Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

[TheLastSamurai14]

I wish that I could go to the moon!

"WHY WAIT!?" *launched*

OT: Granted, but it's only used by an alien species over 20 light years away.

I wish that all the retweeters on the herpderpedia Twitter page had the average IQ of all Escapists.

 

[pyramid head grape]

Granted. You go insane with all the green in one room!

I wish for a faster phone!

 

[Robert632]

Granted. Your phone runs away from home. It's too damn fast for anything to satch, so you never see it again.

I wish George Lucas was making a prequel trilogy to Indiana Jones:Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.

 

[Philol]

Granted, but they're absolute dog shite.

I wish that I was King of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland.

 

[him over there]

Edit: sorry wrong page

Granted, you are self proclaimed king and have no power over the parliament or anyone really.

I wish my Ipod didn't have a crack in it.

 

[Philol]

Granted, but it doesn't play music anymore.

I wish that all street vendors would fuck off for good.

 

[Dr.Susse]

Granted the economy collapses.

I wish for more Tom Bake voice overs.

 

[cameron112497]

Granted, but Tom Bake has recently become a mime and all the voiceovers are silent.

I wish my laptop became a supercomputer

 

[Robert632]

Granted. You never get to use it anymore, as it's constantly fighting crime.



I wish for a desk with sparklers that cover the entire surface of it.

 

[ToastiestZombie]

Granted but the sparklers are not protected and you suffer terrible burns.

I wish for Sonic Generations to have good keyboard controls (downloading it now lol)

 

[Chairman Miaow]

wish granted, but your download breaks.

I wish I had enjoyed Skyrim as much as I was expecting to

 

[ToastiestZombie]

Wish granted, but you enjoy it so much that you can't stop playing it.

I wish that the new drawing tablet I'm trying out was less bloody amazing.

 

[JLML]

Granted, it's now a rock tablet.

I wish the name ToastiestZombie didn't make me hungry for BBQ. Which is ironic, since I'm a vegetarian. Kinda. And also a zombie. <.<

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted. You are now hungry for celery. In fact celery is the only thing you can eat anymore. BTW you will die if you only eat celery. Cheers!

I wish for more internet drama, MORE!

 

[ToastiestZombie]

Granted, but it's not the funny kind. It's the annoying destroy everything kind.

I wish for a bigger desk

 

[Kuroneko97]

Granted. It gets magically flipped over and lands on top of your, and it is too heavy for you to remove. Also, a puma barges into your house, and watches you struggle under the desk.

I wish I could stop involving pumas barging into houses in my wish grantings.

 

[JLML]

Granted, now it's cougar instead.

I wish I could fly.

 

[ToastiestZombie]

Granted, but now you cant walk.

I wish for time to go faster when I'm bored.

 

[JLML]

Granted, but only with 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 percent.

I wish I could travel through time.

 

[ToastiestZombie]

Granted, but you can only travel back into the middle of major battles. Meaning you will probably get shot.

I wish my wish ruins weren't so morbid.