Relationship Deal-Breakers

[Dr Spaceman]

Have you ever had an experience like this?

So a girl invites you over. You're having a great time. "Man, she's hot." You think. She asks you if you want more wine. "Yeah, of course." She steps out. Like any curious young man, you look around the room. What the hell? Pearl Harbor? She likes Pearl Harbor?? Maybe it's her roommates. Please, God. She comes back. "These your movies?" "Yeah, all my favorites. I just love the way these people find their way to each other. Nothing can keep them apart. I mean, don't you just love Kate Hudson?" And then it hits you. There are no books in this room. "I just read Love in the Time of Cholera, a wonderfully beautiful romance." "Oh, I don't really read." My final answer: "Oh, I guess we better stop talking."

Are there behaviors, book/movie/music preferences, or usage of certain phrases that would just cause you to give up all hope of ever having any meaningful relationship.

Unless of course, she's that smokin' hot redhead from Mad Men. Holy shit.

 

[jim_doki]

well Doc, it's simple


choose one, your brain or your loins

by which i mean look at what you're looking for. a stable relationship, or to get your leg over

 

[KefZ_X]

I want to hear the rest of the story first.

 

[Ultrajoe]

Not to Deja Nazi, but i think we have one of these.

 

[Dr Spaceman]

I want to hear the rest of the story first.

Well uh, after the "Maybe we should stop talking" line, we did. But you may notice I didn't say, "Maybe I should leave."

The point really is: what would make you automatically veto a relationship even if it doesn't preclude a more... physical... acquaintance.

 

[Ares Tyr]

Strong Republican, Conservative, Christian beliefs. Nothing grinds my gears more than someone who finds sexual relations to be immoral. My life style is based around the pursuit of things considered immoral. I love to fight, and I love to make love, and I love death metal and all sorts of things that the good Southern Baptist girl (which populate where I live) would be despised by.

And those ladies, however hot, are not for me. I've befriended a few, but as far as romantic relationships, not a go for me.

I would say "I hate it when a girl doesn't read and watches shit like 'The Hills' and 'Laguna Beach'" but because I've been in long-term relationships with girls who do that stuff, I can't really make that claim, haha.

Don't get me wrong, I've dated Christians and athiests. And only those, thus far, actually.

 

[poleboy]

I would say "I hate it when a girl doesn't read and watches shit like 'The Hills' and 'Laguna Beach'" but because I've been in long-term relationships with girls who do that stuff, I can't really make that claim, haha.

Most girls watch crap like that. My theory is that it has a cathartic effect for them to watch braindead women get jerked around.

 

[Ares Tyr]

Interesting theory, poleboy...

 

[Hey Joe]

I won't go out with a girl if they can't point to Iraq on a map. Probably why I haven't gone out on a date for about 6 months. Damn my unusually high standards!

 

[elffymon]

he spends $200 on Lego on his 21st birthday

 

[flatearth]

A good brain is the only real requirement, without one you have no chances with me.

I often can tell what kind of a person someone is with four questions:

1. What is your favourite movie
2. What is your favourite band
3. What is your favourite book
4. What is your favourite color

Movie and color often answers the question of what kind of view on life the person has. Is she optimistic or pessimistic, romantic, intellectual, the view on world...
Book is there to see how much she reads, if she reads at all, and then what kind of literature. If the answer is a book intended for children or teens, that tells a lot. If the book is something written by Stephen Hawkings, you know she has to have some kind of grip on higher mathematics and physics.
Band also gives a good view on the person, you can tell a lot from a person if she listens to bands like The backstreet boys or Tokyo Hotel. This also tells a lot of the personal style she goes by. If you listen to rap or RnB, I'm leaving

 

[Rockerallan]

he spends $200 on Lego on his 21st birthday

Haha awesome, I wouldn't see that as a deal breaker you could build stuff together as a form of bonding...I love lego.

 

[flatearth]

How about the fact that I will very soon spend about 1000$ on building my own arcade cabinet, and I'm 25?

My own girlfriend doesn't mind, she actually is just happy that I have some creative thing to do, and that it makes me happy.

 

[Mariena]

I spent around 2000 euros on a TRG-42 when I was 19..

Cough.. But it was so worth it. Hey, it's my hobby! Leave me alone! When you like things, you spend money on them. I guess that's how it works. As long as the hobby isn't too crazy it shouldn't ruin the relationship. .. Unless he/she is a stuckup person or has a phobia for exactly that hobby.

 

[Tibullus]

A good brain is the only real requirement, without one you have no chances with me.

I often can tell what kind of a person someone is with four questions:

1. What is your favourite movie
2. What is your favourite band
3. What is your favourite book
4. What is your favourite color

I had to register to post this I found this viewpoint that offensively shallow. I mean just what the hell? You form a full psych profile of an individual based on their facebook and myspace page? Get real mate.

Do mine do mine!

Favourite film: Team America
Favourite band: I'm not really into indie music/rock bands at the mo. My favourite dance music DJ is David Guetta
Favourite book: The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho
Favourite colour: Blue

So what interesting facts can you glean from my personality? I'd be interested to know so I can prove you wrong. Granted you're bound to get a few things right, but your opinion will be so impoverished it might as well be worthless.

As for brains. Who cares so long as you get on with them and enjoy spending time with them?

So I won't completely slate you without providing my own judgement system.

I honestly believe that if you want to know what someone's like, the worst way of finding out is to ask them. At worst, you'll find out what they want you to think they're like, and at best you'll find out what they think they're like (v. post-modern I know). I often find a quick, but ultimately inadequate way of judging someone is how they act towards and around their friends. If they don't have any friends, something might be up.

Generally if you want to get your measure of someone you need to identify the values that are important to them. Do they have a lot of time for friends and family? Do they care about appearances? Are they generous? What's really important for them and why? And so on.

Favourite film? How completely ridiculous. As for the guy who dropped the girl because she didn't read, that's your loss bro, and your punishment.

The one dealbreaker for me is selfish people. I can't have any meaningful relationship with people who only care about themselves.

Rant over.

 

[elffymon]

he spends $200 on Lego on his 21st birthday

Haha awesome, I wouldn't see that as a deal breaker you could build stuff together as a form of bonding...I love lego.

it wasn't just the lego... that was one of the last things.. i think hes still single, im pretty sure hes 24 now

 

[Saskwach]

I won't go out with a girl if they can't point to Iraq on a map. Probably why I haven't gone out on a date for about 6 months. Damn my unusually high standards!

Here's the question: do you have country borders on this map or not?

 

[Typecast]

I prefer to give the biological imperatives full reign. If all your senses are telling you this one can make the best babies they're probably right. However, if you want all that 'meaningful relationship' crap that everyone seems to bang on about, you're going to have to tone down your sex drive and find something to talk about. This is a two way street. You both have to find common ground, regardless of whether one of you listens to indie rock band with obscure name no.# 58^7280, which sounds the same as all the others, and the other can't stand the sound of any human being singing(me).