On Women As People and How To Get Their Attention

[Froggyman1000]

Men and women are the same when it comes to the most important thing they are looking for. That is a presentable physical appearance. If you disgust a woman physically, you have absolute zero chances with her, not even if you have 2 Nobel prizes and an IQ of 300. She might be very excited to hear what you have to say on certain things, but that's all. The end. Period. If you look horrible but you can improve it, try to. Consciously. If there's nothing you can do about it, you're basically screwed and need to realize it as soon as possible and look for other things in life that you find fulfilling and channel your energy elsewhere. Preferably on something creative or something you are talented at. Know that you will be sexually alone, but that doesn't mean that you can't have a bunch of great friends or that you are worthless. You are just a victim of the leftover of natural selection that favors the more virile looking, because back then people had to hunt, kill and eat stuff or die. But in the end, that can prove to be not such a bad thing, because the highest forms of art and creativity are fueled by the creator's own personal misery.

Sorry for the shot of reality.

Wow...I didn't know we were all so easy to understand. So many people just like to chuck things out there, it's hilarious. To you, Carnagath, really quickly before I go on my rant, I'm ugly as sin, and I have a beautiful and loving girlfriend. Point disproved.

You can rationalize, group together, and judge women, or any other living organism all you'd like, but the truth of the matter is that every single one of them is going to be different. Oh sure, some of them might fit into the same pattern, some of them may act or think alike, but no two things are exactly the same, ever, and for anyone to try to go around speaking as if there's some masterful way to know exactly what someone is thinking all the time based on their sex, there isn't.

Humans..ALL humans, are complex creatures. We want different things at different times, for little to no reason at all. We just want them. The same woman you find hideous I could find drop dead sexy, and the opposite is true. Mere looks are bunk. Idealistic styles and fads exist, sure, but there are loads of people who don't buy into any of that junk. And it is junk, I'm sorry. Reality check, if you're not dating someone because they don't look a certain way you want them to look, you're about as deep as a mountain. (hint, mountains jet upwards, not good)

And to those who think women need men with stable..whatever, sure. Again, SOME women want men to have a job, and lots of money, and taken care of, but some women do not care. They'd be happy with getting smothered with emotional love, and have to pay the bills, it doesn't bother some people. If men can want to take care of someone, so can a woman. It's really not that different.

Love is different for everyone, because every single person is different. It's IMPOSSIBLE to understand women as a group, just like it would be to understand men as a group. A group of women or men may act similar, but no two are the same, ever. My point is if you really want to understand someone, you have to get to know them, and learn how they behave and what they want from a relationship by discovery. Be who you are, and let them be who they wish to be. If you two connect, great. If you don't, there's plenty of other people out there to meet.

A couple of quick closing notes. For either sex, to assume your want for something is a standard, because you and a gaggle of friends like the same thing, makes you an ass, as do all assumptions. I don't care if you know five billion men who like big breasts, or ten quadrillion women who need a man with financial stability, there will always be someone who could give less than two cents about any of that, and they aren't nearly as rare as you'd like to believe. To change yourself, in any way, for anyone, is wrong. I fully understand every single woman I've ever taken the time and effort to get to know, they are ALL different, just like everyone else.

 

[Arrers]

Eh. People of all genders like to generalise to help cover up their own insecurities. I don't let it worry me because eventually anyone who goes along applying bizarre stereotypes and generalisations to real life gets bitten in the ass, and they have to re think.

This. You can't generalise individuals, it just doesn't work.

 

[Bluebacon]

People follow archetypes. Stereotypes are merely simplified and broad archetypes easily accessible to the average person. The politically correct crowd has brain washed people into thinking stereotype is an evil word.

Just like they try to convince us we are all completely equal...which means we are the same. But they also say we are all unique. We cannot have it both ways, either we are the same or different, right?

Women want pretty predictable things. They want a rich man who will improve their quality of life and put her first emotionally. I get tired of hearing women deny it...but what woman is brave enough to come forward and say she looks for jobless, penniless, and dependent men because she doesn't care about money and going out and about?

How sad.

 

[asinann]

I know how to land a woman, already have one.
Women only want what's already taken.

 

[Hot'n'steamy]

Just don't smell and be nice to us. We're similar to girls in many aspects, I don't get what the big deal is.

 

[Arrers]

This explains, as well as being a good lesson on dating, the incongruence between the mentality of sexes.

I.E: I wanted to post it, and it's relevant here.

What site is that from?

 

[Arrers]

This explains, as well as being a good lesson on dating, the incongruence between the mentality of sexes.

I.E: I wanted to post it, and it's relevant here.

What site is that from?

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/friends.png - xkcd

Thanks. And I have to say, your reply to my first post on my this topic was a great argument.

 

[SenseOfTumour]

I'd have to say the looks thing would be right to an extent, if there's no physical attraction at all, then it's not going to happen, but you can't say its the most important thing, its like the wheels and engine of a car, without both its bloody useless, so you can't really say one is more important.

My view on physical attractiveness is that no-one is more attractive than anyone else, just that some people are attractive to more people than others, and I think we all have a chance at finding a partner, just that some people have better chances than others.

There's certain things you'll want a minimum of before you choose a life partner I think, casual relationships are different.

For me I'd need some attraction to her, her to have some income and self sufficiency, and to have some intelligence and social skills. An interest in gaming would be nice, but I'm sure we could find other things in common.

As for those questionnaires to find your ideal partner, can anyone explain why sense of humour usually comes out as number one, yet I have many female friends who love being around me and enjoy my company, but are busy nailing a rich ,good looking asshole with pecs and a nice car? Oh hang on, I just answered my own question I think. Because one thing doesn't make up for all the others

I STILL don't understand why women choose to stay with assholes tho, and why 'nice guys' are considered boring or weak.

 

[matnatz]

women don't have a penis

*Shock* Then how do they write their name in the snow?

 

[Sparrow]

I mean, not all of your male friends want the same thing out of a relationship, right? (Unless you live in a Judd Apatow movie and all you care about is getting laid regularly)

Who is this man? Is he writing my biography or something? (Oh yes, I went there)

Your seriously forgetting one point. The average male gamer is that of a sexless, 30 something geek. It's a dumb stereotype, but to a certain extent it's true. These "women" are simply in their imagination.

 

[Simriel]

I was actually reading through them (joined shortly after), and I found it really interesting how so many men can wonder about the conundrum of our existence.

(fake irish accent) A GURL! ON THE INTERWEBZ! SHE CANT BE REAL!!!! /joke
But seriously There are 4000000000000000 threads every week about what women want and how to get women. And at times the ones giving advice are the same ones who made threads ASKING for it. Its a fact of Interwebz forums. Guys with no idea, ask other guys with no idea, how to get gurls.

 

[ExaltedK9]

Eh. People of all genders like to generalise to help cover up their own insecurities. I don't let it worry me because eventually anyone who goes along applying bizarre stereotypes and generalisations to real life gets bitten in the ass, and they have to re think.

I don't quite get that, if every moron learned their lesson, and changed their ways the first time they slipped up well...we would at least see a considerable decrease in the localized retard population. but, such is not the case, and we all are still knee-deep in stereo-types and generalizations.


All...erm, Most people are different, varying individuals, with different thoughts and beleifs. i think women as a whole are complex and mysterious though, but all of them still individuals.

please dont kill me...

 

[grayishfox]

how about stop obsessing over it? just treat the opposite sex like any other person really and eventually you will stumble into someone who will like you. quit being so impatient and whining at how unlucky you are...

 

[Agayek]

To be honest, I'm a little frustrated with the "what do women want" threads. Women are a varied and diverse group of people, same as men. I mean, not all of your male friends want the same thing out of a relationship, right? (Unless you live in a Judd Apatow movie and all you care about is getting laid regularly)

So why on earth do a significant number of men on the forum constantly act as though there is one Woman, who is mysterious, ever-changing, and weirder than an alien?

It's sort of like-- do you expect every gamer to want the same sort of game? Do you think that there is one platonic ideal of The Gamer and get annoyed that real gamers have a bunch of different opinions?

Because no straight man will ever be able to understand the thought processes of women.

The physical differences in brain chemistry and structure just make them alien. Thus men will always be baffled by women.

 

[Fingerprint]

The forums seem to go through phases. There was the "homosexual" threads, the "religious" threads and at the moment there are the "women" threads. (Of course there are the standard dozen or so "guns", "genre", "music", etc., etc. threads that are continuous.) Don't worry everyone will talk about something new in a week or two.

On topic: Everyone's different, everyone's weird (and have weird thoughts/ideas) so there's no need to think too much on it.