Poll: Puns

[Escapefromwhatever]

What type of cheese isn't yours?

Nacho cheese!

 

[oppp7]

This thread sucks(pun intended).

OT: Hate them. I hate them all.

 

[deleted_scifidownbeat]

DELETED

 

[Saargston]

Even though I make them all the time, I don't like puns all that much. I guess it's an easy mispun[derstanding to make. I really only use them as weapons, but I'd be lying if I said that they hadn't groan on me over time. The trouble is that they have a very chortle life span. Once you use one once, it loses it's fluster, at least to that particular crowd. It might a-paranomasia to hear this, but they really floor me. After I hear a really bad one, I get all joked up. Hell, I can't even stand up

 

[Troublesome Lagomorph]

Depends.
If it's funny I'll like it.
If it's lame I may chuckle but then get very srs.

 

[Hashime]

I use puns to PUNish my friends. They do not find them punny, but I enjoy their pain.

 

[Snarky Username]

Have you ever gone camping?

I hear that its intents.

"..."​

...Moving on, some puns are pretty PUNny, others... not so much. It entirely depends on the subject matter.
[sub][sub]And don't worry Pimp, that was actually pretty funny.[/sub][/sub]

I'm kind of wondering why that grown man has a bunk bed at the moment.

OT:Kind of a pun, "I put the sexy in dyslexia."

 

[Kinguendo]

To make a pun joke is *puts on sunglasses* our pundamental right.

Really? Just saying *puts on sunglasses* between anything is worthy of YEEEEEEEAAAAAAH! now? Come on dude.

THIS is YEEEEEAAAAAAH! worthy: So... he choked on a Burger King meal? I guess he really... *puts on sunglasses*... got it his way.

 

[Kinguendo]

I use puns to PUNish my friends. They do not find them punny, but I enjoy their pain.

Dude, what is going on in your avatar? Why does he take his shirt off? And does he slap that guy in the face?!

 

[AstylahAthrys]

When is a door not a door? When it's ajar. Ha ha.

 

[Just Pman]

Why did the dolphin kill itself? Because it felt it had no porpoise in life.

 

[Smagmuck_]

Oh god puns. I need to go punch some one.

 

[gostchiken]

Went to my doctor the other day. Told him, some days I feel like a wigwam and some days I feel like a teepee. He looks at me and says, ah well you're too tents.

 

[chozo_hybrid]

Birds are grouchy in the morning because their bills are over dew.

 

[Xeros]

I can't go 10 minutes without making a facepalm-worthy pun.

EDIT: Forgot to put in a pun. *bops head*

A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories.
After about an hour, the manager came out of the office, and asked them to disperse.
?But why,? they asked, as they moved off.
?Because,? he said, ?I can?t stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer.?

 

[person427]

My favorite types of puns are the Pokemon ones.

Ditto.

 

[Marter]

My favorite types of puns are the Pokemon ones.

Ditto.

That was a good one, it made me laugh.

 

[sheic99]

Have you ever gone camping?

I hear that its intents.

I had a friend who use to say a similar one.

Have you ever seen a circus on fire?

It's intents.

 

[person427]

My favorite types of puns are the Pokemon ones.

Ditto.

That was a good one, it made me laugh.

I thought it would give you a shuckle.

 

[razerdoh]

People who point out their puns are like comedians who explain their jokes: they both think you're too stupid to get it. The only good thing about the phrase "pun intended" is that it saves you time when you want to say "hello, I'm going to be at the bag convention this weekend, please be sure to stop by and say 'hi.' I'll be at the douche exhibit." Here's the deal: when you point out your puns, you're making a value judgement on me, the reader. You're saying:

Hey reader, you see that play on words I just made? Yeah, well that wasn't an accident. In fact, I thought it was so clever that I didn't think your simple mind would be able to comprehend the brilliance of my play on words, and I wanted to make sure you know that I'm not only smart enough to use homonyms, but that I'm smart enough to point them out.

The sheer level of narcissism it takes to think that anyone gives a shit about whether or not you meant to write your pun is mind boggling. If narcissism were measured in units of mass, the skulls of people who pointed out puns would crush in on themselves in a giant black hole of stupidity.

The other variation of calling attention to a pun is the pun denial, or "no pun intended," which is a less formal way of saying:

Dear Reader,

Please direct your attention towards my pun. Admittedly I do think it's clever, but I think that you think so highly of me, that I want you to know that I would never resort to using such a commonplace literary device in my prose. Therefore, I would like to formally renounce my attempt at humor and assure you that I am above making puns as a writer, as a pupil of language, and as citizen of Earth.

Sincerest apologies,
D. Baggerson

The phrase "no pun intended" makes me want to band saw my dick off just in case I'm the last man alive and I have to risk repopulating Earth with some moron's incapable vagina. There's no such thing as an unintentional pun; the act of typing the phrase "no pun intended" makes it intentional. If your pun truly wasn't intended, then why didn't you erase it and write something else, asshole?

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=puns



i hate puns...