Poll: What is the best non weapon?

[Clueless Hero]

If I couldn't find any of my knives or blackjacks (5 knives, 2 blackjacks), I would run for a hatchet or axe. Go crazy.

 

[manaman]

I'd use a chain. They're so versatile.

There is a major problem with that. Most people I know these days have skinny little arms, not suited to swinging around a chain with any real heft.

It's like the chainsaw. Those things are not lite, and if they are lite, then it's probably just a garden saw or an electric saw. Fat chance of causing much real damage with either of those. Even if you managed to find one you could comfortable control, that was powerful enough, it's not going to last long, and will probably stop working correctly halfway through your first zombie. They where after all designed to saw through wood, not bodies.

I happen to live in the US. Should the zombie invasion happen I don't have to scrounge up an improvised weapon. I just have to go for my trusty shotgun, or one of several handguns I usually have around. Should they catch me unaware, and have me separated from any of the various weapons. I supposed them I would just grab whatever was handy.

There are knifes in the kitchen. One of the gun safes is in the laundry room. There are some tools like a pipe wrench in one of the bathrooms. The other leads into my room with a gun cabinet, There is another safe in the barn, and a couple more gun cabinets downstairs. Did I ever mention I was armed to the teeth?

 

[Akalistos]

Basic instinc of survival dictate that anyone will tried to arm themself if danger arise. But only a fool won't go for a firearm is one is for grab!

Why? Because of this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1cdYrBsWhtk

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

I would probably use a bow, its quiet, and you can get about 15 feet from the zombie, and at that point, you really can't miss, but you aren't close enough to be grabbed like with a hand weapon, then you could just retrieve the arrow.

I'd use the sub par bow I had until I could loot something better.

It is intended as a weapon though. It was designed as a weapon and is used as a weapon. I mean something you can find readily around the house. A small, TV can do wonders in a pinch if you need a heavy object to strike zombies with. It doesn't even need to be capable of delivering the last blow, just something to keep the monster away from your delicious brain.

Eh, I have a bow in the house for recreation, and I don't plan on using it for any kind of combat, so I'm counting it.

Also, a small TV is a bad idea, it's not very sturdy, it's not nearly as hard as many other household objects, you could cut yourself on the glass, and blunt objects are generally a bad idea unless you can be absolutely sure they are strong enough to crush a zombie's skull (like a sledgehammer)

My point is that it can do in an emergency situation, like a one time deal. Sure there are other, better household objects in the house but maybe not in the same room. If I needed to leave town, I wouldn't lug around a TV with me. I would probably bust out my crowbar and fight towards the nearest place with real weapons, like the local RCMP detachment.

I just don't know why you even mentioned "small tv" when the other thing you just mentioned (crowbar) would literally be better in every situation. I can't see a single situation where a small tv would be useful considering zombies feel no pain

Strike it in the head to disorient it with the small tv, leave before it can get up and get a better weapon. It is a valid strategy if nothing else is around. Again, I mentioned Crowbar but from where I am sitting right now there IS no crowbar. Readily available is this tv, right beside me. If there was more than one zombie I would break the window with the tv and escape. I'm not going to try my luck going to the garage to get my crowbar if the zombie is only a few feet away.

If a zombie gets to you and all you have on hand is a small tv, you've already fucked up, and you're going to die.

It depends on your definition of zombie but that is a debate for another thread. Lets leave it at that.

 

[Ze_Sapper]

Well, I would have to say I would go with a C9 (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/C9_LMG#Users). I live about 15 min from the military base I work at and in the case of some sort of apocalypse they would hand out weapons and ammo to us like candy on Halloween. The reason I would choose this weapon is because I'm trained with it, its accurate, it can put down a nice base of fire without wasting ammo, and its friggin badass. I would also grab a Remmington 870 Police Special (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Remington_870). I'm a Combat Engineer so this shotgun is my bread and butter, I could paint a masterpiece with this thing.

As for a non-weapon, I would have to go with a baseball bat, metal of course, because its right beside my door and its just so satisfying to bludgeon things with it.

 

[TheTurtleMan]

I would use a chainsaw because while people usually think of it as a dangerous weapon, it isn't originally designed for anything but cutting down trees.

 

[ace_of_something]

For the definition of Non-weapon lets say it is "any object that was never designed to be used as a weapon."

The term is 'improvised weapon'... at least on police reports and in the dungeons and dragons game.

Me? I'd use 'the chair leg of truth!'

Spoiler: For it is Wise and terrible

 

[Tsunimo]

if i couldn't find a real weapon i guess i'd use something else... like the bowling pin i have.
Then-again, me not finding a weapon in the knife infested place i call a room is unlikely

 

[HonkingAntalope]

An Xbox 360 power cord, or a mic stand

 

[Irony's Acolyte]

I'd probably use a shovel. Nice reach, could possibly cut off a zombie's head if you applied enough force to the thrust, and you could always just smack the FUCK out of someone swinging it club-like.
A crowbar would be pretty useful too. You can use it to pry open stuff and the "hooked" end could probably pierce the skull.

 

[Orcus The Ultimate]

I would certainly choose:

"PASSIVE AGRESSIVE KOMBAT !"

watch at 2.56

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bqieymT7z14

 

[Orcus The Ultimate]

I'd say most probably an axe. I know that sort of counts as a weapon, but not 'technically', if it's for woodcutting. One of those little ones, a hatchet. That'd do the trick. Light, but very lethal.

It depends on the opponent though. Obviously, things like zombies, you'd want to put them down, fast, but things like soldiers, it'd be a bit trickier. You'd have to get the jump on them, so a knife would be better.

i'd use a freakin' teddybear! it's so cuddly and fuzzy that it might kill them! XD

either that or:

An Ostrich!

 

[Sam Aldam]

Hmmm, non-weapon I'd use... well, if I was fighting relatively slow and weak opponents, like a really fragile alien or a badly wounded and unarmed soldier, I'd use a knife or a screwdriver. Against a fast moving opponent I'd strap a heap of petrol containers to myself and blow it all up, I'd die anyhow so may as well go out with a BANG. Against a tough opponent, or a zombie, I'd have to resort to real weapons, I would be useless with any melee weapon, I'd have to cheat and use a shotgun or crossbow or other ranged weapon due to a combination of bad reflexes and abysmal upper body strength.

 

[Totenkopf]

A shovel. It's just trustworthy.

 

[soilent]

2 crowbars in my garage, dual wield that shit

 

[BlindMessiah94]

I'd beat them to death with an original Xbox controller.

Haha, that's funny.

The reason I never got an XBOX was because of the controller actually. I tried it at a friends house and my hand was aching after 20 mins. I have small hands, but not that small and it was a pain.

OT: Crowbar. I'm original I know. But it's practical.

 

[Dr. Danger]

Forget crowbars. Give me a wrench!

Edit: Or maybe frying pan.

 

[Samurai Goomba]

Big flashlight. Why? Because what else are you gonna use at night. Flares? Torches? Neither of those things are going to help you club a zombie's brains in.

 

[Sark]

My bass guitar. It is indestructable.