Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

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zombiekiller1907

New member
May 5, 2011
1,158
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Granted. A freak accident caused your body to meld with a toilet bowl while teleporting to the comfort room. You can't move or teleport, and people somehow don't notice that you're there. They proceed to pee and poo on you for the rest of eternity.

I wish that I could get better at forum games
 

AwkwardTurtle

New member
Aug 21, 2011
886
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Granted. You become so good at forum games that you become famous on the Escapist. However, your rise to in popularity brings out haters and soon The Escapist forums are torn asunder in a virtual war between those who love zombiekiller1907 and those who hate zombiekiller1907. It doesn't end there. Soon the followers and haters spread their influence onto other parts of the internet, reddit, 4chan, facebook, youtube, twitter, and myspace just kidding no one uses myspace anymore.

This all out internet war permeates into mainstream culture, and soon even world leaders are concerned with the effects of your sudden popularity. Several leaders are afraid that you might try and start our own nation since so many people adore you. So, naturally they send a team of secret agents to hunt you down and assassinate you. Your mission, should you choose to accept it is to discover the identity of these would-be assassins and take them out before they get to you.

Whether you manage to survive these assassination attempts all depends on whether or not you have the very particular set of skills needed to survive.

Once again I spent too much time on this post. I was leaning towards world destruction, but decided for a more personal touch.

I wish my lips would stop getting dry. (I know I need to drink more water, but I just can't seem to get enough.)
 

zombiekiller1907

New member
May 5, 2011
1,158
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that was a cool post. And yeah, I keep getting dry lips too.

OT:
You find out that the only cure is a french kiss from... uh... the members of kiss.

I wish for a better idea.
 

Living_Brain

When in doubt, overclock
Feb 8, 2012
1,426
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Granted. [ERROR:48677] The was an error in the wish and the good idea goes to someone else instead.
I wish to travel into the future where The WarZ and Source 2 is out, which means before 2014.
 

LynxParadox

New member
Oct 4, 2009
988
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Granted. but you soon find out that the future society is on the brink of colaps Due to a war started in 2013, but on the bright side your games are still available to play as you wait for certain death

I wish for a time machine.
 

AwkwardTurtle

New member
Aug 21, 2011
886
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Granted, but it can only take you forward in time, and you age the number of years you go forward.

I wish I was friends with a superhero.
 

zombiekiller1907

New member
May 5, 2011
1,158
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funny, I was on a WLIIA marathon earlier.

Granted. Colin, Ryan, and the original cast aren't in it, which made it suck.

I wish that i was better at doing improv
 

AwkwardTurtle

New member
Aug 21, 2011
886
0
0
Granted, you are given a nice coat but it is made up of some kind of animal product so as soon as you go out in public a member of PETA soak you in blood, thus ruining your coat.

I wish I could successfully rob a bank.
 

Living_Brain

When in doubt, overclock
Feb 8, 2012
1,426
0
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Granted. Aquaman. DepressionMan. Your notoriety makes you infamous.
I wish for the sun to come out.