Sexuality; Double Standards

[Kakashi on crack]

So I've noticed increasingly that men are being told to keep it in their pants while women are being told more and more to explore their sexuality.

Now, I'm not trying to start a flame war, or be sexist here, but does anyone else feel that this is becoming a societal double standard? Wondering people's opinions on this, all views and comments (within reason) accepted, let the talking commence!

 

[OutforEC]

I would hazard a guess to say it's less about instituting a double standard as much as a step towards correcting a double-standard that's already in place.

 

[Kahunaburger]

I would hazard a guess to say it's less about instituting a double standard as much as a step towards correcting a double-standard that's already in place.

This. 95% of the time, most of our culture is telling men to "explore their sexuality" and women to keep their pants on. 5% of the time, people try to push back against that.

 

[Chemical Alia]

I have a feeling it's just you. I don't know where you're hearing these things, but I'll hazard a guess that you're a guy, and that you're just more sensitive to things you hear that seem to affect you personally and that's what you're noticing.

 

[Terminal Blue]

So I've noticed increasingly that men are being told to keep it in their pants while women are being told more and more to explore their sexuality.

Have you ever heard the word 'slut', what about 'whore' or 'tramp'?

If anything, there's a lot of focus on female sexuality because it's still under construction. 100 years ago, it was general scientific knowledge that women did not have a sexuality and did not feel sexual desire except in the most passive sense. Sigmund Freud was literally the first influential and notable person in at least a century, probably two or three, to suggest that women possessed any kind of sexual desire beyond a completely passive desire to be fucked by anything that came along.

Until relatively recently, women were put in mental institutions because they were found to have 'abnormal' levels of sexual desire (characterized as nymphomania). Incidentally.. men cannot be nymphomaniacs and any situation in which you've heard the word used to describe a man is medically unsound. The male term is satyrisis, there's a reason you've never heard of it because it has almost never been diagnosed.

So yes, there's pretty massive evidence that society was not very fair before. What you're observing, if anything, is the correction towards a fairly balanced centre. Still, if you think that women are not regulated or judged on their sexual behaviour.. oh I really think you need to rethink that one.

Also, consider how much of the problem is to do with the ways in which men and women are perceived to behave promiscuously. Women are still generally believed (increasingly incorrectly) to be more focused on establishing emotional relationships than sexual ones, and those who aren't have a whole variety of nasty words attached to them, so men who sleep with lots of women are generally believed to be either decieving or degrading their partners in doing so.

Women who sleep with many men are more likely to be assumed to be engaging in informed consensual behavior. Unless a woman is married, you'll very seldom hear any allegation that she is mistreating her male partners, or that they are in any way stupid or naive for going along with it. In this sense, we still see the enduring legacy of that 19th century idea that women are just the passive objects of male sexuality. Men are seen to gain and possess something through fucking lots of women. Women are just seen as being possessed a lot. One is in many ways more positive, but might also be regarded as more abusive, than the other.

 

[pixiejedi]

I agree that a lot of it is a attempt to correct the already existing double standard, it just also happens to have biological underpinnings too. A guys organ is outside, you all seem to be very emotionally attached, names, measuring, playing with and the like. Girls can't see what they are working with without a mirror or a video camera or something like that. There is also the whole menstration thing, so I can see a connection between the penis and pleasure and the vagina and awkwardness and pain. I kind of always thought the idea of female sexual exploration had more to do with loving and accepting yourself even if it looks all weird down stairs.

 

[HandfulofWolf]

So I've noticed increasingly that men are being told to keep it in their pants while women are being told more and more to explore their sexuality.

Now, I'm not trying to start a flame war, or be sexist here, but does anyone else feel that this is becoming a societal double standard? Wondering people's opinions on this, all views and comments (within reason) accepted, let the talking commence!

I don't see the problem here. I'm willing to calm down if it means that a girl is more likely to approach me.

 

[Sir Thomas Sean Connery]

I find the EVERYONE is being told to keep it in their pants as of late.

We need more town sponsored orgies.

 

[mrht101]

Spoiler: Reminds me of this

 

[Sir Thomas Sean Connery]

I find the EVERYONE is being told to keep it in their pants as of late.

We need more town sponsored orgies.

No. We don't. I would be overwhelmingly happy if my entire generation had their sexual organs removed and the desire for sexual activity wiped out. I'd never have to worry about my inadequacy ever again.

Well YOU don't have to come... (And I COULD recommend some products)

 

[Lazier Than Thou]

Historically, it has been women(in western civilization) that have held the reins in terms of sexuality. Proof of this is the fact that it's a crime to rape a woman, but a woman "raping" a man is almost entirely unheard of. This shows that western society has placed the burden of responsibility on the women to make the proper decisions as to who, where, and when in terms of sex. Biologically, this is a fantastic choice as women have the most to win and lose in terms of their mate choices.

Unfortunately, since the sexual revolution of the 70s, women have thrown off their responsibilities. It has now become the duty of men to say no instead of women. It's a shift in sexual roles that is not biologically based, so it cannot last. Expect to see many more fatherless children.

 

[hexFrank202]

People sure are really using the phrase 'hazard a guess' a lot in this thread.

 

[Lavi]

So I've noticed increasingly that men are being told to keep it in their pants while women are being told more and more to explore their sexuality.

Now, I'm not trying to start a flame war, or be sexist here, but does anyone else feel that this is becoming a societal double standard? Wondering people's opinions on this, all views and comments (within reason) accepted, let the talking commence!

Because men have historically been allowed to explore their sexuality all they damn-well please. Women, on the other hand, were told how to act and punished if they did something outside very specific parameters. It's just leveling the playing field.

 

[Stu35]

As long as we (men) continue to earn more money, run the majority of countries, then we're still winning. Of course, there is an overall trend whereby the feminist movement is attempting to gain, not equality, but domination.

An example - recently one of our MPs Kenneth Clarke made a rather stupid comment about degrees of Rape. Obviously this resulted in a massive backlash. In one statement, one feminist group spokeswoman stated something along the lines of "this won't be resolved until the government realises that all men are potential rapists".

Here is the link to a report on the original faux-pas by Clarke - Linky [http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-13436429]

Now, I'll try to find the news article with the quote originating from the feminist group, as it highlights quite well where the dramas come from regarding the double standards being employed in what is, at present, an attempt to level the playing field - however what we are seeing, is that as the field becomes more level, they don't seem to be relenting.

 

[Dreiko_v1legacy]

Part of it is that lesbians are cool as far as men are concerned, part of it is an overreaction to sexual comments, as though expressing wanting to have sex with someone is inherently abusive, no matter how politely one goes about it.


In the end, it's less about men being told to keep it in their pants and more women wanting to be free of men's attention...of course this only applies to men women don't actually want to sleep with, thus is utterly subjective and arbitrary.

 

[Sordak]

OP is right.

Its funny tho. Also its funny how most people are pissed cause if women are called sluts and guys are called Heroes if they have alot of sex.
But actually its so easy to explain.

For a Woman its not hard to get lots of sex, even if shes ugly there will still be guys that want to do her, always without any exception. For a Dude its way harder. Therfore a dude that has sex ofthen is considered a hero, and a Woman is a whore.