor]

[. Girls should never approach guys, because that's just unnatural (and i'm old fashioned)

I'm sorry but this is bullshit... I am always impressed with a girl who has the guts to come up and chat a guy up, especially if she is funny and charming about it.

My missus was the one who came up and picked up on me in a bar and to this day I still think it was cool.

All I said was that I, personally, think guys should approach girls, because I think old-fashioned.

My girlfriend was the one who made the moves on me, not the other way around. I have no confidence and low self esteem.

 

[dwightsteel]

heres my question, I know I can go out with quite a few girls, though right now going to college next year means itd be rather pointless for now, but heres my problem, I dont know what to do on dates, im constantly afraid ill run out of ideas, money, etc and just fall into a repetitive schedule, any ideas on what I should do...I sorta feel repetition isnt too bad, but im just a little bugged by it, because its my main crippling factor, im not scared to talk to girls, or do stuff with them and just enjoy stuff, but I dont know why I feel that they will get bored

Ok, first and foremost, I'll tell you where you shouldn't go. Dinner dates, at least for first dates, are really not a good way to go. As I've said before, there are just too many details we tend to overlook that add to an already tense situation (very few people are completely comfortable on first dates. I've been on lots, and even I stiffen up a little on the first outing). Guys and girls alike tend to fret over proper attire for the occasion (is it a tie occasion, or are we going completely casual. What is she wearing?). Hell, even picking food can be...kind of touch and go (does she think having a healthy appetite is a good thing? how much is too much? is she holding back herself?). Not to mention the fact that it's a hell of an expense on you, with a person you may not end up seeing again. So yeah, avoid the dinner date on the first go around.

Movies: If you're afraid of getting to the talking points immediately, it's not a bad way to go, but remember, at one point or another, you're going to have to learn some tid-bits about each other. Besides, who gets to select the movie? Standard practice would dictate that she would, and no body wants to risk chilling for two hours at a movie they don't want to see. Dates are supposed to be enjoyable for both parties. Guys seem to forget that these days. And again, it's not necessarily the strongest monetary investment. You're looking to spend at least $20, and thats sans popcorn and beverages. If you do decide on a movie for the first go, going for drinks or coffee afterwards is probably a good way to go.

In the 21st century, Coffee dates are fantastic. They work well because they are adjustable (Coffee dates fit into any schedule. You can go at any time in the day), a lot of coffee shops work hard to present a calm, relaxing atmosphere, making it easier to just talk, and your expense is going to be minimal. In all the different types of dates I've been on, for first dates, coffee shops and cafes have yielded more success on more occasions.

Drinks aren't bad either, but they tend to be more expensive, and comfort levels around alcohol tend to vary. Just something to keep in mind.

 

[dwightsteel]

how long would you have to wait to date a girl who just came out of an relationship?

Note: I'm not a Vulture or anything I just found out when I when I was taking the first steps towards getting to know her/asking her out

Second note : Im quite a relaxed guy So it doesn't need to be the minimum just a indication of time

Edit: Wow I Seem to be the first serious post in ages O,O

I know, being all serious and stuff I was gonna be the first to welcome you to the internet.

Right, my serious question, does anyone know what sort of stuff German people like, I'm dating a German girl and she dodges questions, *****.

Also when we met she said "your French? you must be romantic", so I replied
"your German, so you must be reliable" made me giggle.

Personally, I tend to avoid territory specific endearments. I'd play it the same way I'd play it with a local girl. She'll open up to you eventually if she expects your relationship to go anywhere.

That being said, German girls are awesome. Oh, the stories I could tell.

 

[dwightsteel]

the best advice with woman is

Nod your head and say Yes Dear to what ever she says

(doesn't mean you have to be listening or anything.. )

.

Until she gets super pissed when she realizes you're not actually listening. So many guys try to give out this advice earnestly (and I'm not saying you are), and it's really a lot of crap. You think you'd notice when a girl is pretending to listen as opposed to actually listening? I know I would, and I wouldn't be too thrilled. If anything, females tend to be less receptive to that kind of treatment.

 

[IxionIndustries]

Well... This certainly is new. I'll give it a shot.

Spoiler

I've just turned 15 years old, and I'm going to be going into high school this fall, as a freshman (I think).

I'm in no real hurry to be in a relationship or anything, it just kinda gets me down when I think about all the other people who are getting ladies when they're freaking 12 years old!
I'm a little public shy, I don't really like to get out much. I'm geeky, meaning I like science classes, and despise any physical exertion of any kind. I'm thin and scrawny, and have no muscle what-so-ever.
I've never really been turned down before, or even asked anybody out before, so I have no clue what my reactions would be to that kind of situation.

Now for the minor details..
I have long hair, which I have trouble keeping under control, but have no intentions on cutting it anytime soon.
I also have quite an acne problem, stemming from my hair issues.
I'm not used to carrying on conversations.

Good lord, I've just spilled out most of my life's story.. Any enemies of mine could easily snag this information.. Best put spoiler tags on it!

 

[Bat Vader]

I quit looking for a girlfriend a year ago. I decided that being single is more of an ideal life for me, that and because I know that no woman will date me for being overweight and ugly.

 

[Bat Vader]

Well... This certainly is new. I'll give it a shot.

Spoiler

I've just turned 15 years old, and I'm going to be going into high school this fall, as a freshman (I think).

I'm in no real hurry to be in a relationship or anything, it just kinda gets me down when I think about all the other people who are getting ladies when they're freaking 12 years old!
I'm a little public shy, I don't really like to get out much. I'm geeky, meaning I like science classes, and despise any physical exertion of any kind. I'm thin and scrawny, and have no muscle what-so-ever.
I've never really been turned down before, or even asked anybody out before, so I have no clue what my reactions would be to that kind of situation.

Now for the minor details..
I have long hair, which I have trouble keeping under control, but have no intentions on cutting it anytime soon.
I also have quite an acne problem, stemming from my hair issues.
I'm not used to carrying on conversations.

Good lord, I've just spilled out most of my life's story.. Any enemies of mine could easily snag this information.. Best put spoiler tags on it!

That sounds like my life story as well. Except I am 21 and overweight.

 

[dwightsteel]

Well... This certainly is new. I'll give it a shot.

Spoiler

I've just turned 15 years old, and I'm going to be going into high school this fall, as a freshman (I think).

I'm in no real hurry to be in a relationship or anything, it just kinda gets me down when I think about all the other people who are getting ladies when they're freaking 12 years old!
I'm a little public shy, I don't really like to get out much. I'm geeky, meaning I like science classes, and despise any physical exertion of any kind. I'm thin and scrawny, and have no muscle what-so-ever.
I've never really been turned down before, or even asked anybody out before, so I have no clue what my reactions would be to that kind of situation.

Now for the minor details..
I have long hair, which I have trouble keeping under control, but have no intentions on cutting it anytime soon.
I also have quite an acne problem, stemming from my hair issues.
I'm not used to carrying on conversations.

Good lord, I've just spilled out most of my life's story.. Any enemies of mine could easily snag this information.. Best put spoiler tags on it!

Ok, while looks aren't aren't as important as some might lead you to believe, those "minor details", such as acne and out of control hair will never work in your favor. Girls like to know that you appreciate good grooming and hygiene. You don't have to cut your hair, but I wouldn't rule out making an appointment with a hair stylist. A decent stylist can shape your hair, and give you some good tips on caring for it (if you want to keep your hair long, it's a good idea to care for it properly). And talk to a dermatologist about your acne. That can last well into your 20's if you don't take care of it, and it is a big turn off for most girls.

All of your other problems just stem from lack of experience. You've never tried to ask a girl out, you've never been on a date, and thus you haven't had a chance to develop conversational skills. For this, I would turn to the first page on this thread. I put together a pretty comprehensive exercise for confidence and conversational skill building. If you stick to the exercise, you'll find yourself more at ease with the idea of approaching and eventually asking girls out.

As you've never been rejected before, know that it's going to happen. A lot it may seem, especially at first, but learning how to handle being rejected, and then pressing forward is something that you have to learn to get used to in order to progress your love life. All of this requires that you actually get out of the house and actually make an effort. It's not fun making progress, because it's never easy, and almost always out of your comfort zone, but nothing worth having ever is.

 

[dwightsteel]

I quit looking for a girlfriend a year ago. I decided that being single is more of an ideal life for me, that and because I know that no woman will date me for being overweight and ugly.

Dude, if that was the case, then I'd have never dated, never picked up a girl, and never gotten laid. I'm overweight myself. As I've said before, girls are less married to the idea of physical attraction then guys. If you expect them to think the way we do, you're going to be forever out of luck.

If being single is your cup of tea, then that's your prerogative, but if you're willing to put in some work at bettering your situation, then look at the exercise I've posted on the first page, practice it, live it, and ask the specific questions you have if you can't answer them yourself.

Don't give up if your only problem is that you don't give yourself enough credit.

 

[Bat Vader]

I quit looking for a girlfriend a year ago. I decided that being single is more of an ideal life for me, that and because I know that no woman will date me for being overweight and ugly.

Dude, if that was the case, then I'd have never dated, never picked up a girl, and never gotten laid. I'm overweight myself. As I've said before, girls are less married to the idea of physical attraction then guys. If you expect them to think the way we do, you're going to be forever out of luck.

If being single is your cup of tea, then that's your prerogative, but if you're willing to put in some work at bettering your situation, then look at the exercise I've posted on the first page, practice it, live it, and ask the specific questions you have if you can't answer them yourself.

Don't give up if your only problem is that you don't give yourself enough credit.

Being single is less difficult than trying to find a girlfriend. Plus with me going to college in the fall having a girlfriend would just complicate matters as well. Sex was never a big deal to me. Having a loving relationship is more important. That is my opinion.

It is good what you are doing. Trying to help people. Some people just can't be helped.

 

[dwightsteel]

I quit looking for a girlfriend a year ago. I decided that being single is more of an ideal life for me, that and because I know that no woman will date me for being overweight and ugly.

Dude, if that was the case, then I'd have never dated, never picked up a girl, and never gotten laid. I'm overweight myself. As I've said before, girls are less married to the idea of physical attraction then guys. If you expect them to think the way we do, you're going to be forever out of luck.

If being single is your cup of tea, then that's your prerogative, but if you're willing to put in some work at bettering your situation, then look at the exercise I've posted on the first page, practice it, live it, and ask the specific questions you have if you can't answer them yourself.

Don't give up if your only problem is that you don't give yourself enough credit.

Being single is less difficult than trying to find a girlfriend. Plus with me going to college in the fall having a girlfriend would just complicate matters as well. Sex was never a big deal to me. Having a loving relationship is more important. That is my opinion.

It is good what you are doing. Trying to help people. Some people just can't be helped.

I honestly don't believe that, but I won't pry. Know that I'm here to help if you need it.

 

[Bat Vader]

I quit looking for a girlfriend a year ago. I decided that being single is more of an ideal life for me, that and because I know that no woman will date me for being overweight and ugly.

Dude, if that was the case, then I'd have never dated, never picked up a girl, and never gotten laid. I'm overweight myself. As I've said before, girls are less married to the idea of physical attraction then guys. If you expect them to think the way we do, you're going to be forever out of luck.

If being single is your cup of tea, then that's your prerogative, but if you're willing to put in some work at bettering your situation, then look at the exercise I've posted on the first page, practice it, live it, and ask the specific questions you have if you can't answer them yourself.

Don't give up if your only problem is that you don't give yourself enough credit.

Being single is less difficult than trying to find a girlfriend. Plus with me going to college in the fall having a girlfriend would just complicate matters as well. Sex was never a big deal to me. Having a loving relationship is more important. That is my opinion.

It is good what you are doing. Trying to help people. Some people just can't be helped.

I honestly don't believe that, but I won't pry. Know that I'm here to help if you need it.

Don't believe what? My opinion or how having a girlfriend would complicate my education?