Poll: If Your Significant Other Cheated, Would You Help Raise The Baby

[crudus]

Ok, let me preface this with the fact that I have a few good friends who got pregnant in high school. I helped them anyway I could whether it was financially, emotionally, physically, etc. I am even a godfather. Now, if my girlfriend/wife person cheated and got pregnant on me I would tell them I hoped she lived forever and never contact with them again. I don't even give the time of day to the people I can't trust, and I can't trust her after that.

I voted "Female, no matter what".

Honestly, it depends on how sorry he was he cheated though. If he was honestly repentant on cheating, I'd help raise the baby. It's not the kid's fault the father's an ass, and he/she shouldn't be blamed. It needs a mom.

Ok, may I ask the scenario you are imagining. Since I am male I am imagining she gets pregnant which doesn't work if the guy cheats. Unless the mother just runs off.

Wheres the 'get rid of the baby' option?

I found it!

Spoiler

That really should be an option in the poll.

No it shouldn't. This is one of the few serious threads on the escapist. They are rare, so you can deal with it.

 

[bojac6]

Wow you bunch are an uncaring, unforgiving lot. They aren't asking if the girl you've been seeing a few months cheats on you, they're asking about your significant other. Someone that you've committed to and have presumably promised to spend the rest of your life with. A person you (hypothetically) claim to love and care about deeply made a huge mistake, and your responses are things like:

I'd not only leave, I'd probably pull a lion move and eat the little bastard (for once this is meant literally)

Or maybe I'd just throw it in a trash can.

and

Leave and lol as her life crumbles around her.

Really?
I still keep in contact with most of my exes. I still care about them and help them out, because they were worth dating, they are people I felt a strong connection with, so why does that change when we decide to stop being romantically involved. Now I've had some big falling outs with some of them, but for the most part, it's been amicable, despite being temporarily heartbreaking.

I think it would be a far worse thing for me to leave her alone and pregnant than the fact that she cheated. I think family and children are important, and that doesn't mean condemning cheaters for moments of weakness, that means forgiving the people we love. I'm not talking about letting your significant other walk all over you and cheat over and over again, but a one time transgression that blew up on them? Yeah, what kind of a heartless bastard wouldn't forgive?

 

[hazabaza1]

Nope. I'd go tell her to ask the father for help, not because I wouldn't want to help raise the baby (even though I wouldn't) but just because she'd cheated on me.

 

[DC_Josh]

Wow you bunch are an uncaring, unforgiving lot. They aren't asking if the girl you've been seeing a few months cheats on you, they're asking about your significant other. Someone that you've committed to and have presumably promised to spend the rest of your life with. A person you (hypothetically) claim to love and care about deeply made a huge mistake, and your responses are things like:

I'd not only leave, I'd probably pull a lion move and eat the little bastard (for once this is meant literally)

Or maybe I'd just throw it in a trash can.

and

Leave and lol as her life crumbles around her.

Really?
I still keep in contact with most of my exes. I still care about them and help them out, because they were worth dating, they are people I felt a strong connection with, so why does that change when we decide to stop being romantically involved. Now I've had some big falling outs with some of them, but for the most part, it's been amicable, despite being temporarily heartbreaking.

I think it would be a far worse thing for me to leave her alone and pregnant than the fact that she cheated. I think family and children are important, and that doesn't mean condemning cheaters for moments of weakness, that means forgiving the people we love. I'm not talking about letting your significant other walk all over you and cheat over and over again, but a one time transgression that blew up on them? Yeah, what kind of a heartless bastard wouldn't forgive?

This.

Some people are obviously clueless enough about love to think that such an event could so severely damage the love you shared. If it were me, I would endeavour to find out why and how she cheated and then give her the choice- she does it again, i'd leave her, otherwise she gets a second chance. A child becomes yours in the raising, not in the contraception.

You can bet the real father ain't having nout to do with her until she's 16 though.

 

[Vanguard_Ex]

It would hurt me like hell, but I'd leave. For one thing she'd have ruined my fucking trust in the worst way possible, but even if I stayed I would forever be reminded of it whenever I looked at that child. She made her bed and she can sleep in it.

Some people are obviously clueless enough about love to think that such an event could so severely damage the love you shared. If it were me, I would endeavour to find out why and how she cheated and then give her the choice- she does it again, i'd leave her, otherwise she gets a second chance. A child becomes yours in the raising, not in the contraception.

You can bet the real father ain't having nout to do with her until she's 16 though.

How can you be clueless about love? Love is subjective to each person and means something different to everyone.

 

[The DSM]

It depends.

If im married Id stay as divorce is too expensive, and the men will always lose money on divorcing if a child is involved.

If I wasnt I might stay depending on how sorry they where, if they didnt care they cheated, I dont care about the result of them not caring.

 

[akiata]

There should have been an either gender can't live with someone who isn't trustworthy. I wouldn't mind the kid, it's like adopting. I just couldn't stand the woman anymore.

 

[Captain Pirate]

I would leave. My girlfriend/wife obviously didn't care enough about me to prevent her from cheating. Why would I care about another man's child? His responsibility now.

Summed my response up perfectly. It's the *****'s kid, if she considers the other man worth cheating on me for, she should consider him worth raising her kid. If it doesn't work out well for them, well, entirely their fault and problem.

 

[Cheery Lunatic]

I voted "Female, no matter what".

Honestly, it depends on how sorry he was he cheated though. If he was honestly repentant on cheating, I'd help raise the baby. It's not the kid's fault the father's an ass, and he/she shouldn't be blamed. It needs a mom.

Ok, may I ask the scenario you are imagining. Since I am male I am imagining she gets pregnant which doesn't work if the guy cheats. Unless the mother just runs off.

Yep. That or the mother dies.

 

[JSDodd]

I think it depends on the circumstances, if it was a one off and she got pregnant but wanted to get rid of the baby i'd probably be ok with it. If she wanted to KEEP the damned thing i would be out of there so fast i'd be leaving speed lines

 

[BoosterGold]

I'm a guy and also a complete idiot because I know this is a terrible thing to do to myself.
I would stay if the biological father never had any thing to do with the child other then money, (and the child look white or Indian making it easy to lie our families and for me to lie to myself).
Honestly I don't think I could leave my girlfriend especially if she was having a baby, mine or not. Plus I wanted to adopt a baby anyway if I squint real hard its the same thing

 

[Xojins]

I'd probably leave; I wouldn't want a child around and have to take care of it as one of my own (since it isn't). I wouldn't be able to give it the same love and care as a child that's biologically mine.

 

[Chancie]

I'm female and I'd leave. Cheating is the worst thing I think you can do to another person, and if my special someone cheated on me, I'd leave him no matter what or how much I loved him, and especially if he got the other woman pregnant.

 

[DocBalance]

I'm a dude, and I voted stay. I may be an asshole, but the kid didn't do anything. Might as well give him/her a proper life.

 

[Doctor Glocktor]

I'd leave, Roadrunner vs Wile E. Coyote fast. I won't be used to make up for HER mistake.

 

[Wrds]

It's not in me to turn away those that have need to rely on me. Even if I could never again trust my significant other, I would help raise the child, possibly adopt it based on how the real father acts.

 

[Spinozaad]

I'm a male and leave.

It's not my child. It's not my responsibility. Simple as that. If the biological father has a 'fuck that!' moment as well, I'd say it's her problem all alone.

She betrayed me and our relation by screwing behind my back. Forgiveness is one thing, one thing I would care little about in this case.