Whole thread tl;dr but judging from the comments of posters on the first couple of pages all of the people who posted that it isn't sexist are incredibly sexist, so I would take their opinions with a Utah-sized pinch of salt.
Poll: Is this sexist?
- Thread starter TheLefty
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Sexist? It might well have been interpreted as such. Hell, if I was a girl, I would.
So tactful? Not in the slightest.
And you know, the entire thing about this chivalry business is that it requires tact.
Most of all though, it's plain stupid.
Brushing away a chance to spend time in the dark, with all the perfect excuses to jump and grab someone, with 3 girls?
BECAUSE THEY'RE GIRLS?
Have yourself checked
(With the original subject of this thread in mind, that was obviously meant in jest)
So tactful? Not in the slightest.
And you know, the entire thing about this chivalry business is that it requires tact.
Most of all though, it's plain stupid.
Brushing away a chance to spend time in the dark, with all the perfect excuses to jump and grab someone, with 3 girls?
BECAUSE THEY'RE GIRLS?
Have yourself checked
(With the original subject of this thread in mind, that was obviously meant in jest
)
The statement isn't sexist in itself. He doesn't explicitly say that it's because they are girls. However, most people are going to assume that was implied by the way he said it.
So technically no, not sexist, but you would have a hard time convincing some of people.
So technically no, not sexist, but you would have a hard time convincing some of people.
Not sexist as you didn't intend it to be. Just poor choice of words.
Give each one a nice apology saying what a stupid thing to say it was on your part and that you admire them much more than any guy, show them how big your balls are. Not many guys have the balls to go and say sorry like that.
You might impress them *nudge* *wink*
Give each one a nice apology saying what a stupid thing to say it was on your part and that you admire them much more than any guy, show them how big your balls are. Not many guys have the balls to go and say sorry like that.
You might impress them *nudge* *wink*
I think saying "I'm not letting a bunch of girls pay my admission" comes across badly.
I mean, I would bet you many men who use the Escapist, if they offered to pay for a woman's meal and she said "I'm not letting a man pay for my meal", they'd think something along the lines of "What the fuck is your problem with men?" and start a forum debate about crazy feminists who hate men.
I mean, I would bet you many men who use the Escapist, if they offered to pay for a woman's meal and she said "I'm not letting a man pay for my meal", they'd think something along the lines of "What the fuck is your problem with men?" and start a forum debate about crazy feminists who hate men.
I still maintain that in most cases, what is sexist and racist, isn't the language but the intent.
However if it is taken that way, it's hard to argue as you've caused offence even tho none was meant, and it's probably easier to swallow your pride, explain what you meant, but that you phrased it badly, and get back to being friends without stress hanging over you.
Note by the above I mean, two friends can call each other ****** and cracker while gaming and obviously neither is going to get offended, they know there's no hate meant, it's just using offensive words for laughs, whereas shouting it across the street at someone you don't even know, that's obviously a bad thing.
I also appreciate that the escapist doesn't have a blanket ban on words, as sometimes it's nice to be able to discuss things without having to pretend they don't exist and having to say 'the n word' or 'the c word' (in terms of swearing).
However if it is taken that way, it's hard to argue as you've caused offence even tho none was meant, and it's probably easier to swallow your pride, explain what you meant, but that you phrased it badly, and get back to being friends without stress hanging over you.
Note by the above I mean, two friends can call each other ****** and cracker while gaming and obviously neither is going to get offended, they know there's no hate meant, it's just using offensive words for laughs, whereas shouting it across the street at someone you don't even know, that's obviously a bad thing.
I also appreciate that the escapist doesn't have a blanket ban on words, as sometimes it's nice to be able to discuss things without having to pretend they don't exist and having to say 'the n word' or 'the c word' (in terms of swearing).
It was in a way, just from the words. However, that was probably a Freudian slip anyway or something like that. Generally, you should have been much more tactful and simply explained to them right off the bat that you wanted to be the gentleman and pay yourself. Then it would have been a different, and probably happier, story. As it happens, it was a little bit sexist, but that said it was simply a genuine mistake.
Nah, it's not sexist. If you said something like 'I'm not going to let a bunch of girls pay for me' in a voice that suggested they aren't good enough to pay for you, that would be sexist.
Chivalry is fine 2 an extent but gotta play the treat everyone equal on this one if it was guy friends you would probably have been more inclined to agree.
A lot of chivalrous things are now seen as being sexist, so even had you not said it in the heat of an argument it might have come across that way. Holding a door open for a woman is often seen as being sexist in implying that she can't get it herself (never mind that it might just be good manners to hold doors open for people).
Then there's the phrasing, which is sexist.
But hey, you said it in an argument and almost nothing said in an argument will be a reasonable statement. As long as you don't go around making a habit of it, you aren't sexist, so don't worry.
Then there's the phrasing, which is sexist.
But hey, you said it in an argument and almost nothing said in an argument will be a reasonable statement. As long as you don't go around making a habit of it, you aren't sexist, so don't worry.
While that is undoubtedly true, I'd say the offense is justified in this case.Wakefield said:
OP: why not just tell them you're sorry? Admit you were an ass, tell them you won't be doing it again, and don't do it again.