I'm usually just really friendly up until I realize that the other person is actually attracted to me.
Then I panic.
Then I panic.
Poll: How do you flirt?
- Thread starter MasterOfWorlds
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Honestly, I don't flirt at all in a traditional sense. I don't chat people up, I just talk to them and see if our personalities spark.
There's certain stock conversations that I run to see if someone is the kind of person I would be interested in. If they can get through to the end of about ten minutes of conversation, enjoying my sense of humour and being interesting back, then tbh I'm about done. I'll just be charming a while longer and then take their knickers off in my own good time.
Lead with a compliment, find out more about them, take an interest in whatever they talk about(that's a learned skill btw... show a little knowledge, but let them teach you too... it makes people trust you and makes them feel smart... it gets them talking comfortably and feeling good about themselves), make clever jokes about things. If you do it right, they'll tell you anything in their life and feel like they've known you forever very quickly. From there, if I genuinely like them, then I'm set. Arrange to see them again or sex them up a couple of hours later, depending on the vibe I get from them. Some people like to jump right in, some people like to connect more, either way is fine.
It sounds kinda arrogant, but I promise its not meant to sound like that. I can definitely NOT sleep with anyone. But if they are the kind of person I like (clever, funny, under-appreciated which is normally bundled with some self-esteem/daddy issues) then they are likely to be the kind of person that would sleep with me (clever, funny, hard to please, slightly domineering male).
Its all about choosing the right people to talk to. If you are compatible, you won't 'flirt' at all, just sit and enjoy talking. I think thats what most people forget not just with flirting but with meeting people in general. They only go after impossible gorgeous air-headed attention whores and are then complain they never manage to talk them into bed.
Now sure you have to see some kind of sexy in someone to wanna sex them up, but tbh almost everyone has that in them and it becomes a lot clearer when you talk to them. Personally I think everyone is pretty when they smile, and it doesn't matter about size or lack of it. If you see someone who you think just has a something that gets your attention, go tell them you think so. Make them smile and talk to them and see whats to do. Being open minded to anyone means you'll be a whole lot happier IMHO, you look at the world differently.
There's certain stock conversations that I run to see if someone is the kind of person I would be interested in. If they can get through to the end of about ten minutes of conversation, enjoying my sense of humour and being interesting back, then tbh I'm about done. I'll just be charming a while longer and then take their knickers off in my own good time.
Lead with a compliment, find out more about them, take an interest in whatever they talk about(that's a learned skill btw... show a little knowledge, but let them teach you too... it makes people trust you and makes them feel smart... it gets them talking comfortably and feeling good about themselves), make clever jokes about things. If you do it right, they'll tell you anything in their life and feel like they've known you forever very quickly. From there, if I genuinely like them, then I'm set. Arrange to see them again or sex them up a couple of hours later, depending on the vibe I get from them. Some people like to jump right in, some people like to connect more, either way is fine.
It sounds kinda arrogant, but I promise its not meant to sound like that. I can definitely NOT sleep with anyone. But if they are the kind of person I like (clever, funny, under-appreciated which is normally bundled with some self-esteem/daddy issues) then they are likely to be the kind of person that would sleep with me (clever, funny, hard to please, slightly domineering male).
Its all about choosing the right people to talk to. If you are compatible, you won't 'flirt' at all, just sit and enjoy talking. I think thats what most people forget not just with flirting but with meeting people in general. They only go after impossible gorgeous air-headed attention whores and are then complain they never manage to talk them into bed.
Now sure you have to see some kind of sexy in someone to wanna sex them up, but tbh almost everyone has that in them and it becomes a lot clearer when you talk to them. Personally I think everyone is pretty when they smile, and it doesn't matter about size or lack of it. If you see someone who you think just has a something that gets your attention, go tell them you think so. Make them smile and talk to them and see whats to do. Being open minded to anyone means you'll be a whole lot happier IMHO, you look at the world differently.
I've been told I'm very good at it. I was once asked how it was possible for me to be single once. My problem is that I don't flirt with anyone I don't know, so I just flirt with friends or people I know without any intentions of accomplishing anything. That is mostly because I hate it when strangers hit on me so I don't want to do something that makes me feel uncomfortable to someone else.
All these answers look the same. "Angh, idk about flirting, I can't do it, it's dumb".
I flirt with INTENSITY. The confidence level fluctuates, but I give it my best.
The confidence usually pays off and I can at least know that I tried.
That being said, you only flirt with the ones WORTH flirting with. Aiming too high or too low will wreck your confidence and self-esteem so judge wisely.
I flirt with INTENSITY. The confidence level fluctuates, but I give it my best.
The confidence usually pays off and I can at least know that I tried.
That being said, you only flirt with the ones WORTH flirting with. Aiming too high or too low will wreck your confidence and self-esteem so judge wisely.
I'm pretty damn shy, so I usually wait for the stars to align in the symbol of a male penis.
But I think I may have gotten better at it. Acting bored and casual very nearly got me laid for the first time this past Friday. Only problem was the girl's friend had a huge crush on me and at one point literally backed me into a corner so I couldn't face said girl.
I'm not to fond of being an asshole, so I had to kinda grind my teeth and bare through it.
But yeah, I've come to the rather sad realization that it is just about physically impossible to strike up conversation with a random stranger who has no prior connections to me in any way. Which sucks, because I'm not that bad looking.
But I think I may have gotten better at it. Acting bored and casual very nearly got me laid for the first time this past Friday. Only problem was the girl's friend had a huge crush on me and at one point literally backed me into a corner so I couldn't face said girl.
I'm not to fond of being an asshole, so I had to kinda grind my teeth and bare through it.
But yeah, I've come to the rather sad realization that it is just about physically impossible to strike up conversation with a random stranger who has no prior connections to me in any way. Which sucks, because I'm not that bad looking.
I'm not too good at social interaction in general.
But if I like a woman, I'd try to start a conversation about animals, more importantly invertebrates.
If she goes "Icky!", there's no future for the relationship, if she's interested, I can dazzle her with my arachnid-collection.
But if I like a woman, I'd try to start a conversation about animals, more importantly invertebrates.
If she goes "Icky!", there's no future for the relationship, if she's interested, I can dazzle her with my arachnid-collection.
I guess I'm a natural but subtle flirt. It's mostly me just being playful. I only once used flirting to get a girl and it totally worked. I just go all over the place in a conversation. Hobbies, interests, some innuendo's here and there and saying I made one very unsubtly, calling me out on my own bad humour.
Whenever they say something bad about themselves I'll deny it in someway or another. Try to get them in touch with their shy side. Help them get to say things that'll make me shy or act it out a little. Confidence goes a long way but a sweet little bit of shyness has its uses!
I also try to get a good entry point. Like once I was talking to this girl in a group and she was sad because she couldnt attend a party before most of her friends would be gone so I said how a party is always awesome when I'm there and promised I'd stick around so she would still have a great time.
This little escapade resulted in a 2 year relationship. But now I need to get back into the game and I have yet to find interesting targets. But I still flirt a little with every girl whether they're taken or not. It's just my wya of smooth talking I guess
Whenever they say something bad about themselves I'll deny it in someway or another. Try to get them in touch with their shy side. Help them get to say things that'll make me shy or act it out a little. Confidence goes a long way but a sweet little bit of shyness has its uses!
I also try to get a good entry point. Like once I was talking to this girl in a group and she was sad because she couldnt attend a party before most of her friends would be gone so I said how a party is always awesome when I'm there and promised I'd stick around so she would still have a great time.
This little escapade resulted in a 2 year relationship. But now I need to get back into the game and I have yet to find interesting targets. But I still flirt a little with every girl whether they're taken or not. It's just my wya of smooth talking I guess
Flirting is not one of my strengths. I find I am to... secluded to get used to the social patterns of the natural young human. Thus is why I gave up on trying to find a lover; there really is no use in trying when it comes to me, and most people ignore me anyways, so im used to it.
I'm really rubbish at flirting, because i just talk to girls like their ordinary people. I'm not very good at getting the compliments in a conversation and i'm not very playful and humourous, unless the girl in question is naturally playful. I do have a funny side to me, but that only comes out in the company of close friends, certainly not with random acquaintances. Plus, i'm picky as well which may not help.
I'm not really that shy, but nor am i very outgoing either. If i could build up enough rapport with a girl i liked i would ask her out, but i have not got to that stage in recent years.
I'm not really that shy, but nor am i very outgoing either. If i could build up enough rapport with a girl i liked i would ask her out, but i have not got to that stage in recent years.
Actually, i'm fairly sure that's normal. It's only very confident people whom can do that, or very lucky people whereby some external circumstance causes two strangers to start talking.Tdc2182 said:
I've stopped trying. No woman would ever want such an abomination, it seems rude to ruin someone's day by talking to them.
Besides, even if I did manage to start flirting with someone, I've more chance of deciphering a lovecraftian book written in an ancient language supposedly inconceivable to the human Tongue and mind than I have of deciphering the numerous unwritten rules, subtle hints, and riddles governing whether I got a good response and what the hell I do next.
Basically, for me, it's all a massive waste of time and mental energy.
Besides, even if I did manage to start flirting with someone, I've more chance of deciphering a lovecraftian book written in an ancient language supposedly inconceivable to the human Tongue and mind than I have of deciphering the numerous unwritten rules, subtle hints, and riddles governing whether I got a good response and what the hell I do next.
Basically, for me, it's all a massive waste of time and mental energy.
I'm actually quite good at flirting but I have come to the conclusion that any man I am vaguely attracted to, god or (insert omnipotent being here), puts a 'you only like that girl as a friend' chip in thier head and then laughs, eating popcorn, while I humiliate myself.
Oh and I'm usually utterly clueless if if a guy actually DOES likes me and if he does I think there must be something wrong with him and I'm usually not attracted to them in any way.
Conclusion: The universe hates me.
ps: I have tried to PRETEND I like the guys who fancy me out of pure resignation to my fate but tbh the last one I tried that with was an abusive dick and now I have PTSD. Did I mention the universe hates me.
There's also the geek girl factor, in which men act attracted to me becuase 'lol she likes computer games!' Then they actually realise that I am in fact a REAL geek and brozone me faster than Isaac Clarke did with his mad hallucinations. Please stop that.
Sigh.
Oh and I'm usually utterly clueless if if a guy actually DOES likes me and if he does I think there must be something wrong with him and I'm usually not attracted to them in any way.
Conclusion: The universe hates me.
ps: I have tried to PRETEND I like the guys who fancy me out of pure resignation to my fate but tbh the last one I tried that with was an abusive dick and now I have PTSD. Did I mention the universe hates me.
There's also the geek girl factor, in which men act attracted to me becuase 'lol she likes computer games!' Then they actually realise that I am in fact a REAL geek and brozone me faster than Isaac Clarke did with his mad hallucinations. Please stop that.
Sigh.
I don't.
To be honest though, I haven't really ever tried flirting in a serious manner. If I would though it would probably revolve around sexual innuendos and double entendres although I'd start the conversation with humor and the like before flirting openly.
To be honest though, I haven't really ever tried flirting in a serious manner. If I would though it would probably revolve around sexual innuendos and double entendres although I'd start the conversation with humor and the like before flirting openly.
Badly. Luckily, my awkward weirdness has it's out kind of earnest charm. Like a puppy trying desperately to catch his own tail. Or so I've been told.
Last time I did it it just kinda happened naturally. Me and my driving instructor grabbed a cup of coffee while he was filling up the car, and there was this really cute girl behind the counter. So while she prepared coffee, fumbling and giggeling, I just sorta...flirted with her, I guess. It was good.