Should I file a sexual harassment claim?

[Lem0nade Inlay]

Blackmail her for money.

 

[Smooth Operator]

Christ man, how about you tell her you don't like that before you cost someone their job...

 

[AceAngel]

JUST STOP AND READ THIS YOU BLOODY FLAB OF FAT! READ MY BLOODY POST!

You have no right in firing a person, another human, being just because you didn't do the right appropriate thing and actually didn't try solving this issue as an adult.

Man up, grow up and think logically for a second...do you really want to get her fired without actually being honest to yourself? Will you be able to sleep at night? Did she rape you? Did she blackmail you? Did she do anything to you in anyway or form that was hellbent on ruining your life?

A family friend experienced some issue...boo hoo, friends lie mate, and most importantly, you're trying to tell me that you're no better then the person who got your family friend fired? That you're a two dimming, penny vented, conniving, immoral, thoughtless, mindless blob of a monotone who's simply imitating and doing exactly the opposite of what a fully developed and creature of thought would do?

Or maybe you actually liked this 'family friend' a whole lot, and what happened to them, you see it as a chance to bring back the pain to a totally other person in return, as a form of vengeance to make your life feel better, and that it's less under control. That whatever happens to the people around you and even you, by having the power to exert some kind of power and harming other people, makes you feel better?

Confront and politely ask her to tone it down or stop. If that doesn't help, ask management to do something about it. Once you see that she doesn't stop and has more morbid intentions, then it is your duty to protect yourself, however, only if you can judge that what she is doing is wrong and could harm her marriage and/or your life.

However, if it's just mild flirting, with no rhyme or reason, no thought, no malice, no core of it being something more or deeper, then man up. Grow up, and build some tolerance for yourself.

If this post angered you, take a breaker and go out to smoke or get some fresh air. Come back and read this post again, and make a reasonable decision...don't ruin one person's life, just because you couldn't handle a persons...an "old" person's way of showing their affection and maybe bringing a smile to their own self for a few hours in a day, out of miserable day in their life.

 

[Brawndo]

I call bullshit. There is no old lady. Or if there is, the OP isn't offended, or has already talked to the lady and she's stopped. The whole point of this thread was supposed to be to indirectly point out a sexist double standard.

...Well, my cards are on the table. Has anyone else suggested this? Has the OP commented on it?

EDIT: I just went back and reviewed some of the earlier pages more thoroughly. I'm not sure, because I didn't find a direct comment about it from the OP, but it seems there were quite a few who asserted this around page 2 and 3. The vast majority of posts take the him completely seriously though. In fact, most of them are either "Just ask her to stop," or "Get the hell over it you wimp." That's a little frustrating because not only is it obnoxiously apparent that other people have posted those responses, but I know the OP has responded to the first one at least. It's just bad forum etiquette. Some others have delved into the actual topic of sexist double standards with complete sincerity, and... well, I guess I just have to congratulate the OP for getting that to happen. Well done.

Also, there's an astonishing number of people who seem to envy the OP's story about being felt up by a soon-to-be-retiree. Not sure how I should take that.

This is the correct response. Thank you. Apparently most people fail to read past the OP in their rush to hit the reply button and furiously type out their indignation. As one other savvy poster in this thread said, sometimes you can put "THIS IS SATIRE" on the bottom of the OP and people will still miss it.

The Escapist is particularly fun to do this with because there are so many uppity, highly-opinionated people here. I was highly amused and pleased at the success of my thread and the conversation about double-standards that I intended it to provoke; I had fully expected it to die after two pages at most.

 

[Eisenfaust]

a guy filing a sexual harassment claim? i would imagine that the entire office would ridicule you forever...

 

[Sheppard]

How about you grow a quad and take her for a tumble.

Joking.

I was in a similar situation last year. I asked them to tone down the flirting abit. It doesn't hurt their feelings if they are playfully flirting.

 

[Bohemian Waltz]

I call bullshit. There is no old lady. Or if there is, the OP isn't offended, or has already talked to the lady and she's stopped. The whole point of this thread was supposed to be to indirectly point out a sexist double standard.

...Well, my cards are on the table. Has anyone else suggested this? Has the OP commented on it?

YES, this has been suggested, this is true. He is pointing this out.
Everyone who continues to comment obviously has no clue that he's just trolling to make his stupid point.

WHY IS THIS TOPIC STILL HERE?

Because a majority of the members here are more concerned with spouting their own opinions regardless of it's value as a contribution and because the OP is carefully constructed monument to trolldom made specifically to spark a prevalent common reaction to make a crude point.

Posters inability to read past the OP before rushing off to express themselves by screaming desperately into the void also factors in.

OT: "You should ask her to stop, then inform a supervisor, then if all else fails file a complaint with HR department, then file suit. Or move on with your life and do something more productive then post fictional stories here with the intent to troll and make stupid points. DERP DERP"

 

[Moosh50]

I started a part-time job at a state agency about four weeks ago, and there is a married woman in her early 50s who works there who is not my direct superior, but is still above me. She appears tired and sulky most of the time, but whenever she sees me she brightens up immediately. She acts flirty every time she talks to me and often gives me compliments on what I am wearing that day. She has grabbed my biceps at least twice before and asked whether I work out.

Yesterday I got a buzzcut, and today at work she unexpectedly came up from behind me when I was seated and ran her hands all over my head and commented how I look like the guy from Prison Break.

Now it's very possible she is being an innocent flirt because she is bored at work and means nothing by it, but I am going to choose to feel violated and offended instead. I am not a sexual object, and I demand to be taken seriously at my job!

Should I file a claim and potentially ruin this woman's long career and marriage?

Yes, file the fuck out of her.

Gender equality is a *****, *****.

 

[Evidencebased]

Delusions of imaginary old ladies touching your hair? Sexual harassment from a woman who doesn't even exist? Purely fabricated arm-groping? I think you should skip the lawsuit and see a shrink. Or hell, call the Ghostbusters!

(Or you could learn to be a little more skeptical about family friends who swear they "just touched her thigh!" and maybe not believe someone so easily when they're bitter about being fired? And then you could avoid posting hypothetical troll posts about how super mean women are?)

 

[Druss the Legend]

She acts flirty every time she talks to me and often gives me compliments on what I am wearing that day. She has grabbed my biceps at least twice before and asked whether I work out.

Yesterday I got a buzzcut, and today at work she unexpectedly came up from behind me when I was seated and ran her hands all over my head...

Wear bad clothing and dont wash your hair. Just act really distasteful around her.
If she continues then she might be a bit batty.

 

[etherlance]

It just came to my attention that I fell into a Troll trap when I posted my opinion.


For a few moments I actually believed this was a genuine problem but thankfully I have come back to my senses.

 

[Loonyyy]

This guy clearly is not being serious, just read his comments. He doesn't want or need life advice, he realises that Sexual Harassment is and should be an important topic and is utilising it to both annoy people and get attention. Don't feed trolls, it's exactly the reason he is doing this.

 

[Magnesium360]

but I am going to choose to feel violated and offended instead. I am not a sexual object, and I demand to be taken seriously at my job!

This is, in itself, a good enough reason to file a sexual harassment claim. If you feel harassed, you are being sufficiently harassed to justify a claim. If you file a claim, you are completely justified in doing so. File a claim if you want to, don't if you don't. If it's interfering with you and your work, ask her to stop. If she doesn't, then file a claim

 

[Greyhald]

I'd say it hinges more on the word "sexual".

Yeah. Covered that with "based on gender or sexual preference".

Admitedly touching someone's head is fucking weird, same with the arm thing. But I wouldn't call it sexual. Also, complimenting someone's clothes is not sexual harrassment unless the compliment is "Those jeans really bring out your dick." Whatever about the touching, some people have personal space issues, but if a compliment = harassment then the world is totally fucked.

My god. Are all the real women in the world disappearing to such an extent that you havn't run into one? There's the overtly sexual women and then there's the ones who can turn you on without you even realising they've done anything. There's also women at every step of the spectrum inbetween. I imagine there's men too but I can't say I've ever paid attention.

Things don't have to be rude, crass or overt to be sexual. One day you'll learn this first hand.